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Dread my yearly diabetes appt

H

Hels9797

Member
Messages
6
Type of diabetes
Type 2
Treatment type
Tablets (oral)
Hi All,
New to the forum but been battling type 2 diabetes since being diagnosed in covid. I had premature menopause at 15, my weight ballooned despite doing lots of exercise, played football to a good level. I eat reasonably well, all food is home cooked, minimise pasta, rice, if i have it its brown or wholewheat. My diabetic nurse is very judging and critical and i see the same one every year. Last year she disputed everything i said or i did and critiqued or argued it by judging me just by my weight. I ended up really down, in tears leaving feeling i was all to blame for way i have ended up. The self criticism and punishment/blame is the worst. I sit around 52/53 blood sugar level. I try and get it down further but dont find it easy. Does anyone else dread their appt like me?

Thanks
Helen
 
Hi Helen,
A big hug for you, nobody has the right to judge you, especially someone who sees you once a year!
I would give anything for my A1c to be 53! It sounds like you are doing great and it must be such a battle going into menopause at such a young age.
I am also new to this forum and have found excellent advice and tips to help and everyone is really supportive.
I know it’s hard but try not to dread it, if your bloods come back roughly the same then you know you are doing something right and perhaps a few tweaks from advice on this forum might just bring you down a few points.
I’ve just started focussing on low carb diet, I’m menopausal and nothing else seems to make a difference to my weight. There is lots of help if that’s something you might think of trying.
Good luck and keep your chin up xx
 
FreidaMercury said:
Hi Helen,
A big hug for you, nobody has the right to judge you, especially someone who sees you once a year!
I would give anything for my A1c to be 53! It sounds like you are doing great and it must be such a battle going into menopause at such a young age.
I am also new to this forum and have found excellent advice and tips to help and everyone is really supportive.
I know it’s hard but try not to dread it, if your bloods come back roughly the same then you know you are doing something right and perhaps a few tweaks from advice on this forum might just bring you down a few points.
I’ve just started focussing on low carb diet, I’m menopausal and nothing else seems to make a difference to my weight. There is lots of help if that’s something you might think of trying.
Good luck and keep your chin up xx
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Thank you, just wish i had a supportive nurse rather than someone who thinks you aren't making an effort.
 
Yes, I dread mine as well. Some nurses are great, but I've got one who constantly threatens me with insulin whilst knowing I am needle phobic, and I know my recent results aren't great, but she is quite scathing about what I do and what I eat. I'm autistic and have major food issues, which don't help me find safe foods to eat. but there's zero empathy with that, just 'If you don't do better then it's insulin!'... and I'm quite fed up with it all.
 
All the times I have seen diabetic Nurses (from years ago) I must have been very lucky I have never had a nasty one yet
and that includes 2 differen counties I have lived
Also I am lucky now in that my surgery has 2 DN's but neither do more than 4 days a week. I a very sorry to hear you have a nasty one
 
Mark Rawlinson said:
All the times I have seen diabetic Nurses (from years ago) I must have been very lucky I have never had a nasty one yet
and that includes 2 differen counties I have lived
Also I am lucky now in that my surgery has 2 DN's but neither do more than 4 days a week. I a very sorry to hear you have a nasty one
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They just judge instantly before understanding your history like we have all caused this to ourselves. Not convinced thats always the case. She always wants to throw different drugs at me too which never sure of. Not sure on rights to refuse to see her. I just come out incredibly stressed every time and dread the appointment
 
Patrick66 said:
Yes, I dread mine as well. Some nurses are great, but I've got one who constantly threatens me with insulin whilst knowing I am needle phobic, and I know my recent results aren't great, but she is quite scathing about what I do and what I eat. I'm autistic and have major food issues, which don't help me find safe foods to eat. but there's zero empathy with that, just 'If you don't do better then it's insulin!'... and I'm quite fed up with it all.
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I feel your pain. This particular one just judges me instantly before understanding my history. Not a caring personality or supportive in anyway and doesn't believe a word i say. Argues back. I would like to try another but shes the only one associated to my GP i think. Such a stressful experience
 
Hels9797 said:
Sounds lie your NurseThey just judge instantly before understanding your history like we have all caused this to ourselves. Not convinced thats always the case. She always wants to throw different drugs at me too which never sure of. Not sure on rights to refuse to see her. I just come out incredibly stressed every time and dread the appointment
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Sounds like your nurse is old school, both that I see do noy have this attitude they have said it woulf have happened anyway as it is a progressive condition/disease they do say it might not have been as high (origianally) but it would have happened anyway
 
Mark Rawlinson said:
Sounds like your nurse is old school, both that I see do noy have this attitude they have said it woulf have happened anyway as it is a progressive condition/disease they do say it might not have been as high (origianally) but it would have happened anyway
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Yeah shes actually quite young so not like shes experienced and been in profession a long time and perhaps fatigued.
 
You won't be judged here. We know that this illness is just the luck of the draw - we don't cause it but we can manage it. I'm sorry your nurse is so unsupportive. Do you have a good friend with whom you can rehearse the likely conversation, so you can work on how to give some replies that make you feel better?
 
Outlier said:
You won't be judged here. We know that this illness is just the luck of the draw - we don't cause it but we can manage it. I'm sorry your nurse is so unsupportive. Do you have a good friend with whom you can rehearse the likely conversation, so you can work on how to give some replies that make you feel better?
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Good idea Yep i can try that or maybe take someone with me to the appointment
 
Hels9797 said:
Not sure on rights to refuse to see her
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Sorry you have had such a bad experience with your nurse, you definitely have rights not to see her. Does your surgery have a pharmacist? Mine does and I have had my last couple of reviews with him. With that in mind, to help your diabetes and weight have you considered Ozempic or Mounjaro?
 
I've been lucky with most of my DNs and am also lucky(?) that practitioners seem less likely to "blame" T1s than T2s when discussing diabetes. But I have certainly dreaded some of my appointments in the past and can honestly say I would have been delighted to maintain an hba1c of 52/53 over the (many) years.

Victim blaming is just wrong. Please don't let your DN's deficiencies make you feel bad about yourself @Hels9797 . Their job is to help you, not make you feel bad about something you can't control.

Having said that, there are now new medications out there for T2s, and it might be worth your while to consider them. But if you went through the menopause at 15 I'd hope you have already seen some specialists about your metabolic issues, because I very much doubt that your DN has much experience with them.

Good luck with it all, please don't let one unfriendly DN make you feel bad about yourself. You deserve better treatment.
 
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