On the whole, it's probably safest to enjoy the first date at a neutral location like a restaurant, until you get to know each other a little better. If there's no romantic spark, what does it matter? You can still enjoy an evening of good food and convivial conversation.
Safest maybe, but also boring, and I often find it quite hard to have a conversation over dinner or drinks, being stuck in a chair and having to conversate while being mildly uncomfortable.
Our plan got a bit confusing, and I was painfully confronted with diabetes for a bit yesterday. I asked him at what time he'd like to meet, before or after dinner, and he proposed meeting at around 4:30, have a drink, and then he'll cook us something.
Perfect plan except for diabetes...
So far, we'd been exchanging short and witty messages, showing a happiness to meet without worries or overplanning. And now I had to decide if I wanted to keep this up and accept his offer, which would likely mean hours of annoyingly having to deal with diabetes and corrections or hypos, alarms, or if I wanted to let him know up front he's dating someone with a chronic condition requiring odd food choices and injecting medication.
Not an easy choice with our chat so far being very casual. (It started with me sending him a message in reaction to his profile info saying something like: "Beer in the pub - like; walking the dog - like; car trip to the south - only if it's not too hot, want to go have a beer together?" and he replied with: "Sure, when and where?")
I chose breaking style and explaining I'd love to, but I prefer to eat lowish carb with a short explanation on the main carbs and insulin dosing being difficult, but not impossible. The next couple of hours were quite stressed, waiting for a response, and when it came he proposed meeting after dinner.
This made me quite sad, not sure if he wanted to make things easier for me or if he was having second thoughts about dating a diabetic. I don't think I've ever felt this diabetic before.
He would have known anyway very shortly after meeting when I'd take out my insulin pen before the first beer, but that's different from making things complicated beforehand.
I replied that I'd much prefer to eat at his place, no matter what he cooked, and that I can dose for high carb meals but it just takes more work. And spent another few hours stressing about his reply.
Turned out I was worried over nothing!
His next idea was to do the shopping and cooking together, he was very interested in keto because he wants to lose a bit of weight, and he prefers vegetarian but does eat beef and fish.
Sounds like a very fun date to me!