• Guest - w'd love to know what you think about the forum! Take the 2025 Survey »

Is this right?

Steph5911

Steph5911

Newbie
Messages
2
Location
United Kingdom
Type of diabetes
Type 1
Treatment type
Insulin
Dislikes
No much to be honest. Fish, hypos, diabetic jokes and lucozade
When me and my mum get into agreements she always blames my diabetes but she doesn't care about it any other time because apparently to her diabetes just makes me a ***** and there's nothing else wring with me.

I'm sick of this stupid condition I know it's only been 4 years for me and I salute people that have dealt with it longer. I guess I just feeli really alone and I'm sick of my mum using my diabetes as a weapon. In a really heated agreement she takes my insulin and throws it In the bin along with my blood glucose monitor I get it back out but it really hurts cause I feel she thinks it's just nothing.

I don't really know how you're meant to use this forum cause I'm new but if someone could please talk I'm really appreciate it.
 
It is difficult for those of us who have the condition but for those around us it can be equally upsetting; especially close family. Have you ever thought that she might be blaming herself; thinking she caused it (genetics etc)? This is little excuse for throwing away the things that contribute to keeping you alive. Say that to her; if she throws away those things and damages any of it then she risks you life. Be brutally honest with her and she may get msg.

Hypos can cause problems with relationships, especially if you get ratty or confused. Maybe introduce her to this forum as we have carers on here also. There are mums of kids with this condition and she can get help/advice from them? What are your other family members like?
 
Dazza1984 said:
It is difficult for those of us who have the condition but for those around us it can be equally upsetting; especially close family. Have you ever thought that she might be blaming herself; thinking she caused it (genetics etc)? This is little excuse for throwing away the things that contribute to keeping you alive. Say that to her; if she throws away those things and damages any of it then she risks you life. Be brutally honest with her and she may get msg.

Hypos can cause problems with relationships, especially if you get ratty or confused. Maybe introduce her to this forum as we have carers on here also. There are mums of kids with this condition and she can get help/advice from them? What are your other family members like?
Click to expand...

That's not the problem my mum would never go on this forum because it's not her problem. Diabetes is mine so therefore that makes it my problem. It's mainly when I'm high that I get really frustrated and just snap when someone says something and I don't mean it I tried to explain to her how I felt one day but she said that diabetes wasn't her fault. I also told her that she can't threaten me by throwing my insulin away because I need it but that message never sinks in.

I have two relatives that are Type 2 diabetics that think they know everything but I don't listen to them. I don't have anyone in my family that's every had it I had an aunt (not by blood) who had it but she died of cancer when I was 6 so I can't really turn for help there.
 
i think you need to try again with your mum, and get her to wake up to the fact that this is a life threatening illness, and it will be too late when your gone..............sorry to be so blunt, but sometimes you just have to be
 
Hi Steph
I agree with Dazza that your mum may have issues with guilt and denial, it certainty sounds like it ad throwing away your insulin and meter is extreme :wideyed:

Having diabetes is more than having a problem, it's much more and affects many aspects of your life. It's certainly not just " your problem " to deal with alone. Your mum must be aware of the implications of you having diabetes from being told of your diagnosis, does she attend your appointments with you ?

As for support for you, you will find plenty here :) I'm bumping this thread and replying now as I missed it when you first posted it , and I'm sure others will be able to offer advice. I had a similar situation but with an ex partner, and that was a toxic relationship altogether ! :eek: What worked for me then would be quite different for lack of support from a family member.

Hang in there and keep posting :)

Signy
 
Have you tried writing a letter? Words are powerful and scary, if you could write what you feel it might be cathartic for you but it will also show your mum how you really feel.
 
Steph5911 said:
When me and my mum get into agreements she always blames my diabetes but she doesn't care about it any other time because apparently to her diabetes just makes me a ***** and there's nothing else wring with me.

I'm sick of this stupid condition I know it's only been 4 years for me and I salute people that have dealt with it longer. I guess I just feeli really alone and I'm sick of my mum using my diabetes as a weapon. In a really heated agreement she takes my insulin and throws it In the bin along with my blood glucose monitor I get it back out but it really hurts cause I feel she thinks it's just nothing.

I don't really know how you're meant to use this forum cause I'm new but if someone could please talk I'm really appreciate it.
Click to expand...

I think that this is really scarey. It may be worth talking to your diabetic care team and get advice. She cannot throw your medicines and test kit away - that is bullying, and extremely dangerous. Your diabetic team may wish you to bring your mother into the clinic, and talk to her.
Good luck.
 
Hi :) my Mum definitely uses diabetes as a weapon too..complete blackmail.! I feel its my fault when there's a fight or disagreement because she lectures me on how it has changed everyones lives in our family (I think its true but overdramatic) ..how are your diabetes nurses or doctors ..are they helpful ? Mine seem to be against me all the time and my mums with them. Its hard enough having diabetes but then having to deal with extra aggro doesn't help either..feel free to pm me anytime :)

Sent from the Diabetes Forum App
 
Hi Steph, the short answer to your question, is no, this is absolutely NOT right. I'm so sorry your mum is acting this way.
Diabetes should be as much her problem as it is yours, she is your mother after all. Is it worth asking your diabetes team to speak to her, or asking your gp if they could advise on whether family therapy may be suitable, or do you think she'd refuse this anyway?
Have you thought about looking into local support groups? Or joining Facebook diabetes groups? It's important to have someone to support you, even if it's not a relative or close friend.

I hope you find the help you need!

Sarah xXx


Sent from the Diabetes Forum App
 
Back
Top