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Looking for motivated friends

Sadnessnormal

Sadnessnormal

Member
I need friends who are diabetic like me. Am all alone. Does anyone what to be a friend to me. Am so depressed I can't tell no one in my family am diabetic because my brother just passed away from it. Aged 32.
 
Are you T1 or T2; I am guessing you are T1 if your brother passed away so young. If you look ar the T1 threads you will find lots of others in the same boat as you. I am T2 and an "oldie" like many other T2s although I a very untypical T2 as I am thin and was diagnosed when I went for my free NHS health check.
 
If I eat out I tend to have a steak or chicken and salad. Some soups are also OK. I miss the desert (was always my favourite course) and have a teaspoon of someone else's desert. I then sometimes have a liquer coffee while the others have their pud. I haven't had a problem with friends, rather the opposite. They sometimes say they can't have cake with their coffee as it isn't fair to me so I say "Well, everyone else around is having their cake so why not you as well? I really don't expect anyone not to have anything just because I can't". It seems a bit unkind for them to aviod you.

When I go to the Christmas lunch a very large friend always asks me to have my potatoes at the buffet and he wiill take temptation away from me when we get back to our table so he has a double portion; suits us well!!!!

I HATE being diabetic but there are a lot worse things to have so you just have to make the best of it. I hope you wil find some friends who really don't care if you are black, white, short, tall, thin, fat, diabetic or anything else.
 
The point of the matter for me is I can't tell my family am diabetic. Just because of my brother passing. Am forced to isolate myself and to be honest I don't want the pity from friends.
 
Why can't you tell your family; i am sure they would be keen to help you especially after the tragic loss of your brother? I am going out to lunch with my son and his family and some other members of the family on Sunday week as it is his birthday. I will have to find something I can eat; it will not be as enjoyable as meals out were before I knew I was diabetic when I could eat whatever I liked but I can go out and I can still eat so I make the best of it and enjoy the day out. There are a lot of people in the world who don't have enough to eat so not being able to eat exactly what I would like still leaves me in the fortunate band of people who have plenty to eat and never have to go hungry.

I hope your family will give you help and support Good luck.
 
I am sorry for your loss. I too lost a brother, he took his own life aged 27. Although it was thirty years ago it still cuts deep.

I try to explain to people that at the time it is like a new saw and cuts deep, as the years go by the teeth blunt but it can still cut if you slip and are unaware. I hope you find the forum a good source of support and guidance

Regards

Mart
 
Am so sorry I know how you feel no matter how long it's been it's still hurts that's so true.
I do hope I get some encouragement here as I know my family will only panic if I tell them my mom is already sick from my brothers passing and when she heard I feel ill she thought I was dying and she was admitted into hospital so imagine me telling her the exact thing that took my brothers life I have it what it would do to her? I mean I won't do what he did he forced on losing weight more than being healthy.
 
The first thing I would say is to realise the exact cause of what caused the death of your brother. Just saying diabetes is a bit wide open as a cause as most peoples deaths from diabetes are linked to other causes may be from diabetes but not necessarily diabetes.

You do not have to tell friends or family if your current situation makes it difficult..

You can adjust your diet without having to tell people the reasons why. It depends on whether you live at home, whether you do food shopping, whether you are normal weight, on tablets or been put on injections etc. depends also whether you have a good diabetes team around you.

We will support you through this time of adjusting and help you to make any adjustments etc. there are many people that are diabetic who do not widely advertise the fact. It is possible to balance your life without telling direct friends and family... Although on a longer term basis it would be easier to find a way to tell them.

Sounds as if you are struggling a bit as I read that you feel ill, so it sounds as if your blood levels may not be within normal ranges yet.

There are a vast amount of people that have lived with diabetes for a very long time. It sepends upon how you manage it. I don't know the circumstances of how diabetes affected your brother and how he died from it at such a young age... But this does not mean that you are going to....

We are here for you as friends and support you along your way...
Sxx
 
I told people soon after my diagnosis; I am a very untypical type2 as I am slim and active. By telling them it explained why I could no longer eat cake, biscuits, bread, potatoes; the list goes on. It also shows that maybe we should all be a bit more aware of looking after ourselves by eating well, getting enough sleep and trying to cut down on our stress levels as we don't know what our genes are going to throw at us.
 
My brother had diabetes type 2. Which then lead to kidney failure. Gallstones and kidney stones high cholesterol and in all hypertensive heart disease. That's the full least according to the autopsy. He focus like I said on losing weight rather than being wise and healthy.
I on the other hand never had diabetes until he died. I was told I forced it on myself because I became highly stressed when I say highly I mean HIGHLY STRESSED. Then everything came crashing down.
I fell ill because of hbp but was OK after a while but I knew something was wrong and got tested and it came back diabetic.
Since then I have been struggling cause am not use to eating two meals a day. Am trying my best to do so. But my blood sugars are finally under control expect for eating those to meals. Am trying.
As much as I respect those who have been diagnosed from it for long I just don't want it. Nothing in this world will consolidate me for the death of my brother from it. Am not scared of dying but I am scared of telling my family. Everyone knows their families I do.
I do really appreciate everyone talking to me here as am not a big talker but if am going to get support I know I have too.
Am just worried when my fiancé gets back I have to inform him that the love of his life is diabetic and need constant care when we conceive because having kids is very important to him.
 
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