I'm another heart attack guy who burned out a bit from dealing with diabetes.
These days I don't test and just keep my carbs as low as possible: it's not that much of a burden to be honest. You don't have to be super motivated, and it's not a case of being either really gung ho about tackling your diabetes, or completely lax: you can just avoid carbs where possible, do exercise where possible, and still get decent averages in the Hba1c etc. It doesn't need to be all or nothing. I take my meds and do a blood panel every 3 months: it's not really a big impact on day to day life.
I totally get the depression side of things too, but again, it doesn't need to be so grandiose: guitar and PS5 sounds like a good time: you've got Witcher 4 to look forward to. Maybe take a bit of pressure off yourself and take it day by day.