I need advice

[catherinecherub]

Hi ebobeye,
You do not say if dad's diabetes is under control. Do you know what sort of readings he has for his blood sugars and what medication he is on. Two glasses of wine is not excessive and if he enjoys it and is not causing problems I would not be too concerned.
http://www.patient.co.uk/showdoc/27000262 will show you all about diabetic eye related problems.
Hope this helps,
Catherine.

 

[Trinkwasser]

John

paranoid control freak springs to mind

 

[Trinkwasser]

Does anyone know if there are any risks to eyes from diabetes?

Yes there are, from *uncontrolled* diabetes. Strangely dry red wine may actually help control it, may improve BG and also blood pressure. Well that's my excuse . . .

 

[Musicmaker]

Hello 'Trinkwasser',

I am the 'control Freak' you refer to in Donna (my wifes) thread, 'I need Advice'

I am absolutely 'Livid' over your postI and didn't want to publicly post this, but feel it is necessary, and demand an immediate appology - you (and others), have made terrible, almost slanderous comments in this thread - without any knowledge of the facts. Several members have Emailed me after my last post, and I have told them the following.

You do not know the FACTS - Donna is a Diabetic, yes! - However she is needs psychiatric care for paranoia, split personality, and fantasising. One day, she is the sweet, caring and loving wife, another, she is a screaming, foul mouthed 'banshee', twisiting anything said into a personal attack. I walk on a knife edge.

In the last few weeks, she has had Parkinsons Disease, Osteo Porosis, several strokes, fallen out of bed several times, and fallen downstairs twice (none of which I have heard, and no visual bruises, etc). Last night on the telephone to one of our few remaining friends, (all of whom have had violent verbal abuse from her), she said she had just been sick all over the bedroom - sadly, I could find no evidence.

Donna who is in 'real life called 'Sunny', was a very talented musician until these 'problems' of hers arose, please take a look at my Website, and see her, listen to her music (or mine, for that matter!), and you will perhaps understand a little more - click on the link below, and then on the heading 'SunnyH'
....

http://www.John4Music.TV

She says she hates Doctors, so will not see one, when she does, she asks for confidentiality (so I don't know anything!), and so the Doctor cannot help me understand. She hates the English, hates England, hates English food (at present she is living on Bananas, Toast and Breakfast Cereals), saying there is nothing in the house she can eat). She refuses to allow me to contact her Doctor to tell him of the problems.

Two days ago her 'Osteo Porosis' was so bad that she could only walk 'doubled up' and with a walking stick - leaning against walls, etc, with 2 inch steps - today she is fine, although she is acting as if 'drunk' with slurred incoherrent speech. Its all a call for sympathy, but sadly, she has exhausted everyones sympathy, and none of us can cope or help her any more. One day it will be a 'Genuine' illness, and it will be a case of 'cry Wolf'.

At 72 years of age, I too have several illnesses - Prostate, Deep Vein Thrombosis, causing two Pulmonary Embolisms in the last year (life-threatening admissions to Hospital!), I have Peripheral Vascular disease, which causes my legs to 'Balloon' and ulcerate, and have to have them dressed weekly. I keep all this to myself, and cope with it, but I just cannot cope with Donna. I walk on a knife edge, and will soon be a crazy as her. Our friends all think she needs 'sectioning'. I need no sympathy or ask help from anyone for myself.

Donna desparately needs help, but until she will admit and accept she has problems (Diabetes is the smallest one!). There is no solution.

I hope this post will be answered sensibly, and an unreserved appology given to me. Scurrilous posts, as some in this thread are most unhelpful and abusive.

John (The Musicmaker)

PS, after writing this Personal message to you, I have also decided to copy and past it into the offending thread. I am hopping mad!

(Later Edit) ...... I don't think Donna (Sunny) will post again on here, as I confronted her with what she had written, and a printed copy, which I am keeping for use as and when I can get 'official' help. However, should she post again, please bear in mind the above.
'J'

 

[Musicmaker]

I have just recieved the following Email, from another member ... (No Names, to save embarrasment) - Thank you my friend!

Good morning John.
I too saw Trinkwasser's comment and was myself angry because as you say it could be slander, and was yet more evidence of peoples ignorance. There is no doubt in my mind that it is slander.
I am so glad that you have posted your response in the open. Maybe now the 'sheep' who jumped in feet first will have the decency to apologise publicly to you. If nothing else it may make them think twice in future.
As you know I advised you to get a GP to assess Donna/Susan. I don't know if you took that advice. There are ways of her being seen by a GP or Social Workers with or without her
consent.
I do believe you and respect you. You have my full support. Make it clear in no uncertain terms that anyone who persists in these scurrilous comments may well have to justify themselves elsewhere ! Ask Dennis, Board Moderator to intervene and stop this in it's tracks.
Good luck

 

[Musicmaker]

.


Anon wrote:


John.
You might do well to post this extract on the forum as well.
Like your style. thank's for the Anon , appreciated.

Libel is the written word. Slander is spoken.

There are two versions of defamation, libel and slander. Libel is when the defamation is written down (including email, bulletin boards and websites), and slander is when the incident relates to words spoken.

In the UK, if someone thinks that what you wrote about them is either defamatory or damaging, the onus will be entirely on you to prove that your comments are true in court. In other words, if you make the claim, you've got to prove it!


Once again, dear friend, thank you so much for your interest and offered support. I certainly don't need more 'hassle' in my life, by taking the matter any further than asking for an appolgy from posters above. Lets see what their response or (I suspect !)- 'silence', is. They must be judged on that. It takes a big person to admit their errors publicly.

I agree this thread is not in the best interests or in the light of this wonderful Forum, but may I ask the Moderators to at least leave it open and intact until such time as people can see the damage that can be caused by 'Jumping in at the deep end' , and without thought of the consequences of their uninformed words, based on a lack of the needed information, and to appologise.

Peace, Light and Love to all members,

John

 

[catherinecherub]

Hi musicmaker,
This is a forum and no one has any way of knowing if a poster is genuine. You can be who you want to be and post accordingly.
The replies received to Donna's posting were mostly in good faith and other people cannot be held accountable for their responses to what they saw as a cry for help. We still do not know what is going on as we now have conflicting stories about the situation.
I do not see anything offensive in my replies and can assure you that I am not a sheep. My comments were written to try and help someone who appeared to be in distress and given the same scenario I would not hesitate to do it again.
Catherine.

 

[chocoholic]

Re-iteratng Catherine's comments above, I too posted believing I was answering a genuine plea for help. Of course, there are always two sides to a story and we are in a difficult position now, being faced with conflicting postings. If yours is the genuine story, then I understand your angst and hope you too will appreciate those who replied to Donna's original posting were simply trying to reassure her out of genuine concern. I hope Donna will get the help she clearly needs.

 

[Dennis]

John,

Thank you for your suggestions and understanding. I will, as you suggest, leave this thread but will lock it as I do not believe that anything will be gained by adding further comment to it. As I am sure you must appreciate, many people contact this forum every day, desperate for help, advice and guidance following a diagnosis that has left them in a state of shock and confusion. We are not privy to their private lives and can only respond to what we are told. In providing that response, the people on this forum go out of their way to be helpful to others. None are paid for this (including the moderators) and all do it only because they want to help others get through the trauma of being diagnosed as having a lifetime (and life threatening) chronic condition.

If you were to look back at what was originally written by “Donna”, and concentrate only on the information that was provided rather than what you know to be the case, I would be very surprised if you would react any differently to the way our members did in responding to Donna. The fact that you have taken this as a personal slight on you is very understandable in the light of what you have since told us. But that is information that was not known to the members who did respond to a cry for help.

I only hope that what seems to have happened here will not deter our members from responding in the future to pleas for help from desperate people, as they have done in thousands of cases in the past.