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Diabetes VS Sexual Anxiety - please help.

E

E41

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This is my first post on here, I don't usually post on forums but I really hope there will be someone here who can give me some advice.

I am a type 1 diabetic and have been for about 10 years now, I am 24 years old and generally healthy, although my HBA1Cs have always been high, and on last reading were about 10. I'm actually in the process of getting my first blood test done for a year (been away etc) and don't think it will be much different.

I have always had a very healthy sex life, and never experienced any problems with performance. That is until I split up with my ex after a 3 year relationship last October. Even up until we split up I had no problems getting an erection, and rarely lost it once obtained. About 2 months later (about a week before Xmas) I was close to having a one-night stand with a girl I'd known for a little while and certainly fancied; it was very late, I'd had a long day, a few glasses of wine and a stodgy pizza, and my sugars were high (probs around 15 or so) and I just didn't work whatsoever. I'd never experienced anything like this before and of course it really shook me.

I went to see a GP the next week who said that this sort of thing happens to everyone and that because I'm still getting erections in my sleep its probably not a diabetic problem. I have been very anxious about the problem since, and it really hurt my self-confidence. This weekend past I had another opportunity with another girl, an old friend whom I've liked for a while and I know likes me back, but I was so nervous that I was unable to maintain a hard erection for any length of time, and was constantly worrying that despite our intimacy that very little was happening. I was able to get an erection long enough (although I'd question how hard) for her to (so sorry for crudeness!) use her hands. I do question though in the time between then and now, how often I get an erection thats not self stimulated.

Since the weekend I've been a nervous wreck, terrified that its the diabetes thats doing this, but I've also presented many symptoms of anxiety (shanking, butterflies, ringing in ears). I currently have many other worries, my job isn't great, I work long hours in a sector I'm struggling to get interested in, also I have a few financial worries, and social life has taken a pounding because all of my old university mates are all over the country and very rarely get to see them. So I can see there are lots of anxieties in my life that are probably contributing. The erections I do get, self stimulated or 'organic', never seem to stick around for long.

I saw a doctor last night and talked this all through, and am working much harder to improve my diabetes control, and suggested I have a few councilling sessions. I got a bit tense when he suggested using tablets (viagra) etc because surely as a 24 year old that's not necessary? I'm just very scared that lasting physical damage has been done, or if it's just my ridiculous overthinking mind thats making this happen.

I wanted to share my story because if there is anyone out there that can give me any advice or words of comfort I would really appreciate it. Is there anyone else my age thats going through something similar I would really value your help. Also do you think its more likely to be lasting damage from my diabetes or just my anxiety?
 
Dude, if you let your BG get up to 15 all sorts of bad things are going to happen. I'm not surprised you didn't manage to get an erection. Treat your diabetes with respect, and all sorts of other health problems will simply go away.
 
I'd imagine the combination of anxiety, drink and high blood glucose would be enough to effect anyone's sexual performance, counselling is a good step forward in dealing with your anxiety but you also need to work on lowering your bg too.

Good luck and hope all goes well!
 
Hello Mate,

Sorry to hear about your struggles, but "Borofergie" is 110% right, you really do need to respect the Diabetes, else it will NAIL you to the WALL.

I always try to think of diabetes in the following way, sugar / carbs get transported everywhere in our bodies via blood, without the movement of blood around our bodies nothing would get fixed / heal and we would die. BUT high sugar / carbs in our blood damages all parts of our bodies slowly. So why on earth would I want to run at high levels sugar / carbs in my blood, as all it will do for me is cause me issues and pain later on in my life.

As you are only 24 I am sure you will be back to your normal self if you get the sugar level under control, so may be you need to forget about sex for a short while and look to get your sugar under control and before you know it, who will be walking around and just happen to notice that all systems are working correctly etc.

Good luck.
 
E41 said:
T<snip>
I saw a doctor last night and talked this all through, and am working much harder to improve my diabetes control, and suggested I have a few councilling sessions. I got a bit tense when he suggested using tablets (viagra) etc because surely as a 24 year old that's not necessary? I'm just very scared that lasting physical damage has been done, or if it's just my ridiculous overthinking mind thats making this happen.
<snip>
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Listen to your doctor :)

You had a problem - happens to everyone at some time - and now you are in a major stew about it.
This isn't going to help you have relaxed and enjoyable sex.
The two things you were offered - counselling to try and reduce your anxiety and Viagra to help you over any temporary difficulties - are certainly worth a try.
It could be that once you have a good experience with the Viagra then your general outlook will improve a lot which in turn could mean that you don't need the pills.
Your age doesn't really count - try the solution before knocking it!
It sounds like your doctor is looking after you.

Whatever, as the others say you should make an effort to improve your BG control because this should also improve your general health and outlook.

Don't be shy about sharing your problems with your girlfriend - women are amazingly understanding and helpful, and if you share your anxieties then they may very well go away.

Cheers

LGC
 
Happens to a lot of men - diabetic or not! Ok, the sugars could have been a contributing factor, but it could have equally been something else! Know it's easier said than done, but try not to let it worry you. The more you worry the more likely it is to happen again.

The fact that you can still get an erection is encouraging. You probably just had a bad night. The fact that you were still worried about it the next weekend would not have helped.

Trust me, it happens and you are definitely not the first bloke to have experienced it! Try not to fret over it. In the meantime, try and keep your sugars under control and address any sources of stress in your life.

Em
 
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