"What have you eaten" Parallel Chat

[Antje77]

he would have preferred to have a wicker coffin (only one model available made of pine with fake brass handles). "Oh" she said, Wouldn't that bit awfully draughty?"

Well, she's not wrong!
But once buried that problem is solved so it's just for a short while.

 

[Annb]

He always did like being out in the fresh air. We buried him not 100 yards from the sea, with a good view of it. As an old sailor, that seemed appropriate. Em was remembering that recently when she said to me "we buried him where he could see the sea." Em's elder siblings were squeamish and didn't want to go near the coffin but Em wanted to see him and give him a picture of a dragon she had drawn for him. We let her put it in the coffin herself and she laid it gently on his chest and said "Goodbye Grandad." She was just 9 days after her 6th birthday.

 

[Antje77]

He always did like being out in the fresh air. We buried him not 100 yards from the sea, with a good view of it. As an old sailor, that seemed appropriate. Em was remembering that recently when she said to me "we buried him where he could see the sea." Em's elder siblings were squeamish and didn't want to go near the coffin but Em wanted to see him and give him a picture of a dragon she had drawn for him. We let her put it in the coffin herself and she laid it gently on his chest and said "Goodbye Grandad." She was just 9 days after her 6th birthday.

This sounds like a place where I'd love to be buried once my time comes!
I'd also very much like to have a picture of a dragon put on my chest when I go. Dying is a pretty scary thing, and a dragon might be perfect for some extra courage.

On the different approaches from different grandchildren, again, it's all about being able to make choices. Wanting or not wanting to see a deceased loved one are both perfectly fine choices, no matter your age. Like your grandchildren have shown, 6 is not too young to make an informed choice fitting your personality, and there are 80 year olds feeling strongly either way.

I once had a good friend tell me he absolutely didn't want anyone to see him after he died because he felt seeing a dead person was horrible. I tried to explain it's not about the deceased but about the living but he was adamant. We mostly lost touch in years following, despite still being good friends.
When he suddenly died I chose not to tell his close relatives about his wish. I'm glad I got to say goodbye in person.

With my father, the coffin was open in my barn where we gathered before going to the crematorium with lunch sandwiches and stuff, and I made sure everyone knew so they wouldn't suddenly be confronted with something they rather wouldn't see. A couple of people stayed out of the barn until we closed the coffin, most were happy to have a sandwich and coffee or a beer right there. I had prepared plates of childrens paint so people could leave a goodbye wave handprint on the outside of the coffin, and it were the children (children of my cousins mostly) who decided those goodbyes should be on the inside of the coffin as well, which I found the sweetest thing.
The smallest children made a large brown blob on one side of the coffin as happens whean you smear all colours of paint, and everyone involved with carrying the coffin at one point or other got their clothes smeared with paint, good thing there are very few in my family with any sense of fashion.

 

[Annb]

The send-off you gave your father sounds wonderful. I'm sure he would have appreciated it. Em has always been very matter-of-fact about the facts that living involve although none of her siblings are the same - she must get it from her phlegmatic father - the others have different fathers. Some think she's an oddball and weird. To my mind she's well balanced and sensible.

 

[MrsA2]

So now we are nearly at the end of a long grey January, what have we all got in our diaries to look forward to?

 

[Annb]

So now we are nearly at the end of a long grey January, what have we all got in our diaries to look forward to?

3 family birthdays in February. DIL and her 2 sons from first and second marriages. Alistair is husband number 3 - he seems to be a keeper, thank goodness.

 

[MrsA2]

2 February birthdays, but don't think we'll be meeting up this time around.

We've got holiday trips booked for Easter and May and December! Just all seem so far away currently

 

[Annb]

3 family birthdays in February. DIL and her 2 sons from first and second marriages. Alistair is husband number 3 - he seems to be a keeper, thank goodness.

Got that wrong - not the keeper bit. Eldest son's birthday was 25th January, not 7th February, as i had thought. 25th January was my SIL's birthday but didn't realise that it was Jo's as well. I thought he shared his birthday with my aunt, not my SIL. Better late than never. 2nd son's birthday is 1st February - cards and presents in the post. DIL's is 2nd February. Alistair will take that home on the 2nd for me.

 

[AndBreathe]

Jessj - VERY Off topic, so I’ll send myself out on a long, healthy walk shortly (it’s 08:00 here, so not insane after all) as penance, and,post here, rather than the main thread, but if you have an accurate prescription, and frames you like and are appropriate, you could consider Reglaze Glasses Direct.

long story, but I have terrible trouble finding suitable (without cartoon characters on the arms) frames for my own petite frame, so this year, after a change in prescription, coupled with an inability to find new frames, I elected to use the above and give them a go. I had varifocals, reactions lenses and a few other bits, including new nose pads for a few pounds over £100. Im delighted with my new lenses. To be fair, my prescription isn’t complex.

if you register, they send a 10% off voucher almost immediately (and regularly thereafter) too. They are very responsive on their messaging system, and give a 100% money back guarantee.

I could be middle ground to your challenges.

 

[Antje77]

Jessj - VERY Off topic, so I’ll send myself out on a long, healthy walk shortly (it’s 08:00 here, so not insane after all) as penance, and,post here

I'm not sure @jessj has this thread on watch so I tagged her to make sure.

 

[jessj]

Thank you very much, @Antje77 , you're right, I do forget this thread. Now everyone has late various 'likes'. Loved you stories, they were a wonderful read & so good that you can have a send off like that there.

@AndBreathe, also, many, many thanks for that info, I shall look into & get ready for when appointments & interventions have finished. It really is handy to know as it can be & is too expensive. Cheers m'dear!

 

[Antje77]

Thank you very much, @Antje77 , you're right, I do forget this thread. Now everyone has late various 'likes'.

Haha, yes, I turned my head away from the forum to cook and eat for maybe 30 minutes and all of a sudden I had like 13 alerts!

Loved you stories, they were a wonderful read & so good that you can have a send off like that there.

Thank you!
And I'm sorry the possibility isn't there in your country for the people who'd prefer it.
Your likes made me reread, and I realised that from those posts, a month ago, things have been on the way up again, mentally. Which would have happened anyway, but writing about those very important things in my life may have speeded up the process. Those hidden little nooks in the forum can be really useful sometimes!

I hope you'll find a not too expensive solution for your glasses!
I'm blessed with eyes only needing reading glasses and doing well on the cheapest 99 cents ones. Just a couple of days ago I was complaining to a friend that I'd had to invest a whole 6 euros for new glasses because the old ones (next to the couch, car, bathroom, kitchen, bed, and bag) weren't strong enough anymore.
I'll immediately stop complaining, feeling quite embarassed now.

 

[jessj]

Sorry about that, @Antje77 & to the others too!

It would be good to have the choice in how we end our days, it pops up in the media here every now & then, but it needs more than that. The only way a Brit can do anything is to travel to Dignitas in Switzerland, just crazy that we can do it for our beloved pets that don't have a voice, but not our beloved family that do & can choose. You are very lucky to have that humane choice.

I'm pleased for you that writing all that down probably helped your mood to go up maybe a bit quicker, it is supposed to be helpful & healthy, so good for you.

As for the glasses situation, thank you, but don't be embarrassed, enjoy the fact that you can use the wonderful cheapies to help. I did up to about 4 years ago. Like you, gradually buying up a spec, but coo inflation as 6€ is a bit steep though from 99c!

 

[jessj]

While I'm here, has @Jennifer55 gone walkabout again?
Jen...‍<waves>

 

[Antje77]

While I'm here, has @Jennifer55 gone walkabout again?
Jen...‍<waves>

Did you mean @JenniferM55 ?

Like you, gradually buying up a spec, but coo inflation as 6€ is a bit steep though from 99c!

Ah, no inflation, at 99 cents a piece it's almost 6 euros to replace the glasses in the 6 spots I need them.
Don't feel too sorry for my depth investment, the day before yesterday I bought 3 for 1,99, at 35% off. Which make me think, should I check the use by date? Those 35% stickers are usually reserved for products about to go off (and cheeses about to be at their best).

 

[AndBreathe]

Thank you very much, @Antje77 , you're right, I do forget this thread. Now everyone has late various 'likes'. Loved you stories, they were a wonderful read & so good that you can have a send off like that there.

@AndBreathe, also, many, many thanks for that info, I shall look into & get ready for when appointments & interventions have finished. It really is handy to know as it can be & is too expensive. Cheers m'dear!

No worries.

I felt it a great find, for my own VERY different frustrations. It’s a bonus that they are very nearby to us, but with the tracked services they use, the whole process takes about a week.

They also do a frame refurb service, which could be interesting, although eventually I just become bored of frames.

Hey ho. I hope your eyes settle soon.

 

[jessj]

Did you mean @JenniferM55 ?

Ah, no inflation, at 99 cents a piece it's almost 6 euros to replace the glasses in the 6 spots I need them.
Don't feel too sorry for my depth investment, the day before yesterday I bought 3 for 1,99, at 35% off. Which make me think, should I check the use by date? Those 35% stickers are usually reserved for products about to go off (and cheeses about to be at their best).

Doh...yes, I did! That happened when I tagged you the other day, @Antje77, I noticed that time though as it came up as all capitals without the 77. Ah, got ya and, nah, doubt it!

Thank you for the added info & hope, @AndBreathe.

 

[Antje77]

Doh...yes, I did! That happened when I tagged you the other day, @Antje77, I noticed that time though as it came up as all capitals without the 77.

Oh yes, this ghostly @ANTJE has been tagged so often, and has also accidentally been included in numerous PMs.
She joined years ago, and never came back after joining. But should she ever log in again she'll be quite shocked with all the unread alerts she has!

Thankfully, a couple of years ago Admin changed some settings on that account so it's not as easy to tag her anymore, but it's still possible.

 

[jessj]

Talking about raclette on the other thread, it made me think of the first time I had it. In the 90s we moved to Northern Brittany. A small hamlet with very few houses. We found that we had the most wonderful Breton neighbours, that accepted some foreigners that spoke awful French, very happily. The first meal we ever had with them was a raclette, never heard of it before that & no net to look it up.

We were invited round for aperos at 7pm. When we arrived, there was already a huge saucepan bubbling away on the stove. Anyway, we sat merrily drinking rather a lot of aperos, speaking Frenglish & having a good laugh, turned out our French got better after a few aperos! Then it was time for dinner, it was past 10pm. The saucepan was finally turned off & it turned out to be a pot full of homegrown, unpeeled, small potatoes & cauliflower. It was all rather brown but the dirt was sterilised & I don't know how M-C even drained it, it was all so er...well cooked! The raclette was explained & demonstrated, then we helped ourselves to the charcuterie, some potatoes & the cauli. It was all thoroughly enjoyable but the dirty brown cauli that actually sighed & collapsed under the melted cheese was divine! Not had it that way since, but it really was & still is the best cauli I've ever had.

 

[Antje77]

Anyway, we sat merrily drinking rather a lot of aperos, speaking Frenglish & having a good laugh, turned out our French got better after a few aperos!

I once read a study on this phenomenon. Apparently, it's actually true, people are better at speaking a second language they aren't fluent in after a few drinks!
The trick is in the dosing of course. Shortly after being at your best at speaking a foreign language, it goes downhill fast.

Your meal and neighbours sound wonderful!