Hi
@Libby3781, Based on my 52 years experience as a diabetic and not professional advice or opinion:
Unfortunately many health professionals seem to think that we are children who have to eat X vegetables, carbs etc each day, have 3 meals every single day and disallow that we might have feelings and our own life to lead.
Not that I am saying all HCPs are like this.
But where faced with an artificial parent-child scenario, and when we are trying to cope with our diabetes, it is very easy to feel that we will be punished for not obeying the parent. And threats like," If you do not follow what you are told you will get complications later" is a really underhand way sometimes to force something they call compliance. "Do as I say " (but I do not have to because I am the boss and do not have your illness).
"What do you need"? is the far better approach.
We are not all the same. The question is not how will they remould you into their idea of what is best for you.
The question is how can they be flexible enough to help you tailor management of your diabetes to your lifestyle and needs. ?
Yes, certain parameters may apply regards best range of BSLs and keeping weight in a flexible and comfortable-for-you range.
But if you were to do a survey of people in general, how many do not have breakfast? How many do not have lunch? Do some have high tea and then dinner?
Years ago I was so thrilled when I went onto the Novorapid (Australian brand of your Novarapid) and twice daily Levemir (at my insistence not the doctor's) because it gave me that flexibility I needed. I could skip lunch if I was busy - no more pressure to eat all meals on time because my previous insulins did not allow for such choice.
You are a human being doing her very best to cope with diabetes. You do not need to be brow-beaten or to feel that way by anyone, particularly those of the helping professions.
Be as brave as you can and state what you need. Make out a list of such needs and require (no pleading, just quietly request and keep doing so) that your health team adapt to your needs, not you to theirs'.
How to deal with fear that you will upset your nurse? Think about how her demands are upsetting you! How did you and your peers deal with bossy teachers at school? ? By giving them nicknames? And nicknames can be terms of endearment not necessarily wicked ones. Nurse "3 meals per day", "High and Mighty" etc. Humour is a great way to dispel fear. And developing self humour can help: If the nurse ass how the injection technique is going, You could say something: "Oh, you mean javelin practice"? Whatever way you find to make it light hearted. And I always consider blaming the weather if BSLS are not as good as I (I, not thems out there) would like. And the diabetes gremlins are out and about, for doing good and others doing nefarious things. Over time our experience helps us solve some of these mysteries (as well as our use of supportive forums like this one), and helpful health professionals.
Maybe wear something which makes you feel strong and protected, a favourite vest, cardigan, hat etc. Anything which can distract someone a little as you go to your appointment with the nurse.( opps flashback to the movie: One Flew Over the Cuckcoo's Nest and the nurse in that) (Laugh, smile, secret blush at the wicked thought of making such a comparison)!!
Or take along a support person if that is possible and you are comfortable with that.
Sometimes, in hindsight, I wished two things could have happened with certain encounters
1. that I had been able to record the conversation and play it back to the person
2. that I had a dog with me who would have broken up any heated exchanges and use of uncomfortable tone of voice!
You are free to imagine you have a dog with you, who loves and supports you and woofs (in the imagination) to keep you calm and focussed on defusing the escalation that you might fear. (I have done this sometimes and as far as i know I am not insane, but who knows) ?
After all, with the insulin regime they have selected for their own reasons, you have greater flexibility to make it your own.
If the attitude and behaviour of your DN remains unchanged you may need to find one who is not authoritarian, but flexible, who listens and works with you. Chin up and Best Wishes.
The Chinese character for the word "to listen" has the following components: Ears, Eyes, Heart, Undivided Attention.
That is what to expect from your health provider. Signing off, Kite Doctor, Mere Mortal.
