BF 'forgets' I am diabetic

[noblehead]

At 53 do I still cut it as the younger generation?

Absolutely.....................just

 

[therower]

@**shell** . Definitely look at the thread suggested by @Snapsy .
Not only is it inspirational and informative it will also give you an insight the greatness of people on the forum.
She and they know who they are so I won't post names and I'll let you judge for yourselves.

 

[Engineer88]

My BF appears to have limited interest in my diabetes. However, he was incredibly supportive when I had a serious hypo so I know he cares ... he just doesn't always think about the effects of eating lots of carbs or anything just before I go to bed.

On thing that helped was making it a bit of a game ... guess how many carbs in this meal. Certainly made him more aware and gave him something to do which made him feel useful.

We had our first game of this weds? syrup sponge (she insists on buying these things as she wants to share and thinks its a loving thing to do) I said how many do you think? she said 7. my eyebrows responded so she upped her guess to 17!

actual value was 62.

I cannot complain though as I've asked her to marry me. Shes possibly the most supportive person ever including making better suggestions about bolus than I do (I rage!)

I digress, this is an awesome very helpful way of teaching.

 

[Snapsy]

Awwwwwww congrats to you both, @Engineer88 !

 

[**shell**]

Hi @**shell** , sending a hug your way.

The fabulous @himtoo started the thread I've linked to below - it's well worth a read for both you and your boyfriend, if you're trying to get across to him all the things you have to be dealing with day in day out.

Accompanying cuppa recommended!

http://www.diabetes.co.uk/forum/threads/explaining-what-its-really-like-to-live-with-type-1.103794/

@Snapsy I actually sent my BF your input on the first page of that link a few weeks ago. Explaining it was a pretty good description to how I feel and go through, I think he started it put said it was getting too complicated.... my response was "welcome to my life!"

To everyone else, thank you for all of your support and suggestions... and hugs.

I think I am going to have to just chip away at him.

We had a conversation about how I would like him to be more aware and involved in my condition. After initially brushing it off saying "that's why I've told you that you should find a group" he has started to understand that I don't want an expert I would like someone that can recognise my behaviours and if needed feel confident in treating me in an emergency etc.

I think more drip feeding is required.

I also like the carb counting game too!

xoxox


Sent from my SM-G920F using Diabetes.co.uk Forum mobile app

 

[noblehead]

I cannot complain though as I've asked her to marry me.

Hope the answer is Yes @Engineer88 , best wishes to you both

I think I am going to have to just chip away at him.

That's it, slowly does it @**shell** , keep the thread updated with your progress.

 

[fletchweb]

Hiya
I have deleted several drafts of this thread because they are a little whiny.

So here is the simplified version...

Anyone else struggle with disinterested (probably a bit too strong a word) partners? Or anyone have any tips that can help me try and drip feed him info?

He loves me and he understands to an extent but I don't feel he really truly understands the seriousness of the condition or how much time and energy I have to put into it.

Thanks Shell
xoxox



Sent from my SM-G920F using Diabetes.co.uk Forum mobile app

Hi @shell,
When I was in my teens and early 20s I kept being type1 a secret because I was concerned it would get in the way of any potential relationships - then I fell in love with someone in University and with much trepidation I told her and she didn't care. As a result she has saved my life at least twice when I've gone in to hypos, and 34 years later (with 2 grown kids) we're still together and she has my back.
So if your partner has your back - in my books that's good enough

All the best!

 

[becca59]

I feel blessed. My husband has been on this journey with me, although not diabetic. I couldn't have done it without him.

 

[Jaylee]

Hiya
I have deleted several drafts of this thread because they are a little whiny.

So here is the simplified version...

Anyone else struggle with disinterested (probably a bit too strong a word) partners? Or anyone have any tips that can help me try and drip feed him info?

He loves me and he understands to an extent but I don't feel he really truly understands the seriousness of the condition or how much time and energy I have to put into it.

Thanks Shell
xoxox



Sent from my SM-G920F using Diabetes.co.uk Forum mobile app

Hi,

The way I see it... The guy may just be showing you some respect & giving you a "normal" life? Not overdoing the diabetes aspect from his perspective.. With the best intentions.. He just sees the you.
He possibly & genuinly feels you don't have an issue, with no desire to ecroach on that aspect of your life, thus giving you empowerment as his partner.
Not so much "disinterested", but more just playing it cool...

 

[**shell**]

@Jaylee I really like your perspective on things, I think it's very easy to view something with negative eyes especially when it comes down to diabetes.
Thank you. X

Sent from my SM-G920F using Diabetes.co.uk Forum mobile app

 

[**shell**]

I have an update:

I have been showing him little bits and bobs I find online including the video on here of the ranting girl. I've been trying to talk a bit more about how I feel and it all seems to be working. He's even bought me the Think Like A Pancrease book which I mentioned I was going to buy!!!

Your tips all seem to be working!

xoxox

Sent from my SM-G920F using Diabetes.co.uk Forum mobile app

 

[Engineer88]

@noblehead it was a yes, date is being set for December (we don't want to wait!!)

@Snapsy thank you

 

[Mike d]

@Jaylee I really like your perspective on things, I think it's very easy to view something with negative eyes especially when it comes down to diabetes.
Thank you. X

Sent from my SM-G920F using Diabetes.co.uk Forum mobile app

@Jaylee nailed it ... the way many guys would approach it but there when needed