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How did your partner react when you told him/her you have diabetes?

Discussion in 'Diabetes Discussions' started by Lana F, Apr 16, 2015.

  1. Lana F

    Lana F Type 1 · Member

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    I was diagnosed with type 1 diabetes when I was 25 years old; after the diagnosis, I did some dating, but never actually settled down with anyone and never got married (or had children). I know in this day and age, what with diabetes being so popular, telling someone you have diabetes is no big deal. It once had a stigma attached to it, but that was years ago! Now, people just take it in stride. In fact, people almost expect you to have it, nowadays! When I go to the clinic, the first thing they ask you is: Do you have diabetes? They don't ask " do you have cancer?" Or, "do you have multiple sclerosis?" Or, " do you have asthma?" They ask if you have diabetes, like it's commonplace! And the scary part is, more patients say Yes than No. (Obviously, me being one of them!) When I was first diagnosed more than 15 years ago, it was just getting started; and after I was diagnosed, it seems like everyone else I knew "came down with it" soon thereafter! All my life, people were telling me my eating habits were atrocious, so when I told people I had it, they weren't even surprised! And when I told my dates, they all took it in stride. I thought they'd make a bigger deal of it, but they never did. And what's more, they all knew someone who had it, too. What about you? How long have you had diabetes and how did your partner(s) take the news? Thanks for sharing!
     
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  2. Scandichic

    Scandichic Type 2 · Well-Known Member

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    Told partner. Started LCHF. He joined me. Nuff said!
     
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  3. donnellysdogs

    donnellysdogs Type 1 · Master

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    Was diabetic with hubby 1 & 2 and boyfriends (not in that order!!-:)), never bothered them. They love(d) me for who I am. I just tjink I have a bigger personality than my diabetes!!
    It has rarely ruled my life either.
     
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  4. Lana F

    Lana F Type 1 · Member

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    Cool beans! But in all fairness, love is one thing -- concern is something else entirely. I'm sure they were all concerned and/or worried. You can love someone and still be concerned. In fact, doesn't love pretty much automatically imply concern? Didn't they express ANY concern at all? Personally, I never had a serious partner, but friends and family -- they weren't surprised when they found out. That's not to say they weren't worried for my wellbeing. I don't know, maybe I'm making a bigger deal out of this than it really is, but...is it JUST me or does diabetes NOT worry people as much these days, anymore? Like it's no big thing? Like, "eh, diabetes, so what? Take a little insulin and you're a-OK." Kind of like that. Maybe I'm just old-fashioned or maybe I think too much of diabetes, but to me, diabetes is a pretty big deal. When you think about all the bad stuff that can happen (even though I try not to focus on the bad stuff), it makes you wonder why everyone acts like it's nothing. Maybe everyone just puts too much faith into insulin or something. When did diabetes become so..."normal?" *sigh*
     
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  5. Lana F

    Lana F Type 1 · Member

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    According to your forum profile, the LCHF diet seems to be working for you! Congrats on the weight loss! I think I know why your partner was easily persuaded, though. I bet he gets to eat a lot of meat (and bacon!) on a low carb high fat diet! So much for the potatoes in that equation, though! LOL Just out of curiosity -- who lost the most weight? You or your partner? They say men lose weight a lot faster than women. Inquiring minds want to know! ;-)
     
  6. Scandichic

    Scandichic Type 2 · Well-Known Member

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    I lost the most - I had the most to lose! He lost 2.5 stone in 3 months and now maintains. I am going through a plateau at the moment but am not too dispondent. This happens and it will start again when it feels like it. It's frustrating initially but you just have to go with the flow.
     
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  7. tim2000s

    tim2000s Type 1 · Expert
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    Like many early onset T1s, my partner learned about it pretty early on when we were dating. It was something I was and still am very upfront about. There have been diabetic moments, basically a couple of hypos, one of which saw me very low first thing in the morning and apparently being a total arse and very unpleasant to her (which I have no memory of at all) where she had to call the ambulance, but otherwise, yes there is concern, but nothing too difficult to deal with.
     
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  8. donnellysdogs

    donnellysdogs Type 1 · Master

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    I was told that diabetes lives with me, not me living with diabetes so this may be whyI don't see it as too much of an impact upon me.

    I've had one major concern regarding driving which did have a big impact that I will never forget and sure there's jobs that we are banned from but theres plenty of other jobs around.

    Sure we have to test and inject as T1's but some people have colostomy/ileostomy bags to empty and I know which I prefer to do.

    Its never stopped me being me so people accept, love and support me as me. (Except mum who has always felt guilty at giving me a diabetic gene and see's me as her diabetic daughter, rather than her daughter-but thats mum's).

    Concern happens in all humans...but I don't think my friends, family have ever seen diabetes in my life as an overly concern that has to be compensated in someway...
     
    #8 donnellysdogs, Apr 17, 2015 at 8:08 AM
    Last edited by a moderator: Apr 17, 2015
  9. Robinredbreast

    Robinredbreast Type 1 · Oracle

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    Hmmm, I am female and find it hard to have diabetes accepted, my son tried to set me up with a guy he knows, my son rang me and the guy he was talking too, an acquaintance told him he was lonely and would like to meet someone. My son showed him a photo of me on his phone, guy was interested and I said to my son can you mention that I have type 1 diabetes and the guy said no problem that's okay, gave him a contact and he didn't get in touch. I knew he wouldn't. So it is not always acceptable, especially as you get older. I wouldn't of normally said anything about diabetes first off, but I had a feeling..............and I was right, It's his loss then.
     
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  10. Mike d

    Mike d Type 2 · Expert

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    Got support from day #1. Even more now. Nothing less than I would give to her if she had the same condition but it's always a lot to ask of someone else.

    I will never be able to pay her back. Guess I did get lucky :)
     
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  11. Clivethedrive

    Clivethedrive Type 2 · Well-Known Member

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    You are right ,but you also are wise enough to realise it's not your problem(s) and carry on enjoying your life,well done rrb, ::))
     
  12. Jaylee

    Jaylee Type 1 · Moderator
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    In answer to the question..? It kind of went somthing like this....

     
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  13. urbanracer

    urbanracer Type 1 · Expert
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    My partner works as a nurse in a nursing home. She told me I had diabetes before I saw the doc.
     
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  14. gemma6549

    gemma6549 · Guest

    I don't think I've ever met anyone that has cared that I'm diabetic, other than my husband saying I'm a miserable cow :) but that's part and parcel of being a wife I say.
     
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  15. moonchip

    moonchip Type 2 · Well-Known Member

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    Told my wife the day I was diagnosed and she has, as always, been wonderfully supportive

    As others have said, diabetes is just a part of me it doesn't define me any more than wearing glasses, having a beard, being incredibly good looking, my humility & humbleness or being mega intelligent ....... we all have our crosses to bear :D:D:D:D
     
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  16. Jaylee

    Jaylee Type 1 · Moderator
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    Many years ago I was in a relationship with am Amy Winehouse type.. Who used to get out of any sensible discussion when she was wrong or found out. (Especially regarding finance or her habitual drug use.) by saying "you need to eat something". :rolleyes:

    I have never had any issue with anyone else. Ever... Miserable? I don't put that one in my wife's job description... :cool:
     
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  17. Heathenlass

    Heathenlass Type 1 · Well-Known Member

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    Nice husband you have :confused:

    Signy
     
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  18. gemma6549

    gemma6549 · Guest

    The best actually, I'm very lucky :)
     
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  19. gemma6549

    gemma6549 · Guest


    He says he would always tell people not to go out with a diabetic :) what he doesn't realise is it's probably just me that's the problem ;)
     
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  20. Robinredbreast

    Robinredbreast Type 1 · Oracle

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    I think you are incredibly lucky and it's great reading all the positive posts, thumbs up guys :)
     
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