Living with a partner with uncontrolled type 2 diabetes

Mud Island Dweller said:

Oh for gods sake .... It appears neither of you read my post properly (quel surprise) if you had you would understand as Molly did where l was coming from l said SUBTLE but used stronger to explain where l was coming from. Had you read Mollys reply to me you would have maybe understood.

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Oh dear....hope that I have not started an argument

I respect everyone's comments, thoughts, opinions and advice so thank you to all that have replied.

If at any point I sound flippant, insensitive or uncaring it is just my way of dealing with the situation and the emotional rollercoaster that I find myself on at the moment.

Apologies if anything I have said has offended anyone.........

Mud Island Dweller said:

Living drama working drama waiting for holiday drama

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Thankfully the only drama going on this week is at the theatre....preparing for helping out at 3 performances tomorrow with 13 hour stint at the theatre!

Looking forward to break next week (going away for a few days to visit a friend) so not sure what drama that may bring whilst I am away.....will hopefully have to get things back on track on my return as not sure what has been going on over the last week.

Has been good to do something for myself that I enjoy ....was a much needed break from day to day drama.

It's quarter to one on a sunny summer afternoon and he is still in bed, asleep!

Should I go and wake him up and remind him to get up....he has not had his morning medication.....or should I just leave him and enjoy the peace and quiet?

Am thinking the latter, after all he is an adult and I am not his mother .....as people have reminded me on a number of occasions.

Time for some lunch for one

Mud Island Dweller said:

often going off to sleep for any reason is a sign of depression not read Catherins links so may say that (out for coffee limited connect) but does he have depression?

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@Mud Island Dweller Could well have depression.....or boredom....or lack of things to do. He is already on anti depressants (sertraline) - doctor has just increased dosage by another 50mg per day...plus amitriptyline for nerve pain (but also technically an anti-depressant) so should be well covered in terms of medication for this.

Eventually woke him up about 1.30pm after my lunch and he got up but has gone back up for a "lie down" at 5 pm. Think sometimes it is just lack of motivation / nothing to do and he has just got himself into some really bad habits which he is unable to break out of.

He probably doesn't even see there is anything wrong with what he is doing but I think it is such a waste of a life....life is for living, not lying in bed.......

Am making the most of the peace and quiet to get done what I want to do so does have a positive side .....though can be so frustrating too

Hope you enjoyed your coffee

Mud Island Dweller said:

Bents garden Centre have cappuccinos to die for and so my treat. If you live in the North West then you have to visit them.... and they are making the place even bigger!

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Re the garden centre....am up your way later this week staying with a friend in Chester for a few days.......going to Tatton Park Flower Show on Thursday ...some quality "me time" ....will know where to go for coffee if we fancy a trip out another day!

Mud Island Dweller said:

If you get a chance visit Chester Zoo well kept and amazing gardens. if you go there then go to the big eating place/restaurant opposite the tiger cages it is set into about 5 different serving areas. The first one does lovely salads and the last one green salad with coleslaw yummmy
Another place is Trentham Gardens Garden Center.
l prefer Bents though have to say their eating place is heaven have own chefs for each section and the salad bar is droooooling it is pricey but as a treat. if not raining eat outside on the terrace by the little lake and fountain

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@Mud Island Dweller ....thanks for the info...my friend lives within walking distance of the zoo so on our list of places to go

Mud Island Dweller said:

One mistake you are making is assuming that the medication he is on for depression is fine, l know to well after dealing with mum over the years there is no one pill will do. Sometimes the correct pill and or dose and or combination is never found. If he doesn't see a psychologist l would start hassling for one. If you can afford it look to private it is about £60/hr

The sleeping is more likely to be depression than boredom related and in a brain fog hard to concentrate the bloody antidepressants are evil after what my mum when through on them l do not trust them.

I have the following 2 sites that may be of use l do not know how good or bad they are but you may find advice there as well.

Closed facebook group for diabetics with depression

Site for diabetics with depression

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@Mud Island Dweller Sorry, probably gave the wrong message in previous post about anti-depressants....as you rightly say it is difficult to get the right anti-depressant / combination of tablets and as you also say perhaps the right combination for an individual is never found. I do not have any personal experience of this type of medication as when I suffered from mild depression in the past I was adamant with my GP at the time that was not the route I wished to go down and sought other means / alternatives in order to improve my mood.....from what I remember : exercise / finding a new hobby (gardening) / hypnotherapy seemed to do the trick for me back then.

With regards to seeing a psychologist this is a good idea but don't think he would be receptive to this....a while ago the GP suggested he went along to a talking therapy / CBT session; he went to the first,found it a 'waste of time' and promptly cancelled the remaining sessions offered.

For myself, when I was getting really stressed about all of this, I requested from my GP to attend similar talking therapy as thought it would help me to address the situation and look for solutions - unfortunately rather than one to one sessions I was sent on a six week 'Stress and Mood Management Course' (one evening per week) which covered the basics in a lecture environment; personally it didn't really help but by completing this I thought it would leave the door open for further help / one to one sessions in the future....have not pursued this at the moment as really busy with other things but have the forms to complete if and when needed.

Having found this forum though I may not follow the other up as have found this an excellent form of therapy just talking to others and getting feedback and advice.....would highly recommend to others

Thanks for the links - was not sure about the Facebook one as would need to join group and not sure I want that showing on my Facebook page; the other link looked useful so will return to that later.