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Bullies and diabeties?

Discussion in 'General Chat' started by Lulu9101112, Jun 16, 2017.

  1. Lulu9101112

    Lulu9101112 Type 1 · Well-Known Member

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    So I'm currently getting bullied in college for US Viewers. UK College is technically grade 11/12 +(Year 12/13+)
    I've just had enough of them because they keep calling me names and comment on the chlothes I wear and keep swearing. the bully even said once I shouldn't of been born or should go die and my family hate me etc... What made me more annoyed is they took my lunch and was like "you can't eat that because your diabetic"
    The only thing that's stopped is when it was physical. (because anything physical you can get suspended) but it's just gone to worse verbal.
    I've tried telling staff. They tell the bullies off but the bully still doesn't stop.
    I've always been bullied throughout my life from year 3-now.
    What's most annoying is that back in secondary during year 10 (Grade 9) due to school bullies I actually nearly killed myself but luckily didn't but my parents thought it was an accident I never told the real reason as I didn't want my parents to get the police involved and I don't want the same thing to happen again.
    Is there anything I can do to stop this bullying because I still think like I don't want to live anymore the only thing that's stopping me is My Hamster and doctor who.
    ps also because of bullies all this stress makes my blood high. How can I prevent this?
    PLEASE HELP
     
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    #1 Lulu9101112, Jun 16, 2017 at 7:50 PM
    Last edited: Jun 16, 2017
  2. andcol

    andcol I reversed my Type 2 · Well-Known Member
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    Hi

    Bullies are normally insecure and only feel strong in a crowd. Remember it isn't you as such just that you are different. The only real answer you have is to talk to your parents and the teachers. Bullying is mental abuse, so please report it or the the individual will never grow up.
     
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  3. Lulu9101112

    Lulu9101112 Type 1 · Well-Known Member

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    I did but my parents just tell the college and the teachers just tell them off but that doesn't work they still do it.
     
  4. andcol

    andcol I reversed my Type 2 · Well-Known Member
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    The college has a duty of care and if the warning isnt working then they have escalation procedures including suspension and expulsion. Please talk to the college head and tell them everything that is going on.
     
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  5. spook_kate_

    spook_kate_ Researcher · Well-Known Member

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    Hi @Lulu9101112, firstly, I am so so sorry you're going through such a rough time. Honestly no one has the slightest idea of how you must be feeling. Show your parents this exact thread. They need to know the extent of the suffering you're going through. Same with the school: they need to step up!! We are here to listen and support you. Feel free to message. It's never easy being young and having to deal with adult life, hormones, the diabetes and bullies. I'm rooting for you
     
  6. kumera

    kumera Prediabetes · Well-Known Member

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    Hi Lulu,
    It's never easy to be a little different. There's a lot of cruel and ignorant people out there, but you are unique and much better than them. Seems like you're finished with school soon anyway, just try and hold on a bit longer. There's a whole new life waiting for you! That said, you need to make sure your parents knows how much this affects you. Bullying is never okay and the school have to take it seriously. Pets are great to cheer you up and hamsters are so cute. What's the name of your hamster? I've got this 1 year old puppy that we've trained to get sticks and it's the cutest. Her best friend is an old tomcat and they sleep together on her dog bed :) There's so much more to life than school, which you will find out soon enough. The bullies are usually the losers that end up with ****** lives. They probably have heaps of problems themselves, people only show you what they want you to see. They might seem perfect people with perfect lives, but very few people have that. Join some groups outside school, like yoga, relax, find better people in your life, and be HAPPY. You sound like a great person, a bit nerdy, just like my kids :) Who wants to be like everyone else??
     
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  7. DiabeticDadUK

    DiabeticDadUK Type 1 · Well-Known Member

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    It breaks my heart to read this, it really does.

    Others have already mentioned, bullies are the ones with the problems and not you. Often a crowd mentality forms and many of your bullies are simply following the lead of others to "fit in". You've been incredibly brave by coping with this for so long. It's time for it to stop. Try to underline just how miserable this is making you to your parents. Perhaps even talk to your GP about it too. It might be difficult to say the words but once they understand how upset you are then hopefully a process can begin to stop it.

    Preventing the stress can be very difficult. I suggest you seek comfort in people who do not bully you. Even if those people are online. Listen to the music you like. Try to find happiness away from the bullies. Don't allow them to dominate your life. They are meaningless and probably exceptionally miserable inside.

    If they are singling you out because you are different then that makes you cool. All the great people I've ever met have been unique and stand out from the crowd. Don't give up. The universe has a funny way of making everything work out in the end. :)
     
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  8. Jaylee

    Jaylee Type 1 · Moderator
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    Hi @Lulu9101112 ,

    I'm a lot older than you, but had similar at college.. Was a bit of a rocker in the "day", the others were "trendy" all my clothes were black. I was accused of wearing the same attire day in day out. Somebody caught me out injecting. Rumour went round I was a "junkie.".
    I've kept hamsters too! Have you tried giving them a generic bone shaped dog biscuit? Good for the gnawing & lots of fun watching them carry it about while they decide where to store it...
    Years later? My bullies didn't actually amount to much... I ended up in a Metal band.
    DW is great! Though I was a Tom Baker guy..

    Stay strong. If your family love you that's all that counts.

    Your bullies are fools who can't see the future.
    I'll jump back into my Delorean now! ;)
     
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  9. Lulu9101112

    Lulu9101112 Type 1 · Well-Known Member

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    Thanks everyone but it's mainly outside of the campus now like on way home and to college. (No way to avoid them i can only walk one route to my public bus stop)
    But i don't really care anymore as it's nearly summer. i finish college soon. The only thing i really think about is whether they'll be back in September but i guess i'll have to wait and find out when it's september. So for now i'm just looking forward to summer.
     
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  10. spook_kate_

    spook_kate_ Researcher · Well-Known Member

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    And hope you have a brilliant summer
     
  11. Lulu9101112

    Lulu9101112 Type 1 · Well-Known Member

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    Thanks will do.
     
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  12. jay hay-char

    jay hay-char Type 2 · Well-Known Member

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    That's a good attitude, and in the end it will be you that is laughing at them because they are sad little losers and you are not.

    However, bear in mind that stress (whether caused by bullying or anything else) has been linked to higher Blood Sugar levels in individuals. If the problem is still on-going when you return in the autumn, one thing I'd suggest is doing a bit of research about this, presenting your findings to the appropriate safeguarding or counselling person at the college and asking to see the risk assessment that they have prepared in relation to your situation. They won't have done one, of course, but if you confirm formally to them (i.e. in writing) that the behaviour of some of your fellow students is causing you to feel distressed and harassed, may be affecting your sugar levels and you feel that the time has come to make it a formal issue, they should prepare a risk assessment and feel compelled to follow up on it, and document the follow ups or else they will get a caning when OFSTED come to visit. The college have responsibility for their students' behaviour both on and off campus, as do their parents.

    I agree that this whole business will pass, but bullies have a habit of retaining behaviour like this into their working lives, and if they're not called to account, they may well go on to make people's working lives a misery and frustrate HR people like me, who have to deal with their behaviour in the workplace. In the course of my professional career I had to deal with a couple of very sad situations arising from bullying.

    By the way, don't take the advice of a complete stranger on the internet - do, please, discuss this possible course of action with your parents and/or safeguarding person at college before you actually do anything. A little advance warning to the college might actually solve the problem without it having to become a formal matter. Good luck, whatever the outcome. In a year or so, you will be at Uni (I hope) and discussing what a bunch of wombats the students at your college were, with the brilliant friends that you will make there.

    ssssssssssss
    ss will pass

    ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
    (sorry about the gobbledegook above, this is just some sage advice from our four month old kitten, Cooper, who decided to wander across the keyboard at a crucial moment :)
     
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  13. therower

    therower Type 1 · Well-Known Member

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    Hi @Lulu9101112 . Such a shame you have to share your life with these sad individuals. Bullying is a drug. The more they bully you the more they need to bully you, like a drug it gives them pleasure. The pleasure in bullying you is knowing they are upsetting and ruining your life ( which they know is better than there's,commonly known as jealousy ) if you can takeaway there pleasure they will lose interest overtime. Learn to smile ( they really hate that ) Next time they approach get in there first and ask them what they want to say today to upset you even encourage them and give them tips as to what to say.
    I was bullied at school age 5 to 12 not because I was diabetic ( that came later in life ) but because I was big for my age and was an easy option for kids older than me. Sadly I wasn't able to do what I've advised you to do because no one was ther to tell me what to do.
    As I said I was bullied for being big............. well I stayed big, I moved schools away from bullies, I started playing rugby and started using weights. I was still me, quite and not a fighter really just older and bigger.
    Jump forward a few years. I caught a bus, went upstairs ( old double decker ) and bang oh **** there sitting on the back of the bus was one of the main bullies. For a split second I was back at school, until I realised this guy had a look on his face.
    He looked like I felt all those years ago, he was crapping himself, a nervous smile and a move on the seat to let me sit down led to an interesting conversation about times gone by, I said nothing because I knew I had no need to. He was so afraid of this bigger than him bloke sitting there he couldn't stop babbling.
    Your time will come,remember not to become the bully. Be honourable.
    Over the years I've met more of the bullies from my childhood and they have all been as nice as possible, sadly out of cowardice, not friendship. There loss not mine.
    You are strong and will gain great strength from every passing day.
    For what it's worth I'm on your side.
     
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  14. MH2010

    MH2010 Type 1 · Well-Known Member

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    @Lulu9101112

    I had a problem like this when I was younger (I'm 30 now).

    If you feel like you cant tell your parents exactly how this is making you feel, write them a letter then give it to them.

    Putting it ito words can be a great release for all the **** you are feeling just now.

    ALWAYS remember, YOU are the better person for not harming yourself and for being brave enough to write this thread!!

    I also saw one of the bullies when I had left school and working as a door supervisor, safe to say she crapped herself as soon as I took a step towards her, hell, that felt good!

    I have moved 150 miles from where I was brought up and now everyone in the new area are very friendly and think I would be shocked if I heard of any bullying here.
     
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  15. spook_kate_

    spook_kate_ Researcher · Well-Known Member

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    @Lulu9101112, all of these replies are from all of us who care big (((((hugs))))
     
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  16. SugarDaddy91

    SugarDaddy91 Type 2 · Well-Known Member

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    I was bullied quite often in school! I would get pretty violent in response to the bullying and at one point I severely injured one of them. You would think it felt good, and when I was releasing all of that rage, seeing teeth break and pierce lips, it did. Later, I realized that I felt worse livibg with what I did than living with the bullying, Of course, when that happens, suddenly everyone cares. And who do they take action against? Not the bully. In time, of course, I learned that my teachers wanted me to stay solid. My bullies were not so.. academic... and some of them came from very bad homes. I recently took a trip to the gossip-mill and heard talk of them. I enquired how they were from the locals (super small Norwegian town) and I could feel nothing but pity for them.
    One guy, he was 2 years older than me, would make my life a nightmare. He would come over, call me fat and grab for my manbreasts. All I wanted was to be alone in recess and survive the day, but he always found me. I tried losing weight and cried myself to sleep almost every night. If I did not have my dog, I would not have survived those years. He always listened to me. A few years later, after finishing school, I met him out on the town. He was out on probation after having served 9 months in prison for assault. He spotted me, came over, called me fat and actually started to urinate on me. This was as a grown man! Either way, what I heard from these older men at the mill, was that last they heard, he had lost his job for drinking too much and being an ass in general. He is now an alcoholic outcast who pushed everyone away. The criminal record will make it hard for him to take on a new job,

    Another one of my bullies would steal my backpack and rummage through it, one time stealing my gameboy. Never got it back. He recently committed suicide after a long time of isolation, alcoholism and unemployment.

    Yet another one was imprisoned for statutory rape for having a relationship with someone much too youbg for him. The list goes on and on, really.

    Upon hearing that one of them turned out OK, I was actually quite relieved. I hated them, but wishing misery upon someone ends at some point. He had children he loved above anything else and a nice job, nice house. I later met him, and even though he did not apologize, he seemed very full of regret for what he had done to me. Indirectly, I guess I accepted his apology. Even hugged me once we met and he was celebrating his birthday.

    I did quite well for myself. I thought about those bullies quite often during my education, and actually thought that if I did well, I would somehow be better than them. I worked HARD and became almost a genious in my field generally accepted as the superb go-to-guy for a lot of people who need medical advice. After all that time, though... I could only pity my bullies...

    I'm trying to say that it gets better. Talking to the school rarely works, parents could work, depending on the culture. Some parents simply laugh it off when other parents complain of their child's behaviour. In the end we are what we are and I do not know a single bully who has a well functioning life without thinking about their past mistakes. At first I wanted them to be miserable, but later it kind of changed. Pity them already, because their personalities really are not compatible with living in the modern society,
    Not hijacking the thread. Never talked about this before. I clearly have strong feelings about this still. But I want you to know that it gets better. And for them it can only go downwards. Use the forum to vent!
    Sorry again for the long post.

    Saving up the latest season, myself. I've heard rumours that say the next regeneration is going to be a woman. Do you believe it?
     
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