Hi Jenna, you have had me in tears

it was bad enough losing my baby at 3 months into the pregnancy let alone losing one so far into it as you did, I really am so sorry for your loss

. Something in me is really reluctant to try again because as much as we want one, I really don't think I could cope with losing one so far along in the pregnancy, and lets face it they won't give us the help we need until we have already lost them, which is then too late, it really is a case of do I try and maybe face the pain of losing another baby or just give up and have the pain of wanting one, I really don't know what to do

I'm just fed up hearing all this cr*p that diabetes doesn't have to ruin your life and stop you doing what you want cause it sure as hell is ruining mine and stopping me getting what I want , and a lot of others I have got to know.
I have asked time and time again for a pump but they just don't listen or the rare times they do , at the next appointment it is never mentioned and convieniently forgotten about, the DN did mention one at my last appoinment but I am expecting the same as usual that it wont get mentioned again next time i go but I will ask. I have everything I could possibly need here for a baby except of course the baby itself , It's all packed away, but I'm seriously just thinking of selling the lot and giving up, I have lost my fighting mood at the moment just haven't got the energy to fight anymore, I keep losing

I just can't take it anymore it's like banging your head against a brick wall with these people they just don't understand the pain of losing a child if they did they would help more and take it more seriously

. I have now been put onto Lantus instead of the Levemir and it has stopped the bouncing big time but my BGs are still too high to try for a baby anyway at the moment so I dont know what our next step will be ,as like I said, at the moment I just can't decide and am too messed up in the head to know what I want to do, but I think I would only be brave enough to try again if I am given a pump which I doubt will ever happen but when we do decide I will let you know , big hugs to you and my thoughts are with you and your little angel mason I hope next time goes well for you and you get the healthy little one you desire xxx