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Weepy me!

S

shop

Well-Known Member
Messages
665
Hi Folkes,

Feel a bit silly writing this but sused if anyone is going to know how I am feeling is likely to be one of you guys. Carb Counting is going ok. Seem to be going in the right direction albeit slowly.

Anyway had my 1st hypo in 2 weeks this morning ( absolutely no reason for it, as I had my snack before bed ) which has been giving me good morning readings. I also had a reasonable practice nurse appt yesterday. ( so nothing to complain about there apart from as I already know my HBA1C needs to come down )

I spoke to one of the Mums at school who is aware that I have been having probs recently, she didnt know that I have been T1 for 6 yrs ( I have kept it under wraps to avoid drawing attention to myself and making a fuss, all part of being in denial ) She said that one of the other mums has just been diagnosed, " but has pretty good control!! I was going to offer support but actualy feel like I would be a negative impact right now as I am feeling sooo down, and she seems to be OK!

I am feeling soooo down, cant stop crying and feel a failure, pathetic I know! I am really keen to get to grips with this carb counting but feel like the goal I am trying to achieve is Soooo far away.

Lucy :(

Anyway just wanted a moan coz if anyone is going to understand you guys will.
 
Awww just a big hug coming your way. I'm in the same boat, but I'm actually gaining weight. If I'd ever had to diet at this point I would be throwing in the towel, as it is this has to be my way of eating now.
 
dawnmc said:
Awww just a big hug coming your way. I'm in the same boat, but I'm actually gaining weight. If I'd ever had to diet at this point I would be throwing in the towel, as it is this has to be my way of eating now.
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Thanks Dawn.......Sending hugs to you too (((x))) Lucy.
 
Hi Lucy

Please don't be too hard on yourself - I've spent 40 years being rubbish at diabetes. :lol:

This year I've been trying to sort it out, but it sounds like you're doing way better than me. I know the drill, but the reality is so different. I've had loads of minor hypos in the past 2 weeks (none serious) so well done you :clap:

Robert
 
Thanks Robert! your always so inspirational and motivational. We will get there!! We are only human I guess :thumbup:
 
Lucy,

(((((( HUGE HUGS ))))))

It sounds like you have mild depression. I can empathise with the weepiness etc, I'm going through it myself. I'm not diabetic, but I started low carbing when my husband was diagnosed and it's a slow road for me too....like I get near the goal and someone moves the goalposts!

I've suffered with depression for 18 years. I used to be able to cope with it myself, just appearing a bit withdrawn to everyone else. Lately we've had a lot of things to deal with, some real lemons, and I haven't been able to cope. Lots of tears, huge feelings of failure - all of the things you're probably familiar with. Two weeks ago I plucked up the courage to speak to the new lady GP at our surgery and, although I'm not on any antidepressants, I already feel a wee bit better just having told somebody (who didn't laugh, or patronise me) about it.

I think maybe you should have a chat with your doctor - don't leave it like I did. Depression is quite common with diabetes. You aren't a failure, neither am I, we just need a bit of sympathy and support. :thumbup:

Ju
 
SweetHeart said:
Lucy,

(((((( HUGE HUGS ))))))

It sounds like you have mild depression. I can empathise with the weepiness etc, I'm going through it myself. I'm not diabetic, but I started low carbing when my husband was diagnosed and it's a slow road for me too....like I get near the goal and someone moves the goalposts!

I've suffered with depression for 18 years. I used to be able to cope with it myself, just appearing a bit withdrawn to everyone else. Lately we've had a lot of things to deal with, some real lemons, and I haven't been able to cope. Lots of tears, huge feelings of failure - all of the things you're probably familiar with. Two weeks ago I plucked up the courage to speak to the new lady GP at our surgery and, although I'm not on any antidepressants, I already feel a wee bit better just having told somebody (who didn't laugh, or patronise me) about it.

I think maybe you should have a chat with your doctor - don't leave it like I did. Depression is quite common with diabetes. You aren't a failure, neither am I, we just need a bit of sympathy and support. :thumbup:

Ju
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Thanks Ju! Hope you are feeling better too...........(((X)))
 
Doesn't it just make you wonder how many of us are walking around putting on a brave face most of the time but now and then
just feeling that its all too much. Sometimes we know why and at other times its nothing specific - it just all becomes too much.
We look at others and they all seem so oblivious and happy and to be coping so well!

Don't be fooled. Many of us are living on the edge. I don' have any answers but anyone who feels this way has my sympathy and empathy and should know they are definiely not alone.
 
(((Lucy))) You know what? I cried like a baby the day of diagnosis, and on this forum as well. Since then I have not shed a single tear, so determined this won't beat me. Neither approach is wrong, sometimes we just need to allow our emotions to flow, and other times we need to use our pain and hurt, and turn it into determination. It just depends how it grabs you. I am doggedly determined, and when I put my mind to something, nothing on earth will move me, that's how I have approached diabetes. Other things have me just a complete puddle of tears you could wring out like a sponge.

I hope you feel better soon, I know that when you feel very low, the tiniest thing can seem like and mountain placed in your path. I have never suffered with depression, so don't want to comment as I could accidentally put my size 9's in it, as I truly have no idea what it's like. But no matter what, I honestly do hope you feel stronger soonest.

Hugs - Joanna.
 
Unbeliever said:
Doesn't it just make you wonder how many of us are walking around putting on a brave face most of the time but now and then
just feeling that its all too much. Sometimes we know why and at other times its nothing specific - it just all becomes too much.
We look at others and they all seem so oblivious and happy and to be coping so well!

Don't be fooled. Many of us are living on the edge. I don' have any answers but anyone who feels this way has my sympathy and empathy and should know they are definiely not alone.
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Thanks Unbeliever......You are so right, though some of us have more to be down about than others and when I think how lucky I am I have no reason to feel like this. I just need a kick up the rear and Ill be OK again. I think sometimes crying is like a safety valve that just sometimes just needs to be released.

You are a star for having to deal with all that you have going on, and you always have time, support, sympathy, empathy and wise words for others. Thank you so much for saying that we are not alone :)

I think I know a little of why I am feeling like this at the moment. My mum died when I was 7, my little boy is approaching 7 and I have been thinking about my mum alot recently. I suppose I want to nail this diabetes control so that he has me healthy for a long time. I am being impatient as I want my HBA1C down NOW THIS MINUET and know that I just have to keep chipping away to get it down.

I feel better for admitting it!

Thanks again.....xxx
 
Defren said:
(((Lucy))) You know what? I cried like a baby the day of diagnosis, and on this forum as well. Since then I have not shed a single tear, so determined this won't beat me. Neither approach is wrong, sometimes we just need to allow our emotions to flow, and other times we need to use our pain and hurt, and turn it into determination. It just depends how it grabs you. I am doggedly determined, and when I put my mind to something, nothing on earth will move me, that's how I have approached diabetes. Other things have me just a complete puddle of tears you could wring out like a sponge.

I hope you feel better soon, I know that when you feel very low, the tiniest thing can seem like and mountain placed in your path. I have never suffered with depression, so don't want to comment as I could accidentally put my size 9's in it, as I truly have no idea what it's like. But no matter what, I honestly do hope you feel stronger soonest.

Hugs - Joanna.
Click to expand...

Thanks Jo. If you read my reply to Unbeliever you will see that Ive kind of worked out why Ive been feeling like this. I do have some of that fighting spirit in me that I so admire in you, and you have awakened it in me. Thank you. Tommorow is a new day! :)

Lucy xxx
 
shop said:
Defren said:
(((Lucy))) You know what? I cried like a baby the day of diagnosis, and on this forum as well. Since then I have not shed a single tear, so determined this won't beat me. Neither approach is wrong, sometimes we just need to allow our emotions to flow, and other times we need to use our pain and hurt, and turn it into determination. It just depends how it grabs you. I am doggedly determined, and when I put my mind to something, nothing on earth will move me, that's how I have approached diabetes. Other things have me just a complete puddle of tears you could wring out like a sponge.

I hope you feel better soon, I know that when you feel very low, the tiniest thing can seem like and mountain placed in your path. I have never suffered with depression, so don't want to comment as I could accidentally put my size 9's in it, as I truly have no idea what it's like. But no matter what, I honestly do hope you feel stronger soonest.

Hugs - Joanna.
Click to expand...

Thanks Jo. If you read my reply to Unbeliever you will see that Ive kind of worked out why Ive been feeling like this. I do have some of that fighting spirit in me that I so admire in you, and you have awakened it in me. Thank you. Tommorow is a new day! :)

Lucy xxx
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I did read your reply, and it made perfect sense. To project the terrible events of your own childhood onto your child, and that of course makes you consider your own mortality. HOWEVER young lady :D You "only" have diabetes, so you're not going anywhere just yet! I say only because as you know, the right management of your condition, and there is nothing to suppose you won't live a long, happy and healthy life.

Diabetes saved me, it made me completely re-evaluate my life and give myself a kick up the bum. Am I obsessed? You bet your boots I am, but my obsession is giving me that strength.

Tomorrow is another day love, and while I am likely old enough to be your mom, please believe me when I say, it scares the hell out of me too, but, it won the battle by invading my pancreas, but I will win the war. (((Lucy))) xx
 
Defren said:
shop said:
Defren said:
(((Lucy))) You know what? I cried like a baby the day of diagnosis, and on this forum as well. Since then I have not shed a single tear, so determined this won't beat me. Neither approach is wrong, sometimes we just need to allow our emotions to flow, and other times we need to use our pain and hurt, and turn it into determination. It just depends how it grabs you. I am doggedly determined, and when I put my mind to something, nothing on earth will move me, that's how I have approached diabetes. Other things have me just a complete puddle of tears you could wring out like a sponge.

I hope you feel better soon, I know that when you feel very low, the tiniest thing can seem like and mountain placed in your path. I have never suffered with depression, so don't want to comment as I could accidentally put my size 9's in it, as I truly have no idea what it's like. But no matter what, I honestly do hope you feel stronger soonest.

Hugs - Joanna.
Click to expand...

Thanks Jo. If you read my reply to Unbeliever you will see that Ive kind of worked out why Ive been feeling like this. I do have some of that fighting spirit in me that I so admire in you, and you have awakened it in me. Thank you. Tommorow is a new day! :)

Lucy xxx
Click to expand...


I did read your reply, and it made perfect sense. To project the terrible events of your own childhood onto your child, and that of course makes you consider your own mortality. HOWEVER young lady :D You "only" have diabetes, so you're not going anywhere just yet! I say only because as you know, the right management of your condition, and there is nothing to suppose you won't live a long, happy and healthy life.

Diabetes saved me, it made me completely re-evaluate my life and give myself a kick up the bum. Am I obsessed? You bet your boots I am, but my obsession is giving me that strength.

Tomorrow is another day love, and while I am likely old enough to be your mom, please believe me when I say, it scares the hell out of me too, but, it won the battle by invading my pancreas, but I will win the war. (((Lucy))) xx
Click to expand...

Thanks Jo, I do know what you mean..xxx
 
I wanted to send you a hug, so:
20050801_elephant20hug.gif


Sometimes you have to let yourself have a weepy day, I don't think anyone would expect someone to just cope with everything that diabetes brings.
Put really frankly diabetes sucks a huge....well it really sucks.
I struggle with depression and anxiety and when I was told quite how bad the diabetes was I just totally withdrew for a while; I hated the diagnoses, I hated the doctors for not seeing it sooner and I hated myself because I felt that it was totally my fault.
I won't get too into detail, but yeah...I was not happy.

I hope you feel a bit better today, if you ever need a chat or a rant or anything you're more than welcome to PM me.
-BF xo~
 
Aww BIG, BIG HUGS!!!!!!! to you

Sorry your feeling down just now, but after reading all the replies to your post and what words of wisdom, sympathy and empathy,I don't know if there is much that I can add, except to say that it will pass, and as you have a fighting spirit, you'll come back stronger.

I'v been there and there are some days, I feel so down and weepy I would cry at the drop of a hat. Don't know why but there it is. :(

Although your fears around your little boy's age and the loss of your mum is very real for you, it's not going to happen to him. Don't dwell on this.

Youv found this great support site and your taking control of your condition, so upward and onward. :clap:

All the best Kate :wink:
 
Dear Lucy,
One extra thought from a non-weepy man! I always find hypos mess me up for hours afterwards as they shake up the hormones, and one inevitable result is I end up in tears for no reason. Had to explain to secretaries to ignore if sometimes I have tears streaming down my face! That's not to say that we don't all have diabetic downs at times that give us plenty of reason to well up -- but the hypo may also have been tipping you over the edge post-hypo without your realising it.
 
Hope your feeling much better today Lucy, carb counting and getting the right insulin ratio's taking into account exercise, stress, illness, hormones etc takes time so stick with it.
 
Hi Lucy

you are not alone in your struggles...i have been trying to low carb for a couple of months but i just cannot manage it or i am good for a week, but cant see much improvement in bloods etc...so i go on a major bender and overindulge in carbs..it is a vicious circle but one i am determined to break one way or the other. just need to keep trying - cause giving up is much worse...one day we ll get it right....

take care
Claudette
 
shop said:
Hi Folkes,

Feel a bit silly writing this but sused if anyone is going to know how I am feeling is likely to be one of you guys. Carb Counting is going ok. Seem to be going in the right direction albeit slowly.

Anyway had my 1st hypo in 2 weeks this morning ( absolutely no reason for it, as I had my snack before bed ) which has been giving me good morning readings. I also had a reasonable practice nurse appt yesterday. ( so nothing to complain about there apart from as I already know my HBA1C needs to come down )

I spoke to one of the Mums at school who is aware that I have been having probs recently, she didnt know that I have been T1 for 6 yrs ( I have kept it under wraps to avoid drawing attention to myself and making a fuss, all part of being in denial ) She said that one of the other mums has just been diagnosed, " but has pretty good control!! I was going to offer support but actualy feel like I would be a negative impact right now as I am feeling sooo down, and she seems to be OK!

I am feeling soooo down, cant stop crying and feel a failure, pathetic I know! I am really keen to get to grips with this carb counting but feel like the goal I am trying to achieve is Soooo far away.

Lucy :(

Anyway just wanted a moan coz if anyone is going to understand you guys will.
Click to expand...

Hi Lucy Firstly dont listen to gossip in the playground, is the pther mum a DSN then, probably not. I don't make a big thing about my diabetes, never have done, and its not because I'm in denial, I'm just not in people faces with my diabetes, only the people that count and really matter. Most people probably feel like you do at some point, its only natural. Moan away, we are all in the same boat after all aren't we. Take care and try and have a good day. Best wishes to you. ps I carb count and when I first started I was so confused and thought I would never get the hang of it, but I did ( well, most of the time) :)
 
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