Pura Vida
Well-Known Member
These are wonderful !!
♦ I read that 4,153,237 people got married last year. Not to cause any
trouble, but shouldn't that be an even number?
♦ I find it ironic that the colors red, white, and blue stand for
freedom until they are flashing behind you.
♦ When wearing a bikini, women reveal 90% of their body. Men are so
polite they only look at the covered parts.
♦ Relationships are a lot like algebra. Have you ever looked at your X
and wondered Y?
♦ America is a country which produces citizens who will cross the
ocean to fight for democracy but won't cross the street to vote.
♦ You know that tingly little feeling you get when you love someone?
That's your common sense leaving your body.
♦ My therapist says I have a preoccupation with vengeance. We'll see
about that**!!
♦ I think my neighbor is stalking me as she's been Googling my name on
her computer. I saw it through my telescope last night.
♦ Money talks ... but all mine ever says is good-bye.
♦ You're not fat, you're just easier to see.
♦ If you think nobody cares whether you're alive, try missing a couple
of payments.
♦ I always wondered what the job application is like at Hooters. Do
they just give you a bra and say, "Here, fill this out?"
♦ I can’t understand why women are OK that JC Penny has an older
women’s clothing line named, "Sag Harbor."
♦ Denny’s has a slogan, "If it’s your birthday, the meal is on us." If
you’re in Denny’s and it’s your birthday, your life sucks!
♦ The location of your mailbox shows you how far away from your house
you can go in a robe before you start looking like a mental patient.
♦ I think it's pretty cool how Chinese people made a language entirely
out of tattoos.
♦ Money can’t buy happiness, but it keeps the kids in touch!
♦ The reason Mayberry was so peaceful and quiet was because nobody was
married. Andy, Aunt Bea, Barney, Floyd, Howard, Goober, Gomer, Sam,
Earnest T Bass, Helen, Thelma Lou, Clara and, of course, Opie were all
single. The only married person was Otis, and he stayed drunk.
Now, don’t you feel better knowing what an aphorism is?
---
♦ I read that 4,153,237 people got married last year. Not to cause any
trouble, but shouldn't that be an even number?
♦ I find it ironic that the colors red, white, and blue stand for
freedom until they are flashing behind you.
♦ When wearing a bikini, women reveal 90% of their body. Men are so
polite they only look at the covered parts.
♦ Relationships are a lot like algebra. Have you ever looked at your X
and wondered Y?
♦ America is a country which produces citizens who will cross the
ocean to fight for democracy but won't cross the street to vote.
♦ You know that tingly little feeling you get when you love someone?
That's your common sense leaving your body.
♦ My therapist says I have a preoccupation with vengeance. We'll see
about that**!!
♦ I think my neighbor is stalking me as she's been Googling my name on
her computer. I saw it through my telescope last night.
♦ Money talks ... but all mine ever says is good-bye.
♦ You're not fat, you're just easier to see.
♦ If you think nobody cares whether you're alive, try missing a couple
of payments.
♦ I always wondered what the job application is like at Hooters. Do
they just give you a bra and say, "Here, fill this out?"
♦ I can’t understand why women are OK that JC Penny has an older
women’s clothing line named, "Sag Harbor."
♦ Denny’s has a slogan, "If it’s your birthday, the meal is on us." If
you’re in Denny’s and it’s your birthday, your life sucks!
♦ The location of your mailbox shows you how far away from your house
you can go in a robe before you start looking like a mental patient.
♦ I think it's pretty cool how Chinese people made a language entirely
out of tattoos.
♦ Money can’t buy happiness, but it keeps the kids in touch!
♦ The reason Mayberry was so peaceful and quiet was because nobody was
married. Andy, Aunt Bea, Barney, Floyd, Howard, Goober, Gomer, Sam,
Earnest T Bass, Helen, Thelma Lou, Clara and, of course, Opie were all
single. The only married person was Otis, and he stayed drunk.
Now, don’t you feel better knowing what an aphorism is?
---
