Feeling so alone!

[livitridge]

Some of you have probably seen a few of my posts before, about my recent struggling to manage my sugars, and fear or hypos.
I don't think I have accepted I'm diabetic yet (despite having it for 8 years) I always pushed it away and neglected it. None of my friends ever understood or even cared much about my diabetes so clearly it had a negative effect on me. Anyway, more to the point, I don't know anyone who has type 1 diabetes. I find that talking to people who don't have it can never fully understand me and it frustrates me that I have no one talk to that gets me. I suffer with major anxiety and mild depression (although it's been worse these past weeks) I just need someone to chat to about things sometimes. Running out of ideas on how to help myself!!!

 

[elaine77]

Hi liv,

I'm sorry you feel so low but I can tell you for sure that ur not the only one so ur not alone. I have only been diagnosed for 2 years and only went onto insulin in October and I'm pretty much the same as you, I know nobody at all with type 1 diabetes.

My friends didn't understand or care at all either - cue a major breakdown from me after a trip to Burger King on the way back from a hen weekend in Wakefield!

There are people on here who will be able to give u so much more advice than me as they have coped with this illness for far longer but I can tell u a couple of things that I have learned recently and those are:

Diabetes is bad but it could be worse - it could be soooo much worse.

It's here for life and it's not going away and we need to control IT rather than have IT control us - it's a part of our life, it's not our whole life.

You can scream, shout, kick, cry...and then you still have to go and give urself an insulin jab because u have to if u want to stay alive so the anger and the energy spent being angry about it will have been for nothing... So it's best to try and accept it the best way u can and save ur energy for something more worthy..

My sister has also recently been diagnosed with Ceoliac disease and so she has many of the same struggles as we do when it comes to how she fits food into her life... We're not alone and I hope that gives you at least a little comfort

 

[livitridge]

Thank you I really appreciate it , I am trying so hard to accept it and have for 8 years now. It never used to bother me before but it is now.
A major part of it is psychological too, I find myself waiting to have a hypo rather than having one. If I give myself insulin, I can't resist waiting 2 hours to test later and find myself checking every 15-20 minutes through out the day, predicting what I think my blood should be and panicking when it's not what I think it should be. Or when I eat something high in carb but forget to bolas, check and see that it had not raised my blood sugars if that makes sense? It baffles me. Feel like I'm in a mental prison lol.

 

[Juicyj]

Some of you have probably seen a few of my posts before, about my recent struggling to manage my sugars, and fear or hypos.
I don't think I have accepted I'm diabetic yet (despite having it for 8 years) I always pushed it away and neglected it. None of my friends ever understood or even cared much about my diabetes so clearly it had a negative effect on me. Anyway, more to the point, I don't know anyone who has type 1 diabetes. I find that talking to people who don't have it can never fully understand me and it frustrates me that I have no one talk to that gets me. I suffer with major anxiety and mild depression (although it's been worse these past weeks) I just need someone to chat to about things sometimes. Running out of ideas on how to help myself!!!

Hi yes it's pretty over whelming at times, and can feel like an enormous struggle, coming on here and blowing off steam will help and you certainly aren't alone.

Have you thought about trying meditation ? At a time when I was struggling I did some classes and felt a lot better, it seemed to ease my mind and lift me, it can give you coping methods for handling your anxieties. Another quick simple exercise is to just take a 20 minute walk in the country or a park, fresh air and deep breathing will also help.

Sadly diabetes dosent go away but finding coping strategies to handle it will make you feel better, try not to neglect it as running high will also affect your mood, being more positive and coping better will help you feel better, let me know how you get on and try not to be so hard on yourself

 

[Juicyj]

Thank you I really appreciate it , I am trying so hard to accept it and have for 8 years now. It never used to bother me before but it is now.
A major part of it is psychological too, I find myself waiting to have a hypo rather than having one. If I give myself insulin, I can't resist waiting 2 hours to test later and find myself checking every 15-20 minutes through out the day, predicting what I think my blood should be and panicking when it's not what I think it should be. Or when I eat something high in carb but forget to bolas, check and see that it had not raised my blood sugars if that makes sense? It baffles me. Feel like I'm in a mental prison lol.

Just read your last reply, I think part of your anxiety is your constant testing, I was like this until I did DAFNE, then I tested only before mealtimes and when driving, it helped me to relax more, otherwise you are thinking about it constantly when you could get on with living,, have you done DAFNE yet ?

 

[noblehead]

You will always have someone to talk to as long as your a member of this forum, but if you want to meet other people with type 1 in person then ask to go on a DAFNE course, you'll get to meet other people dealing with the same issues as yourself and the course will also help you manage your condition better, just ask your DSN to put your name down (assuming you've not done the course already).

 

[noblehead]

Just read your last reply, I think part of your anxiety is your constant testing, I was like this until I did DAFNE, then I tested only before mealtimes and when driving, it helped me to relax more, otherwise you are thinking about it constantly when you could get on with living,, have you done DAFNE yet ?

We posted at the same time

 

[Juicyj]

We posted at the same time

Good timing !

 

[MagicFirefly]

Hi Liv,

Firstly, I have a friend who's had diabetes for over 20years and still hasn't accepted it. (she's also now paying for it with complications which include her eyesight and is STILL in denial)

It's been over 21years since I was diagnosed. It still frustrates me at times and gets me down. Especially now I'm finding that despite not having any noticeable complications, I am suffering with other things we are more susceptible to because of type 1 diabetes.

It's a super complicated condition. Everything seems to effect it - from the change in the weather to the types of food you eat. Every day is different, even if you do the same thing, eat the same thing etc. Every person with diabetes is different. (which is a ****** from the carer / professional point of view)

I'm not sure where about's in the UK you are, but I'd be more than happy to keep in touch and support each other. I know what you mean about other people not understanding. I find a lot of my friends either panic or don't seem to grasp the serious of the situation because they see that I don't make a huge fuss over it.

Keep going. Keep posting.

 

[ChrisMaleType1]

Hi Liv, it's great that you're talking about it here there's also other forums. The diabetes.daily site though American is a good one. A dafne course is a good starting place. You could go to an diabetes uk event, call a peer, or join a local support group - all here http://diabetes.org.uk/How_we_help. I always like to meet other diabetics but I live in London.
I've had diabetes for a similar period to you but I got it later in life. I've learnt that diabetes isn't always predictable. It depends on mood, activity levels and many other things. I always remind myself that great medical advances aren't far off on the horizon and we live in a well-off country.

 

[livitridge]

I don't know what I would do without this forum now lol, I've read a lot of posts relating to my situation here.
It isn't really the Hypo itself that gets me, because I'm used to them and have had so many over the years, it's just a part of diabetes. But there has always been a reason for having one. It's when they are all unexplained, even when I'm taking half the amount of insulin I should be to prevent it, it has still dropped more than it should do. It's the constant worrying day in day out, if I test and my BS is on the high side it sort of brings me some relief, and it should be high because I ate without bolasing, but it will bring its self down later? My basal is not too high, I have adjusted it to half the amount I was taking before when things were going fine. Just so stuck!!!!

 

[Beckie2014]

Bless you darling you have come to the right place and I'm sure we have all felt the same way! Always here if you need a chat xxx

 

[himtoo]

Something that has not been mentioned in this topic but may be relevant to you @livitridge is the honeymoon period.
as you are still young but have had D for 8 years your body could be producing some of its own insulin which can make it more difficult to always give the right dose.
I find it reassuring that there are so many great people on here as it helps me a lot to share my feelings and experiences.
Keep your chin up young lady !!!

 

[Spencer67]

JuicyJ is on it, i agree with her to bring down 'major anxiety' meditation is very helpful. There are some great youtube videos that help with anxiety and understanding its causes, sometimes it may be a change in the thinking process that may be required and cognitive behavior therapy can be helpful, practicing 'mindfulness' is very helpful to me. There are a lot of tools out there to help with depression and anxiety its just finding the right ones that suit you and that takes work and if you want a good balance in your life you have to consider the whole picture not just the banality of injecting because this is just a small part of the problems T1D face, we really are made up of mind, body and spirit. Diabetes messes with the endocrine system big time, understand this and you can understand your anxiety better. It really is a daily battle some find it easier than others but that is because we are all different. Your right though it is a lonesome path and diabetes makes a lot of us feel isolated, I hope you can get yourself into a better place soon. gl.

 

[catherinecherub]

Some of you have probably seen a few of my posts before, about my recent struggling to manage my sugars, and fear or hypos.
I don't think I have accepted I'm diabetic yet (despite having it for 8 years) I always pushed it away and neglected it. None of my friends ever understood or even cared much about my diabetes so clearly it had a negative effect on me. Anyway, more to the point, I don't know anyone who has type 1 diabetes. I find that talking to people who don't have it can never fully understand me and it frustrates me that I have no one talk to that gets me. I suffer with major anxiety and mild depression (although it's been worse these past weeks) I just need someone to chat to about things sometimes. Running out of ideas on how to help myself!!!

Hi,

Can I ask what you were like before you had diabetes? Were you anxious and prone to depression then or did you sail through life without a care in the world?
A reaction to a diagnosis is real and upsets a lot of people, a normal reaction to an abnormal situation is how it could be described.

This article deals with emotion issues.

http://www.diabetesexplained.com/diabetic-emotional-issues.html

 

[weeezer]

Hey how you feeling today? Must admit I've been 'too sweet' () for 15 years and was 'ok' with it til quite recently. It's like I just realised its never going to go away, or get easier, and will always need close monitoring (if those complications are to be avoided) prone to anxiety etc, mostly about health etc. You are certainly not alone! X

 

[carlos fandango]

Only just came across this thread...

I cannot agree enough with those people who had recommended a DAFNE course. Going on one was a major turning point in my life, as it made me feel so much less anxious about my condition. Obviously it's nice to meet other people with Type 1 diabetes, and that's a big benefit of going on the course. However, the bigger benefit (for me) was just hearing the 'professionals' (doctors, nurses, care team) all speak with one voice in saying that it's OK to have unexpected highs and lows, that it was completely normal, that I should not give myself a hard time for having them, and then giving me practical tools and tips on how to manage those unexpected results.

I'm sure that meditation / mindfulness etc are great and I know they work very well for some people, but personally I became less stressed because of all the practical stuff and the reassurances i got from the DAFNE course.

 

[LaineyK]

Don't be alone..I too feel I'm on a low at the moment with it.. I keep reading bad things about type 1 and it does scare me. A lot of them on the news section of this forum..I have a little 6 yr old boy who is beautiful inside and out, and I really want to be around for him and not become ill further down the line, crying as I'm typing..so, hugs to you and everyone who's feeling a bit helpless at the moment Together we will control this thing and not let it control us.

 

[moz1]

Think it would be good to get on DAFNE course as it will rebuild your confidence and help put you back in control. Also you get to chat to other t1's and the DSN etc who can give some great advice. Things will get better x

 

[kevinfitzgerald]

Some of you have probably seen a few of my posts before, about my recent struggling to manage my sugars, and fear or hypos.
I don't think I have accepted I'm diabetic yet (despite having it for 8 years) I always pushed it away and neglected it. None of my friends ever understood or even cared much about my diabetes so clearly it had a negative effect on me. Anyway, more to the point, I don't know anyone who has type 1 diabetes. I find that talking to people who don't have it can never fully understand me and it frustrates me that I have no one talk to that gets me. I suffer with major anxiety and mild depression (although it's been worse these past weeks) I just need someone to chat to about things sometimes. Running out of ideas on how to help myself!!!

Hi there,

I have been Type 1 for 33 years and also suffer with an underlying anxiety disorder that I have had most of my life which I take medication for.

Diabetes is an illness you can live with. Respect it and it will repect you. I try to think that all I need to do is eat a healthy diet, take my insulin when needed and go out and live my life. I fully understand your depression as I can personally relate but you will feel more in control of any other physical and mental issues if your diabetes is under control.

Try not to obsess over it. I don't and things could be oh so much worse than they are.

Speak to your Diabetes Specialist Nurse. All the ones I have had over the years have been fabulous.

Stick at it ok, you are not alone and that's a fact!