Hi Molly
tbh, I was determined not to post on this forum again, but after reading this thread I decided to make this one exception.
It seems your husband is in denial, because he's afraid of changes, he's afraid he'll have to give up what he likes - and he's refusing testing because he doesn't want to see the consequences. And it seems that warning there will be painful complications, don't work either.
That could have been mine story, you know.
When the GP first told me I have diabetes, I felt the same. I thought I would have to give up everything I liked. When I came home, I spent hours crying. Then I ate a very bad lunch, complete with a chocolate cake. Then I felt guilty, so for dinner, I only ate a bowl of salad. Few hours later, I got all the lovely symptoms of the hypo. I tested my BG, and it was 2.2. So then I cried some more, because I thought that's what my life would be like from that day.
Frankly, if anyone tried to force low-carb diet on me, if I was told I had to avoid all things I liked, I would be in the same situation as your husband is now. I was real real lucky that LCHF is pretty much uknown here and that there were no low-carb fans to shove it down my neck (the aggressive promotion of low-carb diet as the only solution for diabetes is the main reason I stopped coming to this forum, tbh. It's useful if you follow a low-carb diet, but otherwise it's actually discouraging and negativistic.)
The next day I had a meeting with my diabetologist. Unlike the doctors low-carb fans mention here, she's neither uneducated jerk, nor the incarnation of evil, and didn't give me a lot of stupid advice waiting till my diabetes gets worse. (And I don't believe she's so unique, either.) She's very nice, patient, and experienced, since she specializes in diabetes for thirty years. She told me that
a well educated diabetic can eat anything. And that while I must start with 150 grams of carbs per day, once I get it under the control, and still want more, we can see if that's possible.
It was great relief to hear that, and quite motivating! Yeah, I could limit myself for a few months or a year, if it means I don't have to give up everything, and that I can still have a normal life.
I have been allowed to eat bread, rice, pasta, potatoes, carrot, corn, oat flakes, bananas, and all the other things low-carb fans here say you should never ever eat. That
doesn't mean I eat whatever and whenever I want. I got a meal plan with the amount of carbs I'm allowed to eat for each meal (for me it's 150 grams of carbs in 3 main meals and 3 snacks), and I had to learn to determine the size of the portion. During the first week, they always seemed too small, but it really isn't difficult to get used to it. I also had to change my drinking regime - instead of 2 litres of coke, I now drink 2 litres of water, and I had to start doing some exercises (as much as I can, as I have a problem with the backbone).
And the results? Well. According to low-carb fans here, my diabetes should have worsened.
Instead, in 4 months, my BG dropped from 16 before meal and 24 2 hours after to 4.4 before meal and 5.3 2 hours later. And, despite being on insulin, I lost 10 kilos. If my level of C-peptid weren't too low, I'd already be off the insulin...
Last weekend, I had a real pizza. Well, a mini pizza, but better than nothing.

And no, I didn't put a lot of fat cheese on it (yuck), I just calculated the number of carbs in the whole dough and then split it to 5 mini pizzas, so they were within my allowed limit for meal... I ate salad of leafy veggies 20 minutes before, and went for a 15 minutes walk afterwards. My BG was perfectly normal.
Yesterday my friend invited me for a lunch, and I had a piece of normal cheesecake with strawberries. Two hours later, my BG was slightly above my average, but well within the 2 mmol limit, and below six (4.2 before the lunch, 5.6 2 hours later)...
See, there's no reason to be afraid of diet or insulin. A bit of discipline for a few months, and he can see in the testings how well he's improving, every day! A bit of determination, and next Christmas, he can have a piece of a mince pie, without having to worry it'll kill him.
I wish both your husband and you good luck and a lot of optimism. He can do it! If a crybaby like me succeeded, anyone can.
