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Type A personality and Type 1 diabetes

C

CherylEwing

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I have been on the Medtronic pump with a sensor for a year now. Blood sugar levels are at their worst. I find myself micromanaging the pump and fiddling and adjusting it the whole day. I look at my levels all the time and it's ruining my life personally and mentally. I am so emotionally attached to my levels and the constant feedback is putting me into a depressive and obsessive state. Am I the only one???
 
I'm not sure but if that was me, I'd not use the sensor any more. I pay close attention to my levels - that is, try to stay in range, but I don't let it impact on my life.

The BS target is a range not a single figure, and that's how I think about it. That works for me.
 
If the sensor is ruining your life, turn the sensor off.

I'm sure anyone wearing a CGM will go through a bit of a period of being a bit obsessed by watching it, but if that doesn't fade with the novelty and it's making you depressed it doesn't seem like the sensor is doing you any good.

If you don't want to/can't turn the sensor off have a look at Steven pondors advice on productive ways to micromanage - http://www.sugarsurfing.com/learn-to-surf
 

It's a fair question. I had a tendency to constantly fiddle with adjustments when on strips, and the first thing my DSN said when I got a libre was, oh, no, Scott, you're probably going to fiddle with things even more now!

To be honest, I still do, but in a more positive way, the odd 1u or 5g here or there.

But one of the things I've learned from cgm (yes, I know, libre isn't technically cgm, but for practical purposes, it is) is appreciating the "shape" of insulin over time. On strips, I might have been tempted to stack in the last two hours of IOB action if still a little high, but now it's easy to see from the graph that there can still be quite a drop in that last two hours, so I don't adjust for a lot of situations, whereas I might have been tempted to on strips.

Your question suggests you're over-reacting to the cgm graph. I know what it's like taking a correction bolus, seeing nothing happen, so take another, a classic stacking situation. I think it is important to realise that corrections take time, so I've learned to be patient - it will kick in eventually.

And for lows, when I see a slow slide which might end up in hypo territory, it's extraordinary what a tiny 5g does to tweak it back up before I get anywhere near hypo.

There can definitely be a huge info overload with cgm, but I think the important thing is not to respond to everything, but instead see the broad patterns, and realise that a tweak will take time to show. Seeing as insulin operates in an unpredictable way over an extended period of time, it's counterproductive to micro-manage it. That 5g or 1u will take time to show up on the graph, so don't be tempted to have another 5g/1u before it shows.
 
CherylEwing said:
Am I the only one???
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@CherylEwing you are absolutely not the only one. I am an over-invested obsessive micromanager.

My pump and my Libre have improved my control and I have far fewer hypos. But I am obsessed by the lines on my graph, and the numbers have a direct and profound effect on my mood. Day by day, hour by hour, minute by minute. But because of this technology I feel I have control over something I can now, well, better control. I micromanage as much as I used to pre-pump and pre-Libre, yet thankfully with more hope and more likelihood of being pleased with myself rather than disgusted with myself.

What @Scott-C says above about patience, and view broad patterns, is very valuable advice which I need reminding about myself. Thank you Scott.

I'm a work in progress.

So I'm afraid Cheryl I have no advice to offer that will fix it, but I just wanted to introduce myself as a kindred spirit!

Love Snapsy
 
CherylEwing said:
Blood sugar levels are at their worst.
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Why is that? Is it because you are micromanaging (e.g. overcompensating now and going low later)? Or is it because your diabetes has become more difficult to control?

When you are in an obsessive state it can be hard to answer that question objectively. You can create a vicious cycle where you get more and more obsessive and make things worse and worse. (Don't forget that stress and anxiety raise blood sugars.)

If your micromanagement is making your diabetes worse, use that as motivation to help you stop!

If, on the other hand, your diabetes has become more difficult to control—whether it's due to lifestyle changes, end of honeymoon period, or just your hormonal balance changing—that is something you will have to come to terms with. As my honeymoon period slowly ended, I got more and more obsessive to compensate, and it was the wrong reaction. What I needed to do was to revise my expectations, loosen my control and try things I hadn't tried before (like low-carb diet, CGM, and a few other crazy things that turned out to be quite helpful).
 

I thought I was an alien but I think I'm just about the same as you: I live diabetes, breathe diabetes and it also affects my mood like nothing else.
I put on Libre this Tuesday and thought "I think this will me me calmer and try to understand better what is going on" - oh, how wrong was I. Since that day my readings at the Libre and at my meter differ so much, I'm almost taking the sensor out because it's making me mad! I wish I had something nicer to tell you but I think I am as out of control as you
 
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I think we all have such different experiences with life and diabetes that perhaps it's the case that we all represent different shades of 'normal'.

My own 'normal' is a fixed determination to be between two lines.

Because of this thread I've just spent 10 minutes doing an online 'personality test'! And I don't know whether to be amused or horrified by what it says about me......



@deborabaratto I'm sticking my neck out here but do give the Libre time - I rarely compare mine with blood test readings, but it's invaluable for tracking trends.
 
I do have a pump but not libre. I find that anxiety and depression tends to worsen my control- eating and exercise habits remain consistent so I assume that cortisol is blocking my insulin. Diabetes is a self managed condition and that causes guilt, anxiety and depression /anger (different sides of the same coin). Personally I am struggling with similar feelings but my anxiety is around eating carbs and even proteins. I think you could try cutting down on checking to limited times in the day maybe just for 1 day and see how it feels? My mantra had been NOT to become what I term a 'professional' diabetic and we deserve a normal life so I am going to eat something this evening just to see what happens!
 
I'm a perfectionist and pretty anxious person at the best of times; anytime I see a blood sugar level anything other than perfect it frustrates me and I feel angry and disappointed. Whilst I love my Dexcom G5 and would not be without it, I must admit that the rare occasions where I have a bit of a gap between sensors feel like a bit of a "holiday" as I am less obsessive and worried about constantly checking where I'm at.
 

True story. My sensor is really dodgy but Abbott will replace it as soon as possible I'm gonna give it another try!
 
No pump no sensor. 33 years. Highest A1C about 6.6. Average BS on meter between 5 and 6.5.
 
I don't have a pump or CGM/Libre style device but I know my mind would be very interested on the data and information and I would spend even more time thinking and managing than I already do. I'm already expecting a telling off at some point for the amount of testing I do (though I don't feel it's excessive personally).

I cut myself some slack but I still get a little bit upset with myself when the numbers are outside the range I strive to be in either way.
 

no your not alone : ) I would think alot of us feel down when our sugars are all over the place,when you see them good numbers its feels pretty good all you can do is do your best try not to let your sugars get you down,stress can be a pain in the ass on your sugars also
 
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