I think I am about to go against the mainstream advice in this thread 
Firstly, your partner is (significantly?) over 20 stone, and was before diagnosis.
So this to me is the major problem, not the T2 diabetes.
To get to this weight you usually have to eat not just the "wrong" things but a lot of them over a long period.
You also either have to be proud of your weight, or desperately unhappy about it and eating to cheer yourself up.
[Please excuse the sweeping generalisation!]
In his situation, the diet advice from the NHS is good because it is aimed at getting obese non-diabetics (80% of their clients) to reduce weight.
The idea is that you eat everything you like, but less of it.
You also have more of things you may not be eating enough of to make the "balanced" plate.
I know on here we generally don't agree with this diet advice because of the amount of carbs, but I believe that this approach is a pragmatic one because it is hard enough to get someone to reduce portion sizes without also denying them the pleasure foods that they have eaten all their life and which they crave.
The HCPs are well aware of the problems of modifying eating habits and are happy with limited gains which they can achieve instead of "ideal" solutions which will be rejected out of hand.
As an aside, I was chatting with a long term T1 a while back and he said that his first reaction on diagnosis was to go to the sweet shop and eat as much as he could because he knew sweets were going to be taken away from him.
I think your partner is going down this route - denial that there is a problem (which we all go through) plus a fear that he is going to be forced to give up the foods he craves.
His reaction is to challenge any change you put forward and also to go out and eat so he is successfully rejecting your attempts to modify and control his diet.
I think it is more important to address the weight than change the underlying diet.
Giving him the food he has always had (but less of it) keeps you on his side instead of being the enemy.
Any counselling services the NHS offers plus membership of a weight loss club may help to motivate him.
He needs to be motivated to change - you cannot force him even though you know it is in his own best interest.
If he is lucky and he can take a significant chunk of weight off fairly quickly he may be able to reverse his symptoms.
Summary: I would address the psychological reasons that he is over 20 stone before trying to change what he eats. Once he is willing to lose weight, then he is more likely to be open to dietary changes.
Hope this helps.
LGC
Firstly, your partner is (significantly?) over 20 stone, and was before diagnosis.
So this to me is the major problem, not the T2 diabetes.
To get to this weight you usually have to eat not just the "wrong" things but a lot of them over a long period.
You also either have to be proud of your weight, or desperately unhappy about it and eating to cheer yourself up.
[Please excuse the sweeping generalisation!]
In his situation, the diet advice from the NHS is good because it is aimed at getting obese non-diabetics (80% of their clients) to reduce weight.
The idea is that you eat everything you like, but less of it.
You also have more of things you may not be eating enough of to make the "balanced" plate.
I know on here we generally don't agree with this diet advice because of the amount of carbs, but I believe that this approach is a pragmatic one because it is hard enough to get someone to reduce portion sizes without also denying them the pleasure foods that they have eaten all their life and which they crave.
The HCPs are well aware of the problems of modifying eating habits and are happy with limited gains which they can achieve instead of "ideal" solutions which will be rejected out of hand.
As an aside, I was chatting with a long term T1 a while back and he said that his first reaction on diagnosis was to go to the sweet shop and eat as much as he could because he knew sweets were going to be taken away from him.
I think your partner is going down this route - denial that there is a problem (which we all go through) plus a fear that he is going to be forced to give up the foods he craves.
His reaction is to challenge any change you put forward and also to go out and eat so he is successfully rejecting your attempts to modify and control his diet.
I think it is more important to address the weight than change the underlying diet.
Giving him the food he has always had (but less of it) keeps you on his side instead of being the enemy.
Any counselling services the NHS offers plus membership of a weight loss club may help to motivate him.
He needs to be motivated to change - you cannot force him even though you know it is in his own best interest.
If he is lucky and he can take a significant chunk of weight off fairly quickly he may be able to reverse his symptoms.
Summary: I would address the psychological reasons that he is over 20 stone before trying to change what he eats. Once he is willing to lose weight, then he is more likely to be open to dietary changes.
Hope this helps.
LGC
