How long did it take?

[Lynz84]

Hi guys.

I posted earlier in the week about having a bad time with diabetes. Essentially throwing my toys out of the pram (ooops!!). I had a good long chat with my counsellor and he has suggested i may not have actually accepted the diagnosis and im stressing myself out trying to do things that i need to take more thought to do (exercise for example). My question to you all is this-
How do you know youve accepted it and how long did it take?
Ive been diagnosed 6 years and felt i was doing ok but in hindsight i have maybe just been plodding along and trying to ignore the condition!

 

[himtoo]

hi there @Lynz84
when I was first diagnosed I was really fortunate to get a full program of education on all aspects of D.

this included learning about "the 5 stages of Grief" -- link here https://psychcentral.com/lib/the-5-stages-of-loss-and-grief/

in brief -- being diagnosed with a lifelong chronic disease is very much like losing a loved one - this was how it was explained to me.
so essentially -- we as long term lifers -- continually revisit these stages -- and learning how to get back to acceptance -- when the other 4 rear their heads is critical in terms of our well being.

( hope this makes sense )

 

[Struma]

hi there @Lynz84
when I was first diagnosed I was really fortunate to get a full program of education on all aspects of D.

this included learning about "the 5 stages of Grief" -- link here https://psychcentral.com/lib/the-5-stages-of-loss-and-grief/

in brief -- being diagnosed with a lifelong chronic disease is very much like losing a loved one - this was how it was explained to me.
so essentially -- we as long term lifers -- continually revisit these stages -- and learning how to get back to acceptance -- when the other 4 rear their heads is critical in terms of our well being.

( hope this makes sense )

Nice link @himtoo , thank you, I think many of us can benefit from it.

 

[EllsKBells]

It's been five years since diagnosis for me, and if I'm honest, I still haven't accepted it. It's something I'm working on with my psychologist.

However, I was watching the documentary 'Hospital' on BBC2 last night, and the doctor in question was talking to a patient with a brain tumour, but I think it actually applies to all of us. He said (I'm paraphrasing, my memory's not that good!) "We're prolonging your life for you to enjoy yourself, we're not treating you so you can spend all your time looking for more treatments". I think that's an important thing to remember when trying to do this acceptance thing, that we do all this to live, rather than survive, if that makes sense. I am not my diabetes. Easier some days than others.

 

[Juicyj]

Hi @Lynz84 I am 5 years in now but still have my moments - I am pretty sure if you ask any type 1 they will agree that they have their moments and I do literally refer to them as moments as they do pass, this is why being able to talk to other people in the same boat on this forum helps, try and evaluate how you feel, what made you feel this way, then accept the feeling and move on, living with a constant needy condition is going to impact in you mentally at some point so be mindful of this and talk about it, each day will be different. I have to admit I love @EllsKBells comment about the doctor, we have the tools so let's try and enjoy our lives the best we can, rather than striving for perfect numbers and becoming consumed with 'what ifs'.

 

[Scott-C]

Jeesh, @Lynz84 , you're throwing some seriously existential questions around here!

My take on getting to acceptance is:

Don't worry or think about your next a1c. Just apply a bit of common sense each day, the basic T1 rules you've learned, and the next a1c will work out ok as a result of that.

Don't obsess about carb-counting and writing everything down. It's a good starting point, but you'll get to a point where you can walk into any bar, restaurant, cafe on the planet, and just wing it a bit based on past experience and intuition. I'm not saying just guess, far from it, but being able to just make an educated judgment call on any meal you want gives a huge amount of freedom without feeling restricted. There's so many variables involved in our metabolisms that sometimes winging it a bit gets as good results as high teching it!

Accept that people around you will bend over backwards to help you if you hypo. People are kind.

I've been in this for 29 years. I'm always conscious that I'll need to pay attention to it every day, but I'm comfortable with that - I'm helping myself, and I know that others will help me if I'm not able to. I think I still had some resentment after 5 years, but it wears out.

 

[HasanG]

I think I am pretty lucky to have accepted it a couple months after diagnosis. I still have moments where I think about the magnitude of the disease.

 

[gavin86]

I've been diagnosed 2 months now... I feel like it hasn't been an issue, but I know how these things can hide beneath the surface. Time will tell I guess.

 

[Lynz84]

hi there @Lynz84
when I was first diagnosed I was really fortunate to get a full program of education on all aspects of D.

this included learning about "the 5 stages of Grief" -- link here https://psychcentral.com/lib/the-5-stages-of-loss-and-grief/

in brief -- being diagnosed with a lifelong chronic disease is very much like losing a loved one - this was how it was explained to me.
so essentially -- we as long term lifers -- continually revisit these stages -- and learning how to get back to acceptance -- when the other 4 rear their heads is critical in terms of our well being.

( hope this makes sense )

Hey himtoo!

Yes it makes perfect sense! I guess I havent necessarily been paying attention to how i feel as such (other than this is ****!) Ive just been focussed on a1c and blood sugar levels etc!

 

[Lynz84]

Hi @Lynz84 I am 5 years in now but still have my moments - I am pretty sure if you ask any type 1 they will agree that they have their moments and I do literally refer to them as moments as they do pass, this is why being able to talk to other people in the same boat on this forum helps, try and evaluate how you feel, what made you feel this way, then accept the feeling and move on, living with a constant needy condition is going to impact in you mentally at some point so be mindful of this and talk about it, each day will be different. I have to admit I love @EllsKBells comment about the doctor, we have the tools so let's try and enjoy our lives the best we can, rather than striving for perfect numbers and becoming consumed with 'what ifs'.

And I think thats my problem juicyj! I cannot stop focusing on numbers and whats goin to happen in my future if i dont fix it now!

 

[Lynz84]

Jeesh, @Lynz84 , you're throwing some seriously existential questions around here!

My take on getting to acceptance is:

Don't worry or think about your next a1c. Just apply a bit of common sense each day, the basic T1 rules you've learned, and the next a1c will work out ok as a result of that.

Don't obsess about carb-counting and writing everything down. It's a good starting point, but you'll get to a point where you can walk into any bar, restaurant, cafe on the planet, and just wing it a bit based on past experience and intuition. I'm not saying just guess, far from it, but being able to just make an educated judgment call on any meal you want gives a huge amount of freedom without feeling restricted. There's so many variables involved in our metabolisms that sometimes winging it a bit gets as good results as high teching it!

Accept that people around you will bend over backwards to help you if you hypo. People are kind.

I've been in this for 29 years. I'm always conscious that I'll need to pay attention to it every day, but I'm comfortable with that - I'm helping myself, and I know that others will help me if I'm not able to. I think I still had some resentment after 5 years, but it wears out.

Thanks Scott c!

As time has gone on I find myself more resentful and keep pushing myself to do things that Im probably just not ready to do yet so need to quit doing that! Recently all i can think of is..... this is my life forever.. (f### sake!)

 

[Juicyj]

Hi @Lynz84 when I start getting over whelmed with this I get out and do some exercise or even try medititation both will help hugely, it's just finding your coping technique to manage those thoughts and to deal with the day to day, or even set yourself a challenge do some fund raising, anything that takes your mind off managing your type 1, and of course talking, the most accessible thing you can do, talk to others whether on here of your nearest and dearest, tell them what your going through.

 

[TorqPenderloin]

I've accepted my diagnosis since day one. It's been 2 years now and I've always been prepared for a day where I felt differently but it still hasn't come.

My general mindset has been that management of T1D is 80% science and 20% art. Obviously, the reality is that it's 100% science but sometimes the answer is too complicated to explain.

I think that's really helped me avoid frustration. There are times where my blood sugar is inexplicably low/high. I try to figure out the science of why it probably happened. If I can't say with confidence, I equate it to the "Art" of maintaining good blood sugar levels. I don't beat myself up. I try to learn from it and move on.

I also view things like diet and exercise as important to everyone. It just matters more to us. I also think the technology is so good now that you can't compare studies and statistics from 20+ years ago when things were much more primitive.

Ultimately, there's always an answer. It's just a matter of researching/calculating/uncovering it. That's kept me in a sound state of mind to this point.

 

[isjoberg]

Probably only quite recently.. in terms of fully being at ease with it, in the last few years, but then again I am a diabetic and that's part of who I have always been.. I think the weird thing with being diagnosed before I remember is I never had a chance really to accept that I had diabetes, and then when I went through the this is rubbish phase, the doctors seemed to have no idea how to approach it as I have had it for so long. If anything I felt like I should be over it already but I never had a chance to be frustrated with my diagnosis.

 

[tim2000s]

Hi @Lynz84 - you might find these articles helpful as well: http://www.diabettech.com/diabetes/...sychological-effects-of-a-diabetes-diagnosis/ and http://www.diabettech.com/diabetes/my-diabetes-my-way-or-how-to-set-up-bike-handlebars/

It gives a bit of an insight into how I dealt with it.

 

[Lynz84]

Hi @Lynz84 when I start getting over whelmed with this I get out and do some exercise or even try medititation both will help hugely, it's just finding your coping technique to manage those thoughts and to deal with the day to day, or even set yourself a challenge do some fund raising, anything that takes your mind off managing your type 1, and of course talking, the most accessible thing you can do, talk to others whether on here of your nearest and dearest, tell them what your going through.

Thanks so much Juicyj! Ive recently started running. Im not great at it yet but at least im off the sofa and hoping to start a HR course to change careers so onwards and upwards!x

 

[Lynz84]

Hi @Lynz84 - you might find these articles helpful as well: http://www.diabettech.com/diabetes/...sychological-effects-of-a-diabetes-diagnosis/ and http://www.diabettech.com/diabetes/my-diabetes-my-way-or-how-to-set-up-bike-handlebars/

It gives a bit of an insight into how I dealt with it.

Thanks so much tim2000s!!! Both articles very helpful loved the Einstein quote and very true! X

 

[Tubzi]

Its been almost 10 years for me and i feel like i've only accepted it in the past few months.

Because of this forum and others i feel like i can embrace the community im a part of now.

 

[Lulu9101112]

Hi guys.

I posted earlier in the week about having a bad time with diabetes. Essentially throwing my toys out of the pram (ooops!!). I had a good long chat with my counsellor and he has suggested i may not have actually accepted the diagnosis and im stressing myself out trying to do things that i need to take more thought to do (exercise for example). My question to you all is this-
How do you know youve accepted it and how long did it take?
Ive been diagnosed 6 years and felt i was doing ok but in hindsight i have maybe just been plodding along and trying to ignore the condition!

It just depends everyones different we all have bad days. I've had for 11 years and i still sometimes feel bad days. we all accept it at different points. I've only just learned to accept it in a few past months no matter what people say. The thing i've learnt is to keep looking at the postives of your lives otherwise if you keep looking at the negatives you will be miserbale/

 

[Odin004]

Hi guys.

I posted earlier in the week about having a bad time with diabetes. Essentially throwing my toys out of the pram (ooops!!). I had a good long chat with my counsellor and he has suggested i may not have actually accepted the diagnosis and im stressing myself out trying to do things that i need to take more thought to do (exercise for example). My question to you all is this-
How do you know youve accepted it and how long did it take?
Ive been diagnosed 6 years and felt i was doing ok but in hindsight i have maybe just been plodding along and trying to ignore the condition!

Strange as it may sound, it took me 15 years to even begin to psychologically deal with my diagnosis - very oddly, I didn't even think about it when I was diagnosed; it was just a mathematical exercise for me - I just took insulin and matched it to my carbs, and led an almost "diabetes free" life. Last year, I had a bad hypo, and thought I was going to die - as well as all the panic and anxiety that brings, it also made me realise that I'd never actually processed the diagnosis in the first place, let alone accepted it.

To an extent, even now, I don't think it's really set in - and knowing how many advances we're making in medical science, somehow makes it all the more difficult to accept! I think it's important to just take each day as it comes, and accept that there'll be ups and downs (literally) - and do things to minimise the diabetes in your life and factor it out as much as possible - for me, a low carb diet has really helped, with a regular eating pattern. Others may find that exercise or hobbies may help; whatever works to "normalise" things, and make the diabetes as routine as possible, is worth doing!