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Bit of help please

Hedonista

Well-Known Member
Messages
240
Type of diabetes
Prediabetes
Treatment type
Diet only
I suffered two significant bereavements in December and have been struggling to keep the food thing together.

I have stuck to low carb foods and haven't been eating any added sugar (except for whatever's in 85% chocolate), but:

Portion control is out of the window, I'm comfort eating, ravenous and insatiable
I am eating a lot of cheese and cream
I'm drinking a fair bit of red wine and now and then will see a bottle off in an evening, although I've sorted that out a bit and am now drinking wine a maximum of once a week,or less, and maybe half a bottle at a time
I've not tested my blood sugar for weeks and am sort of burying my head in the sand

I'm also in a bit of general chaos - I often skip breakfast, and can end up eating my day's food between 3-10pm. I'm not sleeping well either. Because I'm exhausted I'm exercising less, and unsurprisingly, I've stopped losing weight (and I need to).

I feel like I'm out of control, and spiralling a bit. I know what I SHOULD do, but my old and trusty coping mechanism - comfort eat your heart out - is well and truly in the driving seat...

Anyone have any suggestions of how I can do what I know I need to do, but seem to be unable to do, ie, settle down, go to bed early, eat three meals a day and bloody calm down!

I'm hoping simply writing it down here might help me get my head around it a bit!
 
Sorry you've been having such a dreadful time of it @Hedonista

The only way I've ever found to get myself out of a spiral or rut is to plan my way out & tackle one thing at a time - one thing seems a lot less insurmountable.
 
Very sorry to hear about your losses.
It is important to let yourself grieve.
Is there any way you could express that grief without involving food?

But don't knock yourself! You came here, and you have stuck to low carb, and you are in control of the wine, and you have recognised the comfort eating for what it is.

Those are pretty huge achievements.

Tomorrow, Saturday, try doing one thing to show your love for the people you have lost, and one thing for yourself.
I'll bet they would want you to.
 
Talk out loud just like you're doing. That's always what helps me.

For me, I have to assess what is causing me to act this way.
Then, I have to assess why I'm resorting to this particular mechanism (in this case food) as a means of seeking short-term satisfaction.
Eventually, I have to figure out a (healthier) replacement or remove the behavior from my life altogether.

Obviously, it's an incredibly difficult process, but it's what works for me.

I have a habit of eating when I'm bored. When there's nothing to do, I open the fridge. I'm certainly not perfect, but I had to train myself to drink a glass of water first, go do something else for 5 minutes and then see if I'm still hungry. It's not fool-proof, but it works more often than not.

The cause- boredom
The mechanism- food (it's something to do, it's convenient, and it tastes good)
The replacement- glass of water (it's something to do, it's convenient, and it's a healthier replacement)
 
Hi @Hedonista, my condolences to you for your bereavements. I know this will be a stressful time, but although it's a cliche, time is a great healer. It doesn't sound like your eating is too bad if you are still avoiding sugar and carbs. I don't eat breakfast and only eat in the evening and have a couple of glasses of red wine and cheese.
You do need to get back to testing though. You might be pleasantly surprised to find your readings aren't that bad. But if they are you will know what you need to do.
 
Thank you for your wise words, all of you! I think the one thing at a time approach is do-able. Isn't it weird how you just can't think straight when you're in the middle of stuff?! I think going to bed at a decent time would help everything else fall into place, so that's my mission for this week! Thanks again, I really appreciate it xx
 
Just let it take it's time. I think it's perfectly normal to mess up things in your situation. I know I did. I lost my mother and husband last year.
 
One would be enough @Hedonista but two can send anyone into a magnified state of loss. We all know it hurts and wouldn't be human if we didn't.

It manifests itself in so many ways, it's incalculable. Describing it the way you do, go take a long walk with each of them, remember them with good thoughts, come back home and rest and know they might well have heard you ... and no, that's not me thinking of the other side, but deep down those connections exist. We miss what we miss.
 
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