marybadlady
Member
- Messages
- 6
Hi all
So I'm writing this from bed feeling very sheepish and annoyed at myself. All month my BG monitor has been acting dodgy - claiming that the batteries were low when they were brand new and generally carrying on. I've been resolutely taking the back off the meter, rubbing the batteries, blowing into the workings etc as if it were some battle of wills that I could win with a machine. What a choob!
Anyway - yesterday lunchtime, it finally fell over and died. At this point I should point out that I did have another meter but it is the old freestyle mini and I stopped using it because I couldn't get hold of the strips for it, so no means of testing. I HATE not knowing what's going on, so as you can imagine, last night didn't go well. No idea what my sugars were doing and had fitful, panicky night's sleep with hideous dreams, where my BG monitor turned into a grenade and taking the strip out was akin to pulling the pin. Spent most of the night awake after that.
In the morning I shot my usual for breakfast and then went into work to ask the boss for time off to go and buy a new meter. Shop that had the one I was looking for was 15 mins walk away and off I toddled, only to have one of those blinding hypos on the way there. You know the ones where every time you blink it takes a while for your brain to compute the difference between the inside of your eye lids and what's in front of you. Arrived in the shop a sweaty, shaking mess and quietly waited in the queue, munching furiously on jelly beans despite not having a clue exactly how much I needed. The person serving me was new and hadn't worked out how to use the till or take card transactions so the whole thing took an age. This was a diabetes shop by the way and it didn't occur to me to mention to the server and her helper that I was suffering from a hypo and could I use the machine while they were working out the financials.
Got back to work and everyone is like: woah you look pale are you ok? And I'm like: yeah I'm just a bit tired, I'm fine. But I actually felt like a train had hit me and maybe carried off some of my internal organs into the bargain. All day I could barely concentrate as all my energy and focus was taken up trying to stop myself from crumpling into a heap under my desk and passing out. I will not give in I will not give in! But at 3.30 pm I gave in and went home early and have spent the last two hours passed out in bed in that hideous drugged feeling of sleep you get. All the while absolutely furious at myself.
I've had Type 1 for nearly 11 years now - you'd think I'd be used to it and organised by now. And you'd think I'd recognise when a hypo wipeout has happened and that there's no use fighting it. But I still refuse to accept that I'm not like everyone else and believe that mind can triumph over matter, be it symptoms, faulty BG monitors, the tide ... Because if I accept this, I will have let it win. It will be an admission that I am WEAK.
Something is wrong with this picture, no?
So I'm writing this from bed feeling very sheepish and annoyed at myself. All month my BG monitor has been acting dodgy - claiming that the batteries were low when they were brand new and generally carrying on. I've been resolutely taking the back off the meter, rubbing the batteries, blowing into the workings etc as if it were some battle of wills that I could win with a machine. What a choob!
Anyway - yesterday lunchtime, it finally fell over and died. At this point I should point out that I did have another meter but it is the old freestyle mini and I stopped using it because I couldn't get hold of the strips for it, so no means of testing. I HATE not knowing what's going on, so as you can imagine, last night didn't go well. No idea what my sugars were doing and had fitful, panicky night's sleep with hideous dreams, where my BG monitor turned into a grenade and taking the strip out was akin to pulling the pin. Spent most of the night awake after that.
In the morning I shot my usual for breakfast and then went into work to ask the boss for time off to go and buy a new meter. Shop that had the one I was looking for was 15 mins walk away and off I toddled, only to have one of those blinding hypos on the way there. You know the ones where every time you blink it takes a while for your brain to compute the difference between the inside of your eye lids and what's in front of you. Arrived in the shop a sweaty, shaking mess and quietly waited in the queue, munching furiously on jelly beans despite not having a clue exactly how much I needed. The person serving me was new and hadn't worked out how to use the till or take card transactions so the whole thing took an age. This was a diabetes shop by the way and it didn't occur to me to mention to the server and her helper that I was suffering from a hypo and could I use the machine while they were working out the financials.
Got back to work and everyone is like: woah you look pale are you ok? And I'm like: yeah I'm just a bit tired, I'm fine. But I actually felt like a train had hit me and maybe carried off some of my internal organs into the bargain. All day I could barely concentrate as all my energy and focus was taken up trying to stop myself from crumpling into a heap under my desk and passing out. I will not give in I will not give in! But at 3.30 pm I gave in and went home early and have spent the last two hours passed out in bed in that hideous drugged feeling of sleep you get. All the while absolutely furious at myself.
I've had Type 1 for nearly 11 years now - you'd think I'd be used to it and organised by now. And you'd think I'd recognise when a hypo wipeout has happened and that there's no use fighting it. But I still refuse to accept that I'm not like everyone else and believe that mind can triumph over matter, be it symptoms, faulty BG monitors, the tide ... Because if I accept this, I will have let it win. It will be an admission that I am WEAK.
Something is wrong with this picture, no?
Where's the doh smilie when you need it :lol:
I was given a touch screen meter but discarded it after a couple of days as it kept popping off to other screens. I'm very happy with my Contour meter and have just got a Contour X as a spare. I write all my readings down in a notebook. I can see them at a glance. It would take me ages to find anything on a computer !!