• Guest - w'd love to know what you think about the forum! Take the 2025 Survey »

You will have to pay the meal price!

Munkki

Well-Known Member
Messages
544
Type of diabetes
Type 2
Treatment type
Diet only
Hi all,

I believe with diabetes type 2 I have to be somewhat patient when eating out in restaurants, cafes etc. and put up with paying a bit more, having potatoes swapped for, say, a single champignon or nothing. Today was one of those days when I reached my limit. I went to a University cafe, felt like I was rushed through different queues, before I found myself standing in front of the warm food counter. After quickly scanning the items, I asked for sausages and green beans. Well, I had to pay the whole meal price for these two small sausages, so I paid for potatoes, Yorkies and gravy, and had to pay extra for beans and butter. I ended up with this little box, leaving me hungry after two hours.

I mean, I understand when waiters in a restaurant do not know much about diabetes, and I am usually happy to explain, suggest, tolerate or tip for any extra effort. In this cafe, however, these prices are systematically set - and I felt discriminated against. I was so angry, and felt so powerless, and disrespected by that woman and the cafe. I wrote a complaint email, but I wonder whether there are any guidelines, laws, or so against this type of discrimination. This is not about losing out on an add-chips-for-1-£ offer. This is about paying quite a lot more - and not having a proper meal, because I am ill.
 
Can't speak for other countries, but here in the US, you (or "we" for that matter) don't have a case.

I don't see it as anyone's fault quite frankly. I respect that owners are trying to run an honest business and asking them to cater to my specific needs without paying a premium is unreasonable.

Some businesses will go to extra lengths to earn my business and I have a lot of respect for those that do, but those that don't aren't necessarily being jerks. They may just not have a business model that can accomodate unusual requests.

Long story short: if you're unhappy with how you were treated....then don't eat there anymore.
 

Do you consider yourself to be ill, as you have been diagnosed as having diabetes?
 
Speaking only for myself, I expect to pay the full price for whatever they give me. If it's a bad deal I either won't go there again or, if I have no choice but to eat there regularly (as at uni or a works canteen), I will go to the top and explain to the catering manager or whomever what I want and why. I don't expect counter staff to take decisions like that.
I don't think of myself as ill. But I am responsible for how I cope with my T2 and if I get caught out it's my job to deal with it. I'm quite proud when I manage to do this, not being a very pushy person normally.
 
I'm confused. Did the meal not have vegetables included? They normally do, so was it just the potatoes and yorkies that came with it? I've got to be honest here, I think you are overreacting, accusing them of discrimination - how are they discriminating? They have no responsibility to cater for your specific need and as it's a set menu, so they are under no obligation to change it because you want them to, although occasionally eateries can be flexible. I'm also unsure of how you are ill?

Maybe best to eat elsewhere in future I would have thought.
 
I had a similar experience yesterday at a lunch meeting with clients.

I ordered what I felt to be the healthiest option for me, but it came with chips, so I asked for a side salad instead of chips. My clients who had flown in from New York followed my lead and asked for variations of other dishes on the menu and the waiting staff were very happy to oblige, substituting chips for couscous for one of them.

I certainly didn't expect or ask for a discount but was incredibly grateful that the restaurant had been so flexible and helpful. Nor do I consider myself ill. Quite the contrary, I am fit and healthy primarily because of my food choices and the lifestyle changes I've made to manage my condition.
 
If a meal comes with a certain format (meat, veg, potato, gravy, yorkshire) at a set price, then anything 'diifferent' is causing hassle to the staff concerned.

It may not look like hassle from the customer's point of view, but when you take into account that there could be a queue building, that talking about it is taking time, that the staff on the till will need to do calculations, look up prices, and/or have the situation explained to them... it all adds up.

I love it when staff listen, care and are willing to make adjustments, but I have no expectation that it will happen.
IF it does, I make sure they know my appreciation, and I tip generously.
IF NOT, I ALWAYS have a 9bar holstered in my handbag as a fall back option.

I think using the word 'discrimination' in this scenario is inappropriate.
 
I was visiting my mother in hospital, and with my sister went to the staff café, I ordered the chilli as there was nothing else, I was asked if I wanted the rice or chips with it, I said no as I was diabetic. 'And' the woman serving said! I was charged for rice and chilli.
Just saying.
 
AndBreathe said:
Do you consider yourself to be ill, as you have been diagnosed as having diabetes?
Click to expand...

I echo your reply

Having only recently been diagnosed six weeks as type two, I do not see myself with an illness, It is more that I have a condition that has to be managed and controlled. It is the same with my mental illness of thirty years, that again I do not see myself as ill, yes I do suffer with severe depression, and suicidal thoughts, but these conditions need treatment and management. To me saying I have an illness "smacks" of "poor me" wanting sympathy and special treatment. I dont want any of that. I just want to get on with my life and "manage" it along the way. Personally I am far happier with the Diabetes than other ailments, because that is more in my day to day control, I feel that I control it not that it controls me
 
Thanks for your opinions. I am glad my post inspired such a variety of topics. Let me add my thoughts, a day later.

I feel much calmer tonight, and I do not consider this a big deal any more, also due to what some of you wrote. I do not feel 'wronged' as much any more. I do not agree with a University cafe serving an unbalanced meal and operating in such a business-like manner. However, I did what I could and am willing to let go of this now. I believe I behaved respectfully in the cafe and the complaint email I wrote was brief, friendly, unemotional and constructive. I did not rant anywhere else, other than in this forum, where I finally let off the steam. Today I brought my own lunch again, which was much enjoyed.

Regarding the wording, the pricing in the cafe is price discrimination, in a marketing and economics sense. A 3-for-2 offer is price discrimination too. This is different from, say, discriminating against race or religion, and I did not mean to set these equal.

I was wrong when I wrote about illness above. Diabetes is a disease and I am actually very healthy. First, when I read the replies, I thought it is just wording, but it is not as simple. There have been many changes in my life, and I have been somewhat frustrated that the b***y diabetes is still there, although quite well managed during the last few weeks. I know that, mostly, I appear strong to others, and believe I have presented myself as strong in this forum in the past, but I am just human and the diabetes reminds me of the fact that I am not invincible. My usual approach is to bring my own lunch, seek out other options, pay more for my food, etc. etc. I am not sure what exactly triggered my emotional reaction yesterday. One thing I could have done, and was too proud to do was to be more honest and tell the serving lady that I was confused and wanted to have either some help or time to browse the available food options. Sometimes I need to remind myself that others might see a tall, athletic, slim (add any nice words here ) woman, when actually I feel small, insecure and vulnerable. It is then up to me to ask for what need or show some vulnerability, as appropriate. When I am then rejected, I need to live with it, but at least I tried.
 
An honest and thoughtful post Munkki - I'm glad to hear you're feeling a bit better today. We all have **** days and occasionally, just one thing can push us over the edge, don't worry yourself about it. I very much relate to the point about vulnerability, and when one is used to putting on the front, it's not that easy to show what's really going on inside.

I think you have done pretty damned well to be able to think through yesterday and not get upset by what was said here, it could have easily gone the other way. Seeing as I don't know you, I can't add comments about appearance etc, but I do however think you could add thoughtful and honest to your list of nice words (as pointed out above lol).
 

Is diabetes an illness?

Well, I get free prescriptions for life now, so someone in charge thinks it is.
 
Munkki said:
One thing I could have done, and was too proud to do was to be more honest and tell the serving lady that I was confused and wanted to have either some help or time to browse the available food options
Click to expand...
Hindsight. Dontcha hate it? It's infuriatingly right so often.
Good post there, more honest than I might be in that situation, if I'm honest.
 
Went to Morrisons one morning, ordered breakfast. Couldn't order 2 fried eggs, 2 sausages and mushrooms as a breakfast. They turned up on three plates, not even simultaneously. At least Sainsbury's managed to get it on the same plate. Wetherspoon's on the other hand, was more than happy to tweak.

After dinner at a pub put me in hospital for eight days, I decided that eating out can be risky. If I have to eat while out, I buy coffee and nip into a supermarket for some prawns.
 
Whilst may restaurants u deer stand the concept of diabetics needed to restrict sweet, sugary foods, many do not fully understand how Type 2 is managed with a very low carb diet. To a chef a couple of new potatoes would be seen as a healthy form of complex carbs, not realising that it would still increase your blood sugar significantly.

I have quite a small appetite and therefore avoid carbs when eating out, preferring to eat lots of lovely veg instead of pasta or potatoes. I usually just ask the waitress if I can substitute my chips or potatoes with a salad - it has never been an issue.
 
SunnyExpat said:
Is diabetes an illness?

Well, I get free prescriptions for life now, so someone in charge thinks it is.
Click to expand...

Erm,........... Rather a leap there on prescriptions.

I have never, ever received free prescription, for diabetes or anything else, except when I was a child. I guess, once I cross the upper age threshold I will qualify for free prescriptions, but that will be nothing to do with anything I may have been diagnosed with.

Excemption from prescription charges only applies where medication is prescribed, and is only for specific, potentially renewable, periods, not for life. For T1s, I do concede this could effectively equate to free for life, but who knows what the future brings.

So, are you suggesting diabetics taking medication are ill whereas others aren't ill enough to merit supported care?
 


If you need to have a distinction between 'ill' or not, I'm sure you have an opinion.
I don't like labeling these things, it isn't really required.
As I said though, other people do.
 
SunnyExpat said:
If you need to have a distinction between 'ill' or not, I'm sure you have an opinion.
I don't like labeling these things, it isn't really required.
As I said though, other people do.
Click to expand...

I need no distinction. I'm not ill, and have never suggested I was. Your post suggested you feel that due to your free prescriptions you are ill.

But, I won't derail this thread any further.
 
Fair enough, I don't feel the need to use labels, 'ill', or 'not ill', but I would guess diabetes may well be classed as an illness by some in the medical profession.
But you're right, it is de-railing the thread.
 
Thanks for your lovely reactions. I got a piece of insider information today, from fellow low-carber. You can buy the jacket potato fillings separately, so there is hope in case I do not manage to sort out my lunch box
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Menu
Log in
Register
Cookies are required to use this site. You must accept them to continue using the site. Learn More.…