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I'm a binger and I can't be trusted

MrsA2

Expert
Messages
6,932
Type of diabetes
Type 2
Treatment type
Diet only
So I popped out today for a few bits from the supermarket, working from a list of low carb for a picnic tomorrow but then I found myself in the chocolate aisle looking for some Lindt and found 3 types of 85% including one flavoured with mint. Not too bad at 33g I thought, I'll have just one square at a time.

Well 3 squares disappeared in the car on the way home, and the rest of the bar after dinner. I'd hidden the purchase from the boys and now feel so bad and guilty. I'm even hiding the wrappings so they don't find out what I've done.
Did I even have a thought of losing a foot or my eyesight? No
Did I even try to stop myself? No
Did I even like it very much? No, it's too sweet and too easily eaten
What has it done to my bg? Don't know as I wont even test myself

This is only the 3rd or 4th time I've gone food shopping since being diagnosed mid March. Turns out I cannot trust myself. Turns out shopping was where I bought myself treats and try as I might buying cheeses and meats didn't get anywhere near the pleasure zone

How can I stop doing this in future?
Online deliveries for ever I suppose, but they just dont do what I want sometimes
Have even contemplated allowing hubby to come with me, even after saying never again as he costs us too much !

I feel rubbish
 
Pick yourself up and move on. Can’t change the past. I think nearly all of us have been there before. You’ll learn from that feeling of failure. Chin up.
 
@MrsA2 its an addiction issue. Several of us (including me) have them and they rear their head at unexpected and sometimes unexpected moments.

Easy to say and hard to do, but try not to beat yourself up.

Try and come up with some strategies - trying to remember that you didn’t enjoy the chocolate so much and it made you feel rubbish might help, for example.
 
Addiction it is.
I was really hopeful that 3 months cold Turkey had done the trick but fallen at first hurdle.
Does it never end?
 
MrsA2 said:
Addiction it is.
I was really hopeful that 3 months cold Turkey had done the trick but fallen at first hurdle.
Does it never end?
Click to expand...
Yea it does, but you have to persevere. It took me 4 weeks to break carb addiction and I fell off the wagon a number of times.
 
Twenty years ago it took me four attempts to quit smoking. The fourth crack only worked because I was sick of failing the other three times. It’ll work itself out in the end.
 
MrsA2 said:
Addiction it is.
I was really hopeful that 3 months cold Turkey had done the trick but fallen at first hurdle.
Does it never end?
Click to expand...

You might find some of the posts in these threads helpful:

https://www.diabetes.co.uk/forum/threads/food-addiction-and-diabetes.156651/
https://www.diabetes.co.uk/forum/threads/lchf-advice-for-a-carb-addict.167868/

There are others, but I’m having trouble locating them right now.

Personally, the longer I can stay ‘on the wagon’ the easier it gets. Falling off takes a big effort and a lot of willpower to get back on track.
 
Jim Lahey said:
Twenty years ago it took me four attempts to quit smoking. The fourth crack only worked because I was sick of failing the other three times. It’ll work itself out in the end.
Click to expand...
I found kicking smoking quite easy, used nicotine gum.
And one can do without it for life. Its sooo much harder to give up some foods but not others, and they keep the cigs behind locked doors these days!
 
@MrsA2 - I very strongly recommend you find the time to watch this video. In my view it is both excellent and comforting to understand that far from being and "only me" scenario, food addictions and hiding some eating events are really rather common.

 
Yes I will.
I started it tonight but internet playing up
Funnily enough I can easily walk passed the pasta, and the bread, and the cakes, and the potatoes and the rice... its just the chocolate leaps out and forces me...
 
Facing my demons...bg tests
1+ hour 8.5
2+ hours 9
3+ hours 6.9

(Not sure of time when I started eating it. Just know it took about 10 minutes to gobble)
 
Well.... I do find it easier to just not go down whole aisles in the supermarket. I never go down the sweetie aisle, or the bread, or the biscuits, or the crisps... you get the idea. So I can’t be tempted. I only have to shop for myself though, more difficult if you have carb munchers to buy for!
 
That works if you’re only shopping for yourself. If you have non low carbers you feed not so easy to avoid them all. I share the issue of shopping treats and online has been a boon in that sense. Not shopping hungry and finding non food treats help a bit.
 
You said it yourself, this is only the third or fourth time of shopping for your new way of eating. It is going to take a while to make this normal. As Jim said, pick yourself up, put it behind you and move on. It's pointless beating yourself up over a mistake. Next time though. For there almost certainly will be a next time, buy only one bar. Or look for higher percentage. Or pass the aisle by. Take that moment to think, yes you can do this.
 
Here in the Netherlands we have a pick-up point... I order my groceries online, show up at the store's desk at the entrance, and they give me my groceries. I don't have to go into the supermarket, just take what they give me and leave. I do think that's been my salvation. That, and if I ever do have to go in there, I don't ever go in hungry.

I used to hate Lindt 99%, as it was so bitter it made my toes curl, but now I actually detect a little sweetness in there. They're expensive, there's only 50 grams to a whole bar, but in turn, only 2 grams of carbs. And it's so very, very chocolate-y, you can't eat a half bar in one go anyway. Might be something to try.

All in all though... It's not the end of the world. Otherwise all of us would've caused the apocalypse a few times over. Just take care of yourself, live and learn. And don't beat yourself up too much!
Jo
 
MrsA2 said:
Yes I will.
I started it tonight but internet playing up
Funnily enough I can easily walk passed the pasta, and the bread, and the cakes, and the potatoes and the rice... its just the chocolate leaps out and forces me...
Click to expand...

Don't know how far into the film you got, but there were some absolute gems in there, for many, MANY people. Stick with it.

I don't think it matters if the addiction is to chocolate, biscuits, crisps or whatever, it's the drivers and behaviours that are very insightful, in my view. Just don't take all the items (whether it be chips, lemon meringue pies or chocolate) too literally.

I would wager there would be a very goodly number on here who would admit to "finding" wrappers in their handbags, manbags, pockets or side pockets in their cars.

It's not a crime, nor a reason for self-flagellation. If it's only happening once in a while, why care?

Various organisations suggest addictions take 21 days to break, and others cite 2.5 months to break a bad habit, so there's no definite time-frame, in my view. That lockdown removed you from your habit possibly just put a pause into your habit breaking process.

Stick with it. Things do get easier. You've hit a bump in the road, but today's a new day.
 
There are some Lindt and other brand chocolate bars which are very much lower than 33gms carbs per 100 gms.
I only eat the absolute lowest ones I can find, and then try to limit myself to one strip.
However with my amazing will power I almost always end up eating half a bar.
This after over 1yr on Low Carb.
 
ianf0ster said:
with my amazing will power I almost always end up eating half a bar.
This after over 1yr on Low Carb.
Click to expand...
Thx ! I was feeling so bad for not having broken habit in 4 months
 
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