Hi
@LMbee and welcome to the forums. I'm sorry you are in such a dark place.
Can I assume you are T1 on a pump? How long have you been T1?
Do you have some sort of cgm to go with your pump? Setting an alarm for eg 4.4 (the default on my self funded dexcom) should help with fending off the lows. (You may want to use a different level.)
But you've obviously had a massively stressful time and looking after an 11 month old child is also enormously stressful. (I can remember dreaming of getting a few hours unbroken sleep and just having some quiet time on my own on the loo.)
I must admit my diabetic control was the last thing I thought about after my two T1 pregnancies (a long time ago, precgm). I can well believe that control is easier and life is less stressful when you are having a break from your baby. (That doesn't mean you aren't a good parent or that you don't love your child, it's just that being a new parent is stressful).
Also does anyone struggle with controlling their blood sugar levels overnight after having a takeaway for tea? No matter what I do, even setting a temp basal in the night or injecting over 4 hours, I still wake up in the 20’s, irs so frustrating!
I've got to say I've given up on pizza and fish and chips isn't great, but that's partly because I'm pretty low carb (less than 100g a day) and I think I've got out of the habit of bolusing for large carb meals. More important, I've gotten out of the habit of counting the carbs in them correctly. But plenty of T1s do manage to bolus for large carbs successfully, it's just that I've got a bit more insulin resistance than I like. But it occurs to me that after your baby your insulin needs may be changing so it could be as simple as adjusting your rates a bit more? (Not a pump user so I can't be much help with that.)
Anyway, just sending you lots of positive thoughts and hoping that things will get easier for you soon. Just hang in there.
As regards the food, if you're willing to accept carb substitutes there are some good ones (cauliflower rice, spiralised spaghetti instead of pasta?). Otherwise, maybe just be very careful on the carb counting and tweak your bolus ratio???