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Coping with comments

Jellyb

Active Member
Messages
33
Type of diabetes
Type 2
Treatment type
Diet only
I was diagnosed Type 2 about nine weeks ago. I feel like I am coping reasonably well - trying to adjust my diet and increasing exercise. The hardest thing for me is the comments from family and friends. They have included - 'Well you are too fat anyway' and 'Oh, that's the good type' and 'Just stop eating chocolate and you will be ok'

The final straw has come today when my Dad has shared a link on facebook on how Diabetes can be cured - even Type 1. His partner recently sent me a text to ask my level when I was diagnosed. She said her doctor has suggested she be tested but she has decided against being tested. They obviously don't think it's much to worry about :(

Thank goodness I have people in my life who are supportive and giving me the motivation to carry on!

I
 
Yes I agree keep sharing here, we've all been there and actually understand what this feels like. :)

So welcome to the forum from me :) and I'm tagging @daisy1 so that she can give you your very own welcome info - I'm sure you've read it elsewhere but it's nice to have your own too:)
 
Yes I agree keep sharing here, we've all been there and actually understand what this feels like. :)

So welcome to the forum from me :) and I'm tagging @daisy1 so that she can give you your very own welcome info - I'm sure you've read it elsewhere but it's nice to have your own too:)

Hello Jellyb and welcome to the forum:)

Here is the information @zand is referring to and I hope you will find it useful. Ask all the questions you need to and someone will help.

BASIC INFORMATION FOR NEWLY DIAGNOSED DIABETICS

Diabetes is the general term to describe people who have blood that is sweeter than normal. A number of different types of diabetes exist.

A diagnosis of diabetes tends to be a big shock for most of us. It’s far from the end of the world though and on this forum you’ll find over 100,000 people who are demonstrating this.

On the forum we have found that with the number of new people being diagnosed with diabetes each day, sometimes the NHS is not being able to give all the advice it would perhaps like to deliver - particularly with regards to people with type 2 diabetes.

The role of carbohydrate

Carbohydrates are a factor in diabetes because they ultimately break down into sugar (glucose) within our blood. We then need enough insulin to either convert the blood sugar into energy for our body, or to store the blood sugar as body fat.

If the amount of carbohydrate we take in is more than our body’s own (or injected) insulin can cope with, then our blood sugar will rise.

The bad news

Research indicates that raised blood sugar levels over a period of years can lead to organ damage, commonly referred to as diabetic complications.

The good news

People on the forum here have shown that there is plenty of opportunity to keep blood sugar levels from going too high. It’s a daily task but it’s within our reach and it’s well worth the effort.

Controlling your carbs

The info below is primarily aimed at people with type 2 diabetes, however, it may also be of benefit for other types of diabetes as well.
There are two approaches to controlling your carbs:

  • Reduce your carbohydrate intake
  • Choose ‘better’ carbohydrates

Reduce your carbohydrates

A large number of people on this forum have chosen to reduce the amount of carbohydrates they eat as they have found this to be an effective way of improving (lowering) their blood sugar levels.

The carbohydrates which tend to have the most pronounced effect on blood sugar levels tend to be starchy carbohydrates such as rice, pasta, bread, potatoes and similar root vegetables, flour based products (pastry, cakes, biscuits, battered food etc) and certain fruits.

Choosing better carbohydrates

Another option is to replace ‘white carbohydrates’ (such as white bread, white rice, white flour etc) with whole grain varieties. The idea behind having whole grain varieties is that the carbohydrates get broken down slower than the white varieties –and these are said to have a lower glycaemic index.
http://www.diabetes.co.uk/food/diabetes-and-whole-grains.html

The low glycaemic index diet is often favoured by healthcare professionals but some people with diabetes find that low GI does not help their blood sugar enough and may wish to cut out these foods altogether.

Read more on carbohydrates and diabetes

Eating what works for you

Different people respond differently to different types of food. What works for one person may not work so well for another. The best way to see which foods are working for you is to test your blood sugar with a glucose meter.

To be able to see what effect a particular type of food or meal has on your blood sugar is to do a test before the meal and then test after the meal. A test 2 hours after the meal gives a good idea of how your body has reacted to the meal.

The blood sugar ranges recommended by NICE are as follows:

Blood glucose ranges for type 2 diabetes
  • Before meals: 4 to 7 mmol/l
  • 2 hours after meals: under 8.5 mmol/l
Blood glucose ranges for type 1 diabetes (adults)
  • Before meals: 4 to 7 mmol/l
  • 2 hours after meals: under 9 mmol/l
Blood glucose ranges for type 1 diabetes (children)
  • Before meals: 4 to 8 mmol/l
  • 2 hours after meals: under 10 mmol/l
However, those that are able to, may wish to keep blood sugar levels below the NICE after meal targets.

Access to blood glucose test strips

The NICE guidelines suggest that people newly diagnosed with type 2 diabetes should be offered:

  • structured education to every person and/or their carer at and around the time of diagnosis, with annual reinforcement and review
  • self-monitoring of plasma glucose to a person newly diagnosed with type 2 diabetes only as an integral part of his or her self-management education

Therefore both structured education and self-monitoring of blood glucose should be offered to people with type 2 diabetes. Read more on getting access to bloodglucose testing supplies.

You may also be interested to read questions to ask at a diabetic clinic

Note: This post has been edited from Sue/Ken's post to include up to date information.
 
You're in good company on here. Everyone is so supportive.

You'll get used to the negative comments.

Might be worth leaving some realistic information/leaflets and books lying around for your family and friends to read! ;)
 
Thank you all. It's great to have somewhere where people actually understand what it's all about. After I posted this morning - my friend texted me and in our conversation she said how it was not a big deal, she knew this because her father had been diabetic for many years and he lived a normal life, eating what he wanted when he wanted.
I also received my first appt for the diabetic clinic at the GP surgery so I think this should help me quite a lot.
 
I believe you'll find that as you get more used to copying with this disease and gain confidence through managing your levels, you will also grow more thick skinned and learn to pay less attention to people's comments.

To be honest, I do not even blame them anymore for being ignorant or misinformed about a medical condition they do not have themselves and about which there is often so much negative, over simplistic and sensationalist publicity in the press.

After all, how much do I really know about a lot of other conditions that I luckily do not suffer from.

These days, with most people, I just smile and nod, when they make what I consider to be stupid comments about diabetes. I will only set people right if they are someone I actually care about and matters to me.

As far as I am concerned, this is my medical condition to manage and what anyone else comes out with about it is just irrelevant, unless that person happen's to be medically trained or to suffer from the condition himself.

Pavlos
 
I was diagnosed Type 2 about nine weeks ago. I feel like I am coping reasonably well - trying to adjust my diet and increasing exercise. The hardest thing for me is the comments from family and friends. They have included - 'Well you are too fat anyway' and 'Oh, that's the good type' and 'Just stop eating chocolate and you will be ok'

The final straw has come today when my Dad has shared a link on facebook on how Diabetes can be cured - even Type 1. His partner recently sent me a text to ask my level when I was diagnosed. She said her doctor has suggested she be tested but she has decided against being tested. They obviously don't think it's much to worry about :(

Thank goodness I have people in my life who are supportive and giving me the motivation to carry on!

I
Hi @Jellyb and welcome to the forum.

You can either ignore the stupid comments or get upset and I assure you that the former is the best thing to do.
People only take the trouble to find out about chronic conditions and illnesses if it affects them personally and so we can forgive the majority of people who latch on to some comment in a newspaper or a snake oil salesman promising a cure.

You can manage this condition and your health will improve and then you will be able to tell people how you did it and bore them to death as much as they have done to you. It is called revenge.;)

There is a thread that you might like to look at and it will show you that other people have felt exactly the same as you.

Don't involve yourself in the blame game.
http://www.diabetes.co.uk/forum/threads/dont-involve-yourself-in-the-blame-game.21894/
 
Hello jellyb! It is hard. But ignore the silly comments- have a good read around here and ask questions, trust me, once you have the knowledge you become empowered and in control!!
 
I have actually practised a little retaliatory comment, for the next time someone says something like that to me:

'No wonder we have a diabetes epidemic in this country, if that is the kind of information that people are being given!'
(I intend to roll my eyes and sound exasperated)​

Unfortunately, no one has said anything silly to me for ages, so I haven't been able to use it yet. ;)
 
More comments yesterday at work.
Should you be drinking that? i'm asking as a friend.
Boss taking in donuts for everybody to eat at team meeting. Concerned whether a Muslim colleague could eat them!
Other colleague saying her brother is Type 2 and eats what he likes.
Other half - eat this, don't eat that. Exercise more....


I know I'm being unreasonable but at the moment - everybody is an expert...
 
Hi, Jellyb. Welcome to the Forum,:)
I sometimes say something without thinking, however that is no excuse for being nasty as well.
You will get lots of friends and nice advice from this great Forum.
 
I have actually practised a little retaliatory comment, for the next time someone says something like that to me:

'No wonder we have a diabetes epidemic in this country, if that is the kind of information that people are being given!'
(I intend to roll my eyes and sound exasperated)​

Unfortunately, no one has said anything silly to me for ages, so I haven't been able to use it yet. ;)
Unfortunately, no one has said anything silly to me for ages,
Apart from me :););)
 
I was diagnosed Type 2 about nine weeks ago. I feel like I am coping reasonably well - trying to adjust my diet and increasing exercise. The hardest thing for me is the comments from family and friends. They have included - 'Well you are too fat anyway' and 'Oh, that's the good type' and 'Just stop eating chocolate and you will be ok'

The final straw has come today when my Dad has shared a link on facebook on how Diabetes can be cured - even Type 1. His partner recently sent me a text to ask my level when I was diagnosed. She said her doctor has suggested she be tested but she has decided against being tested. They obviously don't think it's much to worry about :(

Thank goodness I have people in my life who are supportive and giving me the motivation to carry on!

I
When I was first diagnosed I had a similar deal from colleagues who thought my lchf diet was dangerous. When I hypoed at work I was sent home and told to sort myself out. I am almost 4 stone lighter and my bs has halved. Do I still eat lchf? Yes I do. Have I reduced my metformin by 2/3? Er yes! Who's laughing now!
Have a look at www.dietdoctor.com
It might inspire you and the best bit is the yummy food plus the science if you can be bothered to print it off and rub their noses in it!
 
If I may suggest, it is worth trying to look beyond the comments at the motive of the person making them.

Some comments, although misinformed and inaccurate, are well intentioned and made out of genuine concern.

Others may not be so innocent, but even so still best ignored.

After all they are more revealing of the ignorance of the person making them than anything else.
 
I understand that some people are well intentioned - however it feels like this particular colleague is using my diagnosis to open the floodgates and tell me everything about my life she wants to comment on. I couldn't believe my ears when she told me she knew that I was diabetic months ago! The latest comment was one about my hair. She said I touch my hair a lot and she felt like coming over and slapping my hand away. Some days I feel like hiding from her or telling her to mind her own business when she asks me a hundred questions about what I am eating and why I am eating it!
I'm just going to have to develop a thicker skin and just smile at these people when they are driving me up the wall!
 
Best to ignore silly uneducated comments. I am not type 2, but recently had an accident and the number of people who said, 'oh well at least it's not your right hand ' ( I'm right handed) or "try to exercise the wrist more", even though I had severe complications set in :arghh: :banghead: it's exasperating at times.
Remember, 'Those that matter wont mind and those that mind don't matter";) As nearly everyone has to have an opinion these days !!

Best wishes RRB
 
Thank you all for your comments. It's such a relief to be able to talk to people who really understand and already have the tee shirts to prove it :):):)
 
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