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Living with non diabetic

N

nsh2111

Well-Known Member
Messages
321
Type of diabetes
Type 2
Treatment type
Diet only
So my wife is non diabetic and she can eat what she wants.

Over last year and half i have been very low carb with occasional cheat meals.
Over last year and half, its has also become very difficult to have a meal together. She makes effort and we have had many meals together which are keto/ high fat but I also dont want her to have fat heavy diet while still eating more carbs than me.

So I would like to ask people ( in similar situation as me) , how do you manage to keep balance between having a family meal but still keeping low carb. She is now feeling that only thing we ever eat is cauliflower and spinach.

She understands my situation but I would like to find the right balance where none of us are feeling that we are missing out on food.
 
Hubby does his own version of lc after seeing what it did for me. We will enjoy such meals as cottage pie, shepherd's pie, topped with either celeriac or cauliflower mash. Cauliflower cheese, basic or variations such as adding mushrooms, onions, bacon, broccoli, leek etc. Use different types of cheese. I currently have brisket in the IP. Hubby will have a bread roll with his.
 
My husband and I used to have the same meals, the only difference being that if he wants carbs then he has them, but mainly (except for pasta) he sticks to the low carb 'carb immitations' like cauli rice, roast radishes and celeriac and swede mash which he actually prefers now.
 
My OH is non-diabetic.

Routinely we have differening, but similar breakfasts - I have yoghurt with rhubarb, and he has fruit with yoghurt. At the moment, overseas, his breakfast is the same, although different fruits, whilst I have hard boiled eggs and some salad.

Lunchtimes, I usually have quite a large salad and he has a sandwich. Overseas, we are largely leaving lunch aside.

Dinner we always have the same, except he has the carrier bits added. Overseas, because we eat out every night, we may or may not have the same main course, but he will have rice or noodles with his, and I don't.

So, where our differences lie I see inthe proportions. I'll have more veg and fats, whereas he'll have less fat, but some carbs.

It works fine for us.
 
nsh2111 said:
She makes effort and we have had many meals together which are keto/ high fat
Click to expand...
It’s admirable that your wife is making the effort.. What effort do you feel that you’re making to finding the right balance?
 
My non diabetic wife does most of the cooking and cooks what she wants to eat. I try to make my low carb requirement as little extra work as possible so, whenever possible, I just modify what she is having. If she is doing a roast dinner with roast potatoes I cut up some butternut squash and stick it in with the potatoes. If she is doing a curry with rice, I microwave a pack of cauliflower rice. If she is making a pasta dish I make some courgetti. You get the idea. Of course it doesn't always work, some meals like paella you can't leave out the carbs so I have something else. It would be more difficult if I was keto rather than moderately low carb.
 
Well my view is that she can eat what she wants and so can you. Why should somebody who doesn't have diabetes have to eat like they do? As others have said, if you are sharing mealtimes then she can add whatever carbs she wants and you can add alternatives. When I was first diagnosed I will admit I felt a bit jealous when I saw my other half wolfing down carbs like there was no tomorrow but now?, well so what, lucky him. In the end you are responsible for what you eat and what you may have to 'miss out' on...she doesn't have to miss out on anything.
 
Many many non diabetic spouses can still benefit from eating this way ! e.g. my overweight but not diabetic yet husband. My kids can be a little more liberal with their carbs and it is easy to cook some rice or jacket potatoes to supplement the main event.
My point is that this shouldn't feel like a terribly deprived diet which is only suitable for health freaks and diabetics!
Maybe you are just in a bit of a low carb rut and need to add some new recipes to get re inspired?
Try https://www.dietdoctor.com/low-carb/recipes/top-30
or
 
therower said:
It’s admirable that your wife is making the effort.. What effort do you feel that you’re making to finding the right balance?
Click to expand...
I will have carbs ( limited amount) to give her company and also find recipes which we both can eat and she doesnt feel left out
 
My problem is that my non diabetic grandson often will not eat my low carb meals because they are to carby for him I have cooked a meal with say 10-15 grams of carb in the whole meal and he has point blank refused to eat it bizarre situation to be in.
 
thanks all.

I should have mentioned that I am Indian so staple diet is lots of carbs. Looks like I need to find the recipes where its easy to substitute carbs so she can have what she wants and I can have non carb stuff.


Its just not possible with most of the stuff. e.g lentils, kidney beans, potato curry , fresh chapati ( bread) . You get the idea.

Still lots of good suggestion. I will try to be a bit more liberal in my carb intake and find such options where we can swap carbs.

Lets see how it fits with my next hbac.
 
I cook the meat (we both eat it)
My husband cooks the veg, potatoes, etc. etc (he eats that)

works very well.

although I have to say that while I love good food (cooked well, love variety, quality ingredients, home cooked good nutrition and adore a wide range of dishes), I am not interested in the phaff that comes with dishes like shepherds pie or lasagne. Why prep the mince, the sauces, and the pasta/potato separately, then combine them in another dish (more washing up!) and cook them all over again? That is just make work.

So we tend to cook the mince, cook the carbs and then combine on the plate (spaghetti bolognese style). Those that eat carbs do, those that don’t, don’t.

You mention a limited range of veg.
No reason why your wife’s veg options need to be restricted at all. Your plates don’t need to match.
And I suggest you test your reactions to all sorts of veg, to see what works for you. Please don’t rely on just a few stock veg. Test, experiment, sample. Build up a range of foods you enjoy AND tolerate.
 
My wife is non-diabetic and can eat pretty well anything she likes, including cake, chocs, bread and potatoes, which are completely out for me.
I have no breakfast and my wife has porridge. For lunch, she typically has smoked salmon and watercress with toast, while I have a keto salad. For evening meals, she does without potatoes and we typically have pan-fried fish (in butter) with green veg.
It is difficult for us both, but we manage to eat together, which I feel is very important.
 
My son comes over for a meal once a week. He is underweight and doesn't always eat well so I always try to give him a decent meal. For dinner I do either chicken or salmon with a variety of veg - I get extra green veg and/or cauliflower rice and he gets some rice or potato - if lunch then I make a large salad and he gets extra tomato, etc. and a slice of bread (although I only buy high protein bread now).
He doesn't really notice the difference, his meals are pretty much the same as before.
If doing a pud, I make something like almond crumble over rhubarb sweetened with stevia (truvia) and served with real egg custard - but I keep a packet of birds instant custard in and add a little to his portion! Or he gets other fruit and I have greek yogurt with raspberries which he doesn't like.

I didn't switch to high fat apart from dairy - swapping to full fat milk (but I use less of it), eating a bit more cheese, having full fat Greek yogurt, and having double cream on my seed porridge. I can't get used to butter on veg or oil dressings on salad after decades of trying to lose weight the old way! You could keep some skimmed milk in if he prefers it?
 

I like to do a lot of oven cooking. For example, like tonight, I’m the type 2, so I’ll have 2 salmon fillets, some feta cheese, 2 small baby tomatoes and a green salad. My husband will have the salad, feta and toms, along with battered cod and Strong Roots vegetable fries, which he loves. For pudding, I’ll have 25g each of pear and apple, he will have the rest and we also have sugar free jelly with full fat Greek yoghurt.

One large oven tray to do both meals, with my fillets in foil. Sorted!
 
Was just thinking, maybe you and your wife could do some batch cooking and freeze them. For example, if you are having a chicken curry, you could cook up the chicken for both of you and then separate portions of it, so that with your portions, you can make the necessary ingredient alterations needed for diabetes and your wife can have her regular curry ingredients. This way, you’ll both be eating the same kind of thing, but different. So long as you don’t get them mixed up! Then, your wife cooks up some of her regular rice and you can have cauliflower rice with yours.
 
Watch out feeding youngsters on nutritious options - I was cooking low carb when bringing up my two and they are both tall, well made and good looking - my son is well over 6ft tall, my daughter above average height, and they didn't half give me the run around when they were at home.
 
Haha. I laugh as I have been in a similar situation. There are 3 of us in our family, each with differing needs and wants food wise. It has been difficult but we have achieved a workable solution. Sometimes I am effectively preparing 3 meals at one sitting.

One way is that I simply cook pasta or rice or potatos just for them but we share the meat dish. I am learning to either not replace those on my plate or use grated cheese or cauliflower rice instead. I do have the occasional slice of low carb bread.

Another way is to cook something that we all like. Hard to do at times but it can be done, I cooked a chicken type pizza the other night, with chicken as the base instead of a bread base. They enjoyed that as much as I did. It worked.

We all have a full English type breakfast these days which also helps. Obviously anything carby I don’t have within that breakfast.

I did try and persuade my wife to go low carb (to help lose a few pounds) which would help but she lasted just a couple of days. She tends to try and avoid dairy products owing to lactose intolerance so that hasn’t helped.
 
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