What can a partner do to help?

[Pegasus25]

I've scared myself reading this forum. My husband is definitely in denial about his diabetes and I don't want him to die. We just had a little boy together who is 2 months old now.

He eats and drinks what he likes and just balances it out with insulin. He also has coeliac disease. The problem is the nice gluten free stuff is packed full of sugar. Poor guy can't have anything nice really!

Some of you may have seen my other thread about his little brother just being diagnosed with T1 diabetes too. All 4 of us live together so I'd really like to know what I can do to help them both control it. I think this is an opportunity for him to get on top of his own diabetes and helping his brother at the same time. I'd hate for hi brother to get into the same habits as him.

He also has auto immune liver disease, so he doesn't drink at all which is something I guess.

Is there a down to earth book out there that might be good for him to read? Something with a bit of humour might make it more inviting, maybe?

He rarely tests his blood glucose so I was thinking I'd just take charge of the kit and test them both when necessary, but I'm afraid I don't know when they are supposed to test, what it should be...

I know it will seem like I'm treating him like a child, but I don't care how it will look, I just want him around to see our baby grow up, and the fact is he doesn't take care of himself and me being naive about the disease doesn't help!

 

[Pegasus25]

Sorry for the essay!

Just to add, he's 24 and was diagnosed when he was 3. He uses humalog before/after meals and lantus every evening. Not sure if that makes a difference to any possible advice.

Thank you

 

[SophiaW]

I don't know your husband but my concern would be that you need to offer support rather than taking control otherwise he may resent your good intentions and rebel against his diabetes. I think you need to talk to him and explain your concerns that he keeps good health as you have a child now and also to offer support and act as a good role model for his younger brother. There is a book called Type 1 Diabetes in Children, Adoslescents and Young Adults (amazon have them) and that offers some very good reading if you and your husband want to understand and get better control of diabetes. As a parent of a child with diabetes I found the book to be very valuable reading and it was well worth the money, it scares me to think where we'd be now if I hadn't read the book and gained the knowledge I have from it. I don't know very much about coeliac but there must be meals your husband can eat that don't contain gluten and for those foods that you want that traditionally contain gluten perhaps you can make your own using gluten-free flour, as you're making it yourself maybe you can include less sugar.

 

[IanD]

Pegasus - has he any diabetes symptoms that concern you (& him)? I would hope that as a T1 & now a daddy, he would be concerned. Obviously it takes commitment to take control. Presumably he does control his diet as a coeliac.

I'm elderly & T2 so my comments should be read with that understanding. I control my diab with a low carb diet - now 4 years with no indication of any problems, & diabetes complications reversed.

My diet is basically gluten free, as I have cut out wheat products & other carbs from my diet. I eat plenty of proteins & veg, & make a very versatile cake-bread using ground almonds as a base.

My two main recipes are:
For almond cakes:
Very approx - I never make the same mix twice - it's very versatile
50 g ground almonds
50 g coconut powder
50 g soya flour
25 g milled flax seeds
1 1/2 teasp baking powder
1 teasp cinnamon
4 eggs
80 ml olive oil

Sift dry ingredients into a bowl & add the unsifted bits. Add oil & eggs & whisk thoroughly.
Should be a soft dropping consistence – add another egg, or water or milk if necessary.
Spoon into 12 baking cases & bake at 175 deg C (gas mark 5) for about 17 minutes.
Cool on a wire rack. Store in an air-tight container, preferably in the fridge. Use within 3 days.
Slice & spread with cholesterol reducing margarine; use with the main meal instead of potato or rice to absorb gravy, etc.
I eat about 4 a day.

Variations:
Add sweetener, sultanas, cocoa powder ....

Almond porridge:
3 dessert sp ground almonds
2 dsp coconut powder
1 dsp milled flax seeds
Mix with milk (I use soya) to a smooth paste to eat cold;
or with more milk & m-wave to eat hot.

Hope that helps. The carb content of both recipes is very low, so he will need to test BG & control his insulin.

You will have to beware of nut/soya allergy with the baby.

I will try to find a link to a low-carbing T1 who introduced me to low carb.