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Dating and diabetes

H

Happy talk

Member
Messages
5
Type of diabetes
Treatment type
Insulin
Just wondering how everyone copes with confidence issues because of diabetes. I was always really confident and yet now struggle to socialise x
 
I never socialise apart from at work, but don't let the diabetes stop you from it infact I would recommend it so your confidence grows due to being Diabetic :)
 
Maybe I'm just an arrogant but I'm not exactly sure why I should feel less confident or self-conscious of my diabetes (for the record, I don't).

No one can "catch" my diabetes from me. It does take additional effort to maintain my health, but my quality of life isn't reduced like it would be if I had terminal cancer.

I think people tend to treat you how you treat yourself and that's especially seems to be true with respect to having diabetes. I don't feel sorry for myself, I don't feel like a victim, and I certainly don't want/expect others to feel that way about me.

Of course, im not happy that I have diabetes, but in a weird way, I have a sense of pride about it. As diabetics, we should be proud of the effort and dedication it takes to managing our health.

Furthermore, I don't hide my diabetes one bit. I wear a medical bracelet that reads in bold letters "ALERT! Type 1 Diabetes." When I run I often don't wear a shirt which means everyone can see my Dexcom sensor, and when I'm out with friends I don't try to hide my injections.

You have no reason to be ashamed, or to try to hide your diabetes. Embrace it, it's a part of your life, and you can't change that. Eventually, you'll meet someone that wants to also become a part of your life and loves you just the way you are.
 
It was never an issue for me. When out on a date, if we were eating, I'd warn them that I was diabetic and that I would be injecting. If that caused a problem then they weren't the right person anyway.

I've never had a problem being confident around other people. It all comes back to not being defined by your diabetes, but it simply being another characteristic of self.

As someone else posted in a different thread a long time ago, treat diabetes as an ally and not an enemy. It shouldn't be the be all and end all of your life. It just adds a little bit more to who you are.
 
Happy talk said:
Just wondering how everyone copes with confidence issues because of diabetes. I was always really confident and yet now struggle to socialise x
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Hi, your confidence and self esteem has been knocked a little. I'm sure it will get easier for you and that special someone will be out there, probably when you aren't even looking,
But, I have found it difficult, maybe it's a little easier for a man because, in general, women tend to be more understanding and caring when a medical condition is brought up.
Also it's down to other factors as well, personality and age too. I think I am going to give up, it's too complicated, hard work, frustrating and tiresome for me.
Good luck and all the best.
RRB
 
I'm a recovered alcoholic and possibly a type II diabetic (waiting to see a doctor for a proper test, though my home testing kit indicates I'm diabetic).

But one thing I've learnt from my alcoholism is that a 'negative' can be turned into a positive. There is rarely such a thing as 'bad' if it can be transformed into a strength. There's a line in my recovery literature which says "Pain is the spiritual touchstone of all growth" and that means that it takes pain to force us to change (which is why recovered alcoholics treasure their rock bottoms).

Whether I am diabetic, or not (and I think I am judging by my symptoms and tests), it's forced me to look at my diet and exercise regime, and who knows, maybe the pain of diabetes will - in the long run - be a positive and it'll force me to make some changes and I'll live a healthier and happier life because of it?

I like TorqPenderloin's take on his diabetes; it seems like he's taken responsibility for his condition and gained a sense of confidence that he can handle what life throws at him. He used the word 'embrace'; love it. Embrace your hill.
 
Ideally I would date a Type 1 or Type 2 on insulin lady for romantic injecting each other lol and other stuff like low carbohydrate dinner dates and texting each other our blood glucose readings. Yes I am mad lol
 
Robinredbreast said:
Hi, your confidence and self esteem has been knocked a little. I'm sure it will get easier for you and that special someone will be out there, probably when you aren't even looking,
But, I have found it difficult, maybe it's a little easier for a man because, in general, women tend to be more understanding and caring when a medical condition is brought up.
Also it's down to other factors as well, personality and age too. I think I am going to give up, it's too complicated, hard work, frustrating and tiresome for me.
Good luck and all the best.
RRB
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Like you RRB, I've given up. Now enjoying life as mad old spinster with a load of animals ha ha xx
 
I'm not necessarily massively socially confident in lots of ways (though I get by, like most people), but diabetes is not something that worries me like that. I've always just gone ahead and injected/tested/pumped/answered questions as necessary and most people don't bat an eyelid...
 
ah yes illnesses can do that to your confidence... I used to think diabetes was embarrassing until I got more embarrassing things to deal with. Anyone who sees me to socialise or whatever can't ignore that I burp and hiccup quite a lot and when I talk I'm hard to listen too. Also I'm always needing a toilet like every half hour to an hour on average. So now days the only embarrassing thing about diabetes for me is when I have a hypo and I'm not too good from it... like if my speech starts slurring and I'm walking into walls and things (I do that when walking and then hypo.). You should be right. :)
 
I've never let diabetes get in the way of dating, I'm sure in time your confidence will return @Happy talk
 
noblehead said:
I've never let diabetes get in the way of dating, I'm sure in time your confidence will return @Happy talk
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I don't either, but others do. Why go out with me, a 57 year old ( 3 years off of 60, but still slim, active and look younger than my age, I have been told this) when there's someone younger, with hopefully a longer longevity and either no or a minimal medical condition.
When someone makes a comment (on line) regarding sexual implications:eek::wideyed::arghh:, Aids and HIV related, that's downright crass and nasty and can be soul destroying. I've been there, and got the T shirt..............................
 
There's someone for everyone @Robinredbreast, some of the on-line comments are rather nasty and vindictive and best ignored IMHO, always remember it says more about them than it does about you.

Best wishes.
 
noblehead said:
There's someone for everyone @Robinredbreast, some of the on-line comments are rather nasty and vindictive and best ignored IMHO, always remember it says more about them than it does about you.

Best wishes.
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Still not nice as I said, been there etc, etc, etc
 
Robinredbreast said:
I don't either, but others do. Why go out with me, a 57 year old ( 3 years off of 60, but still slim, active and look younger than my age, I have been told this) when there's someone younger, with hopefully a longer longevity and either no or a minimal medical condition.
When someone makes a comment (on line) regarding sexual implications:eek::wideyed::arghh:, Aids and HIV related, that's downright crass and nasty and can be soul destroying. I've been there, and got the T shirt..............................
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Well at 47 I thought I was going on the scrapheap too, it's just negative thinking and yes it is a corny saying but love is not all about looks etc, it's a start maybe but it's more than that. I think living on my own for 24 years did the "non commitment" thing for me. It's just a personal thing for me, I'm too used to independence and would take a big leap to change.
 
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