Type 1 Confidence issues with Diabetes

TonySleigh

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Hi, I'm type 1 diabetic which was diagnosed in 1973 at the age of 7. I generally keep fit, eat well (no junk food) and only drink about 8-10 units of alcohol per week. I also have recently played drums in a band but decided to leave as I was having too many hypos and was affecting my concentration and the fear of having hypos was always at the back of my mind. Not only in the band but also at work.

As I have got older my lack of confidence is getting worse, I also live on my own and nervous to go on a date as I have also been rejected a couple of times because of my condition and would rather not put myself in that position.
The good news is that I am now going through the process of having an insulin pump which will hopefully stabilise my blood sugars.

I just wondered if there are any other diabetics going through the same confidence issues caused by their condition or is it just me?
 

himtoo

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why can't everyone get on........
Hi Tony
welcome to the forum:)

I can completely empathise with the feelings you describe but weirdly i have found my confidence has grown
as I age.
I was shy and hid my diabetes from everyone as a teen and young adult but in the last 10 years with the advent of the internet and social media and the general PC correctness in society I stand up for myself , I openly inject in public ( and test ) and I tell everybody not quick enough to get out of earshot all about my Diabetes.:D

How great that you play the drums -- i will tag my metal vocalist friend @Jaylee - he rocks for sure !!

also -- to let you know you are not alone with the ignorance of non D's in the dating scene
have a read of this old topic -- should bring a smile or 2
http://www.diabetes.co.uk/forum/threads/worst-date-ever.70764/

and finally -- i just started on a pump a week ago -- my hypo awareness is erratic so hopefully the pump will assist me in lessening hypos too !!
 
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RuthW

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I didn't have such severe confidence problems after my mid-thirties. But when I got a pump a year ago (early fifties), my confidence soared. It was really difficult for the first six months but I gradually learned how to use it well, and having the ability to manage my diabetes so well (finally) has been a huge boost to both my mood and confidence. Good luck with yours.
 
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Jaylee

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Hi @TonySleigh

Sorry to hear yer confidence rocked (no pun intended.) by the D.

Looking at your profile. We have similar things in common. Both a T1 of the 70s/similar age/& believe it or not, in ocupational experience too..!

I'm still active at weekends singing in two bands. One outfit also with a T1 bass player. (We have our D "in house" humour.) & i work full time..


So, if you fancy a chat or swap tales of rock & roll? (Tips & tricks staying "sane" on the road with Diabetes.) Let me know.. :cool:
 
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TonySleigh

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Celery, Wine bars, snazzy restaurants,
I really appreciate your replies.. Its great to hear from people with similar experiences and how you deal with them. Its sounds like RuthW had the same problems I'm going through...its only because the hypos have been a major issue and destroyed my confidence so I'm too hoping that I'll regain it once I am settled on a pump and hypos become less often.. Thank you for that RuthW..:) x. I haven't yet hung up my drum sticks as I'm not going to let this condition beat me... I will take you up on your offer Jaylee...would be good to swap tales. Let me know how you get on with the pump Himtoo. I'm just looking forward to getting me sorted... Thanks again for your comments and advice...:)
 
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TorqPenderloin

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Are you struggling with the hypos themselves, or are you struggling with the fear of having a hypo?
Also, what do you mean when you say "I don't want to put myself in that position."

I ask because it almost sounds like you're dealing with something other than self-confidence issues.
 

TonySleigh

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Type 1
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Insulin
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Celery, Wine bars, snazzy restaurants,
Are you struggling with the hypos themselves, or are you struggling with the fear of having a hypo?
Also, what do you mean when you say "I don't want to put myself in that position."

I ask because it almost sounds like you're dealing with something other than self-confidence issues.

i struggle with the fear of having hypos. I am generally a confident person, outgoing etc but I'll avoid situations if I think a hypo can cause embarrassment. Currently I feel the diabetes is controlling me rather than me controlling it. Thats why I decided to go for the pump option..
 
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himtoo

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why can't everyone get on........
Hi Tony
you have been D for a long time and know the issues -- is the fear a rational or irrational one.?

I hate hypos and have had a few that qualify for the "premier league" but I don't fear them. Instead I plan the best I can to avoid them but if 1 happens I can't not live just in case.
again a link to lots of us talking about "worst hypos" -- should hopefully help to let you know you are not alone and ALL of us have had an issue from time to time.

http://www.diabetes.co.uk/forum/threads/worst-place.70338/
 
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TonySleigh

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Hi Tony
you have been D for a long time and know the issues -- is the fear a rational or irrational one.?

I hate hypos and have had a few that qualify for the "premier league" but I don't fear them. Instead I plan the best I can to avoid them but if 1 happens I can't not live just in case.
again a link to lots of us talking about "worst hypos" -- should hopefully help to let you know you are not alone and ALL of us have had an issue from time to time.

http://www.diabetes.co.uk/forum/threads/worst-place.70338/
Many thanks Himtoo. I've just completed the hypo awareness program on here which I've learnt a couple of useful things. Your absolutely right...I must get out of this 'can't not live just in case attitude'. I think overtime you are constantly bombarded with the dangers of constant high blood sugars and try to keep them as near normal as possible with the consequences of regular hypos which in itself is also dangerous. In my younger days my control was awful which I'm sure is a common story with diabetics in the 70's, this has resulted in retinopathy, partial loss of sight in my left eye due to a hemorrhage and loss of some kidney function but over the last 20ish years I made a real effort to control myself and thankfully has paid off but just need to get over this hurdle of Hypos.
 
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ButtterflyLady

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I think when it comes to dating, if someone rejects you because of diabetes, I'd consider that a lucky escape. I wouldn't want to be in a relationship with someone who would think like that. There are plenty more fish in the sea, decent, accepting fish. ;)
 
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TonySleigh

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Celery, Wine bars, snazzy restaurants,
I think when it comes to dating, if someone rejects you because of diabetes, I'd consider that a lucky escape. I wouldn't want to be in a relationship with someone who would think like that. There are plenty more fish in the sea, decent, accepting fish. ;)

I do agree Catlady, I suppose its not nice to hear at the time but thats their loss...;)
 
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M

mrspuddleduck

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I think when it comes to dating, if someone rejects you because of diabetes, I'd consider that a lucky escape. I wouldn't want to be in a relationship with someone who would think like that. There are plenty more fish in the sea, decent, accepting fish. ;)

So so true! Years ago when I first got ill, my then partner dumped me cause he couldn't cope. I was shattered, couldn't believe that this guy who had professed his undying love could run that fast as soon as life became a little difficult! I was in hospital when he did it!!! Nowadays, even after all these years, I have a quiet little smile , what a lucky escape I had!! Be kind to yourself, and as a geriatric rock chic, take it from me, get back on those drums!! :D Sue xxxx
 
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TorqPenderloin

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I think when it comes to dating, if someone rejects you because of diabetes, I'd consider that a lucky escape. I wouldn't want to be in a relationship with someone who would think like that. There are plenty more fish in the sea, decent, accepting fish. ;)
That was my initial thought as well, but I can understand how that can be advice that's much easier to give than to receive.
 

TonySleigh

Member
Messages
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Type of diabetes
Type 1
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Insulin
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Celery, Wine bars, snazzy restaurants,
So so true! Years ago when I first got ill, my then partner dumped me cause he couldn't cope. I was shattered, couldn't believe that this guy who had professed his undying love could run that fast as soon as life became a little difficult! I was in hospital when he did it!!! Nowadays, even after all these years, I have a quiet little smile , what a lucky escape I had!! Be kind to yourself, and as a geriatric rock chic, take it from me, get back on those drums!! :D Sue xxxx
LOL... You did have a lucky escape didn't you Sue! Sorry to hear you had this issue in such a worse time but doesn't it open your eyes about people?? I kind of thought that wouldn't it be good my future lady would also be diabetic, at least she would understand what we have to go through sometimes, thats not to say that there are also good, understanding, caring non diabetics.
I still play my electric drums and will get back into a band...I just love playing. Fingers crossed for Saturday xx
 
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TorqPenderloin

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I kind of thought that wouldn't it be good my future lady would also be diabetic
That sounds very expensive, lol

I think almost everyone wishes they were a bit taller, a bit better looking, and had a few extra/fewer inches here and there. The only difference is that we also add type 1 diabetes to that of things we can't control (but wish we could) about us.

So what if you have a hypo and accidentally spill a glass of wine on your date? Worst case, it's a good story to tell your buddies the next day. Best case, it's a story you can tell at your wedding.

Best of luck in finding happiness.
 
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tim2000s

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And to give you an idea about dealing with hypos, I've been having a fun one tonight. We took a client out and I overestimated the carb content of what I've eaten. I suspected I had, and I guessed that would bring a hypo, but I'm hypo aware, I kind of expected it and therefore I am able to test and anticipate and head it off at the pass knowing full well what I need to do to deal with it.

That's easily the best way I find of dealing with them. And in the worst case you get to eat a bag of jelly babies. As @himtoo has said, it happens to us all, and it's how we choose to deal with them that is the key. This stands for both highs and lows. Just know your protocol, apply it and learn from it and you'll be surprised how much easier everything becomes.

Once it is easier to deal with, confidence is much easier to regain because you know your boundaries and what you need to do to remain somewhere where you are in control.
 
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