Really down...losing my mind

[Shady-Twist]

Feeling really down tonight. I'm 38, T2. For a long time now...years... I've noticed more and more issues with my brain - can't find the right words for things, can't think on my feet, forget things within a couple of minutes.... I thought it would get better as I got my sugars under control but my last 2 HBA1Cs have been 39 (from 140!) and I feel worse! It's getting to the point where I can't talk to people face to face at work because my brain just doesn't work fast enough and then tonight I nearly hit someone in my car because I pulled out onto a roundabout when I shouldn't have.

I have got a lot on my plate right now - fertility issues, eating a strict diet to maintain my sugars, normal everyday life..etc... and this is aggravating my anxiety and depression anyway, which in turn is probably making my brain worse, but it's getting so bad, feeling too bad to carry on working, but I need to work to survive and my GP just shrugs it off.....

Don't know what I'm asking really, just wanted to reach out

 

[joss.t2]

Hi have you considered pcos polysistic ovary syndrome? A lot of your symptoms fit. You may see some similarities for yourself espesially with fertility probs. Maybe xtra hair growth. Insulin resistance. Type2 diabeties ect. Myo inoositol may help but you need to ask DOCTOR first. I probably wont be able to get on here again. (Cos i have memory probs too) i think when my sugar is high. Hope you find your answer quickly. Bye

 

[PatsyB]

Hope you get sorted and soon feel much better

 

[CarbsRok]

Feeling really down tonight. I'm 38, T2. For a long time now...years... I've noticed more and more issues with my brain - can't find the right words for things, can't think on my feet, forget things within a couple of minutes.... I thought it would get better as I got my sugars under control but my last 2 HBA1Cs have been 39 (from 140!) and I feel worse! It's getting to the point where I can't talk to people face to face at work because my brain just doesn't work fast enough and then tonight I nearly hit someone in my car because I pulled out onto a roundabout when I shouldn't have.

I have got a lot on my plate right now - fertility issues, eating a strict diet to maintain my sugars, normal everyday life..etc... and this is aggravating my anxiety and depression anyway, which in turn is probably making my brain worse, but it's getting so bad, feeling too bad to carry on working, but I need to work to survive and my GP just shrugs it off.....

Don't know what I'm asking really, just wanted to reach out

Hi Shady-Twist go and see another GP one who will listen. Write down all your symptoms and ask if you can be seen by the memory clinic. If you have diabetes the first thing you are diagnosed with is it's your diabetes, so after discounting that diagnoses suggest they look further. Stress/depression can cause your problems as can ME and MS. Do insist that you have a full assessment so what ever your problem it can be sorted.

Have you also done the very basic and tested to see if you are having low blood sugars when your speech slurs?
That was the first thing my GP asked me then sent me straight for a brain scan.

 

[maisiepug]

I am so glad you posted this, I thought I was the only one and that I was going insane. It is just like you have been in my house and in my head, I am getting so bad at times that I feel like I am in a different place and looking at someone else. I used to have a really good brain and could remember everything, do loads of things at the same time etc, but now some days it is impossible for me to do the basics. I have been having trouble getting my sugars under control lately and I think this is due to my inability to function some times. I have had to give up driving (my decision) because I can't remember things and I don't want to put anyone in danger. I have tried talking to my Dr about it but he just says what do you expect at your age, ( I am only 62) after the new year I am going to see if there is anything I can do myself or bite the bullet and go and see him again.
Perhaps we can help each other out Shady and keep in touch.
Hope you feel better soon although it is so hard

 

[Alisonjane10]

Hi @Shady-Twist. It sounds like you're having a pretty horrible time of it right now. The way you describe your inability to concentrate, poor motivation, increased anxiety & feelings of helplessness suggest symptoms of clinical depression. And indeed, you do share with us that you're feeling depressed & anxious right now. You haven't indicated whether you're receiving treatment for this though. Stress & anxiety tend to be self perpetuating, and have an enormous mental and physical effect upon our wellbeing. This can manifest itself in all of the symptoms you're describing. As overwhelming as it may be for you right now...with help & appropriate treatment, there is hope & a way forward. I work within adult mental health, & I'm also a sufferer of depression/anxiety myself. Your comments resonate with me on a personal level too.

If you aren't receiving treatment for the symptoms you're describing, perhaps it's time to visit your GP again & have an open, honest discussion about how you're feeling. You say you feel too ill to carry on working, suggesting you're not coping right now. Perhaps you would benefit from a break from work. The routine of work is helpful for many in a similar situations to yourself. Whilst others welcome the time off to concentrate on seeking treatment & recovering. A break may provide some relief, and release some of the pressure. But, all of these suggestions are things you should be discussing with your GP. It might be useful to write down your concerns, (just as you have when introducing this thread topic,) & use it as a prompt if you do decide to seek help from your doctor. If you're finding the relationship with your usual GP unhelpful, you can always ask to see another partner in the surgery, if it's a group practice that is. It may be your first step on the road to recovery.

I wish you well. My very best wishes to you & yours.

 

[kevinfitzgerald]

Hi there @Shady-Twist. So sorry to hear what your going through at the moment. You say you have anxiety and depression but you didn't state if you were taking any medication for this.

I suffer with Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD) and can also get depressed but for me the anxiety is the catalyst. It is just a matter of severity !

I have suffered with this debilitating condition all my life and I have been put on the majority of SSRI anti depressants to no avail. Citalopram, Sertraline, Amitriptyline, (Proponolol which is a beta blocker) and I have just come off of Fluoxitine.

I have now after many many years just been put on a medication which I've been told is licensed to treat GAD called Duloxitine. Hopefully this will help with the anxiety because it has blighted me since my earliest childhood memory but only time will tell !

Don't give up, keep going. As @Alisonjane10 states I work in the mental health field also and support adults with major depressive illness and schizophrenia. I can definitely relate personally to your post and I wish you the very very best in finding some relief.

I agree that you need to sit down and talk to a Dr that will listen and give you his/her time. Tell them everything and rule out nothing but what you describe sounds very much like your mental state rather than your diabetes (though I may be wrong)

If the anxiety is worse than your depression ask for specific anti depressant medication that is used to treat anxiety disorders, there are a few out there.

There will be a few (if not more) of us on here that will relate to what your going through so believe me you are not alone.

My sincerest thoughts are with you. Good luck.

Kev

 

[Daphne917]

Hi @Shady-Twist welcome to the forum. Just a couple of thoughts - are you on statins and have you been tested for under-active Thyroid as these may also be contributing to the way you feel?

 

[Larissima]

Just an additional idea - you say you're on a strict diet to control your blood sugar levels. Is it low carb, and are you eating enough healthy fats to give you energy and fuel your brain? Especially oily fish like salmon. Some people even take Omega 3 supplements, fish or krill oil to help brain function. Good luck, I hope you feel better soon!

 

[Totto]

Hi @Shady-Twist
Memory loss and dementia-like problems are common in hypothyroidism. Get your thyroid properly checked, not only TSH but FT4 and perferably FT3 too, and antibodies. Fertility problems, depression, fatigue, joint pain, weight problems and a lot more are some other common signs and symptoms.
If you are TTC you want TSH below 2,5 or even below 2 but then most people want that anyway. The upper range for TSH is waay too high.

 

[DavidGrahamJones]

I have got a lot on my plate right now - fertility issues, eating a strict diet to maintain my sugars, normal everyday life..etc... and this is aggravating my anxiety and depression anyway, which in turn is probably making my brain worse, but it's getting so bad, feeling too bad to carry on working, but I need to work to survive and my GP just shrugs it off.....

Apologies if already mentioned, I can see that several people have mentioned anxiety and depression but possibly not the side effects, there are also several other things that have been suggested for you to consider.

I've highlighted anxiety and depression because was wondering if you are being prescribed anything.
Many years ago I was prescribed Rosiglitazone for my diabetes and my weight started to go up immediately, I reported back to GP who prescribed Citilapram because I was so anxious. It certainly worked well on the anxiety, I ended up 7 stone heavier.The worst thing was that I was walking around like a zombie. Although I was unemployed at the time, there was no way I would have been able to carry out the sort of tasks that would be expected of me (IT Consultant - Mainframe database admin).

It's been some years since I stopped the Rosiglitazone (liver function deteriorated) and Citilapram (I stopped against GP's advice). Since then my memory has become a problem and I know how frustrating it can be when a GP doesn't take you seriously.

Don't let the barstewards get you down, you will find the answer, hopefully quite soon, don't give up.

 

[jpscloud]

I sometimes feel like this, but I don't know where it comes from. I can only say I'm sorry you are going through it and wish you well - with a big virtual hug if you want one.

 

[Shady-Twist]

Thanks for all your replies, sorry for not getting back sooner, Christmas has been v.busy. Unfortunately things are bad for me again tonight and I'm alone and really down.

To answer your suggestions - I haven't got PCOS and my thyroid function is normal, well TSH is anyway. I was on 20mg Citalopram a day for A&D, but came off it as I'm trying to get pregnant. That was an enormous battle in itself and I never want to have to go through that again! But I am really struggling now......

It's my birthday today and I feel awful!

 

[yakudueye1]

Feeling really down tonight. I'm 38, T2. For a long time now...years... I've noticed more and more issues with my brain - can't find the right words for things, can't think on my feet, forget things within a couple of minutes.... I thought it would get better as I got my sugars under control but my last 2 HBA1Cs have been 39 (from 140!) and I feel worse! It's getting to the point where I can't talk to people face to face at work because my brain just doesn't work fast enough and then tonight I nearly hit someone in my car because I pulled out onto a roundabout when I shouldn't have.

I have got a lot on my plate right now - fertility issues, eating a strict diet to maintain my sugars, normal everyday life..etc... and this is aggravating my anxiety and depression anyway, which in turn is probably making my brain worse, but it's getting so bad, feeling too bad to carry on working, but I need to work to survive and my GP just shrugs it off.....

Don't know what I'm asking really, just wanted to reach out

 

[yakudueye1]

hope you feel better but dont worry about things you have no control over it . whilst i try to do what would boost my morale it would be better if you deal with one issue at a time as when things are not well dont dwell on them just think of what might change your luck on it. if possible join the gym or do what would boost your moods

 

[knackered]

Thanks for all your replies, sorry for not getting back sooner, Christmas has been v.busy. Unfortunately things are bad for me again tonight and I'm alone and really down.

To answer your suggestions - I haven't got PCOS and my thyroid function is normal, well TSH is anyway. I was on 20mg Citalopram a day for A&D, but came off it as I'm trying to get pregnant. That was an enormous battle in itself and I never want to have to go through that again! But I am really struggling now......

It's my birthday today and I feel awful!

Hi, how long ago did you come off the Citalopram? and how did you do this? was it gradually, or like me just stopped taking it?.

I stopped it (40mg a day) suddenly mid september and went through a nightmare as well. The dizzyness, wierd brain shock things, insomnia, all over the place emotionaly and worst of all, nasty and angry at the drop of a hat. Its gradually getting better but I feel just like you describe yourself at the moment too, all over the show, making mistakes, losing things, I just feel like I want to crawl into a hole and be quiet while I heal. I read somewhere that it takes six to nine months to get this stuff out of your system, so I still have a way to go. I will not be looking for any further help with my depresssion etc as the plus side is that I no longer feel like a bloody zombie sleeping fourteen hours a day and living in a mental fog when awake. That bloody tablet has ******** up a good eight years of my life, I'll never take another pill unless its a lifesaver.

I wrote a list of consequences to saying '****** the lot of it'! That was an eye opener!, nobody died and the world still turned.

You have my absolute sympathy dear, it is just horrible and unless you have been there, you cannot imagine the despair and darkness. Remember, its the people that care that suffer depression and anxiety, people that care, are precious.

This won't kill you, you will survive it and the sun will shine again now you are off that horrible tablet.

God bless and.... birthday

Steve.+++

 

[Totto]

Thanks for all your replies, sorry for not getting back sooner, Christmas has been v.busy. Unfortunately things are bad for me again tonight and I'm alone and really down.

To answer your suggestions - I haven't got PCOS and my thyroid function is normal, well TSH is anyway. I was on 20mg Citalopram a day for A&D, but came off it as I'm trying to get pregnant. That was an enormous battle in itself and I never want to have to go through that again! But I am really struggling now......

It's my birthday today and I feel awful!

Oh poor you!
Ask if you can have more extensive thyroid tests. Anyway, what was you TSH?

 

[Mike d]

It's my birthday today and I feel awful!

From a long distance from where you're at and I am, I wish you well. Sure others send their best as well

 

[Senga]

I hope you are feeling a bit better. This site is fantastic there is always someone willing to listen when you feel the need to get stuff off your chest. Take Care and I wish you all the best

 

[November1115]

Hey Shady-Twist hope you feeling better... all the best and take care big hugs xx

 

[RAPS_od]

I'm sending my best to you through the airwaves tonight. I really feel for you.
Diabetes does affect your emotions and your memory. Many diabetics are put on statins to help with blood pressure/cholesterol and statins affect your memory as well.
Don't let anyone tell you something is normal if you know it's not normal for you. Talk to your GP and if they don't listen, talk to the nurses. Ask for a new GP. When you notice something has changed (and drastically, from how you describe it), your health provider needs to lend you an ear and give you hope.
You have my full support behind you. Stay strong.