Please help with advice, t2 diabetes erratic since death of my mother

Hi @Beth mck , welcome to the forum.

Beth mck said:

My mother passed away in July and I cared for her for 6 months while she was end of life, I have been under a lot of stress due to this and I have not been looking after my health or my diet

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I'm sorry to hear about your mum. I cared for my father during his last months, 9 years ago. Life events like this tend to push everything else, including your own needs to the back burner, and that's ok.

Are you ready to take the bull by the horns again now?
If so I'd start with looking at your usual diet and see if you can make tweaks. https://josekalsbeek.blogspot.com/2019/11/the-nutritional-thingy.html is a good place to start, it's written by @JoKalsbeek who also lost her mum this year, which caused her some struggles with her diabetes.

Beth mck said:

My last HBA1C has went up by 14 points and Is now high

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May I ask what your last hba1c was? Are you in touch with your HCP for your diabetes?

Beth mck said:

Hi

I am 37 years old and a type 2 for the last 5 years, controlled by diet and metformin

My last HBA1C has went up by 14 points and Is now high and I am very scared of what will happen next

My mother passed away in July and I cared for her for 6 months while she was end of life, I have been under a lot of stress due to this and I have not been looking after my health or my diet

My blood sugars are very erratic and can go from 5 to 15 in the same day and I am really struggling to get them under control

Any advice would be greatly appreciated

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OK.

I’ve been there with my T2 dad. I helped him pass on after constant support for 8 years.
Don’t beat yourself up, you did your best & made your mother proud.

Sorry you have joined under your circumstances. You have a warm welcome to this forum..
The time is now yours to keep your family memory alive. Focus on you.

Bests wishes.

Beth mck said:

Hi

Thank you

I was diagnosed at 32 after being gestational diabetic during my pregnancy at 30 and then putting on more weight after birth

I am poorly controlling it with diet due to over eating with stress and I have also been missing my metformin when I was caring for my mother

I know I agoukd jave looked after myself better but I just want to be back on track

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There's no-one here who's going to tell you you should've looked after yourself. You were in overwhelming circumstances and then sometimes, our own medical issues get put to the side for a bit. As you've gathered by now, quite a few of us have been in your shoes, and found that juggling self-care and caring and grieving for a loved one was far, far from easy. After mom passed and I got back on track eventually, but my regained weight remained, even while my blood sugars got back to their non-diabetic selves. The perks of (peri-?) menopause cropping up. Sometimes things just work against us, and we don't always have control over them. Life happens to us. It just does. So not a single person here is going to kick you around for that simple, out-of-your-hands fact. But you're here now, and that means you're looking to get back on top of things.

Basically, cut carbs where you can, and show yourself some kindness. Those are the most pressing things for you now, and you decide which of those has priority. Which can shift by the minute. Welcome here, and I am so very, very sorry for your loss. Hang in there.

Hugs,
Jo

Another warm welcome @Beth mck

You have been dealing with an extremely challenging time. It is extremely hard to prioritise yourself in any way when you are a caregiver. I am sure your mum was extremely grateful to have your care and your presence at the end of her life.

I agree with @JoKalsbeek that one of your priorities now is to show yourself some kindness. Much easier said than done but very important. If you are feeling up to the challenge then maybe try to reduce your carb intake. There are many ways to do it- the best way is the way that is achievable for you at the moment. So you don't have to go all in if that's too hard at the moment.

Read around the forum- there are many wonderful people here who are only too willing to help with support and advice.

Take care of yourself and welcome.

Beth mck said:

Thank you for all your kind comments. This has made me feel easier

My levels have gone from 56 to 70 in 6 months, I am scared and do not want to have to take insulin

I am going to try my hardest to bring it down, I have got terrible anxiety around my diabetes now and panic if my sugars are a little low (6 or under) I then over eat to.bring them up which is a terrible habit I need to break

I have read lots of the threads and they are very helpful

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Anxiety, like stress, is a major cause of high readings, and you have no need to be anxious about readings in the 6s being too low.

I too cared for my elderly parent to the end, and combined with supporting both my daughters going through messy divorces at the same time, the effect of Covid lockdown on my business, and other stressful life matters, my HbA1c went from 54 to 88.

However, after my parent passed and all the legal stuff was wound up, I stepped back from being there 24/7 for daughters (emergencies only), closed my business and retired, returned to this forum, took up LCHF again and at the last review was sitting at 65.

Yrs, drastic measures, but I had to get stress and anxiety out of my life to basically save my life.

I am currently working on reducing my BG to below 6, and life is good.

You have so much support here, and you can sound off or ask questions whenever you need. Take a deep breath, know we are here for you, and relax.

Wonderful! May you go from strength to strength. This time is about YOU now. We are all here for you.