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<blockquote data-quote="2131tom" data-source="post: 436619" data-attributes="member: 85280"><p>This thread seems to be the perfect opportunity to share a little funny that I've just come across on the web. It's written for the US but if we substitute for the number of MPs in Westminster, it's a perfect fit here, too. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did: </p><p></p><p><strong>New Entrant in the Periodic Table.</strong></p><p></p><p>Research has led to the discovery of the heaviest element known to science.</p><p></p><p>The new element, Governmentium (GV), has one neutron, 25 assistant neutrons, 88 deputy neutrons and 198 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312.</p><p></p><p>These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons. Because Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert; however, it can be detected, because it impedes every action with which it comes into contact.</p><p></p><p>A minute amount of Governmentium can cause a reaction that would normally take less than a second, to take from four days to four years to complete. Govermentium has a normal half-life of 2-6 years; it does not decay, but instead undergoes a reorganization in which of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places.</p><p></p><p>In fact, Governmentium's mass will actually increase over time, since each reorganization will cause more morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes. This characteristic of moron promotion leads some scientists to believe that Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a critical concentration. This hypothetical quality is referred to as 'critical morass'. When catalyzed with money, Governmentium becomes Administratium, an element that radiates just as much energy as Governmentium, since it has half as many peons but twice as many morons.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="2131tom, post: 436619, member: 85280"] This thread seems to be the perfect opportunity to share a little funny that I've just come across on the web. It's written for the US but if we substitute for the number of MPs in Westminster, it's a perfect fit here, too. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did: [b]New Entrant in the Periodic Table.[/b] Research has led to the discovery of the heaviest element known to science. The new element, Governmentium (GV), has one neutron, 25 assistant neutrons, 88 deputy neutrons and 198 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312. These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons. Because Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert; however, it can be detected, because it impedes every action with which it comes into contact. A minute amount of Governmentium can cause a reaction that would normally take less than a second, to take from four days to four years to complete. Govermentium has a normal half-life of 2-6 years; it does not decay, but instead undergoes a reorganization in which of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places. In fact, Governmentium's mass will actually increase over time, since each reorganization will cause more morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes. This characteristic of moron promotion leads some scientists to believe that Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a critical concentration. This hypothetical quality is referred to as 'critical morass'. When catalyzed with money, Governmentium becomes Administratium, an element that radiates just as much energy as Governmentium, since it has half as many peons but twice as many morons. [/QUOTE]
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