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My daughter has just been diagnosed and I feel horrendous guilt

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Pops2014

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Hi everyone
I am T1 diabetic and have been since I was 3. I am now 37.

Last Friday, my 7 year old daughter was diagnosed with T1.
She has been absolutely AMAZING but the guilt I feel is immense it’s only been a week since diagnosis and it feels so raw. I feel totally sick and have hardly eaten ever since. She is so beautifully innocent and has no idea that T1 will be a challenge her whole life. I feel she’s been robbed of so much.

Anyone else in this position? To my daughter I’m positive and have a real ‘can do’ attitude about it. As they say ‘fake it til you make it’.
 
Jesus that's tough, especially this time of year.

Guess what, she's got a great father, an early educator so she can hit the ground running.
She will also grow up in the era of CGMs, pumps & looped systems.

It's a blessing you are her father.
 
Pops2014 said:
Hi everyone
I am T1 diabetic and have been since I was 3. I am now 37.

Last Friday, my 7 year old daughter was diagnosed with T1.
She has been absolutely AMAZING but the guilt I feel is immense it’s only been a week since diagnosis and it feels so raw. I feel totally sick and have hardly eaten ever since. She is so beautifully innocent and has no idea that T1 will be a challenge her whole life. I feel she’s been robbed of so much.

Anyone else in this position? To my daughter I’m positive and have a real ‘can do’ attitude about it. As they say ‘fake it til you make it’.
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I really feel for you and can understand your feelings but you will begin to feel better once the diagnosis kicks in & you see how resilient your wee daughter is. Thinking of you x
 
@Pops2014 I can relate to this from the other end of the equation.

I was diagnosed aged 8 and I learnt later that my T1 mother (who had no family history of T1 and was diagnosed very late in her early 20s) felt amazingly guilty.

I have always been very grateful to her for diagnosing me early, never letting me think that diabetes could stop me from doing anything, and helping to show me that diabetes is just a part of life rather than an overriding concern. I am very glad to be alive, with or without diabetes, and in no way blame my mother for the diabetes. So I'm very glad that my mum didn't let her T1 stop her from having children (and in those days T1 pregnancies were difficult).

And I agree with the others that modern technology for T1s is way way way better than when I was diagnosed in the days before glucometers.
 
EllieM said:
@Pops2014 I can relate to this from the other end of the equation.

I was diagnosed aged 8 and I learnt later that my T1 mother (who had no family history of T1 and was diagnosed very late in her early 20s) felt amazingly guilty.

I have always been very grateful to her for diagnosing me early, never letting me think that diabetes could stop me from doing anything, and helping to show me that diabetes is just a part of life rather than an overriding concern. I am very glad to be alive, with or without diabetes, and in no way blame my mother for the diabetes. So I'm very glad that my mum didn't let her T1 stop her from having children (and in those days T1 pregnancies were difficult).

And I agree with the others that modern technology for T1s is way way way better than when I was diagnosed in the days before glucometers.
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Thank you so much for this reply, it’s really insightful. I really hope I can do just as good a job as your mum. I’ve had four T1 pregnancies and my god they aren’t easy, but are so worth it.

I just feel in such shock at the moment

Thanks so much for all your replies
 
You gave your daughter life and I am certain that if you ask her now or in twenty years time she will say the same, that she is glad to be alive with diabetes than not alive, live as an diabetic is still great, I will be 70 in the not to distant future and have been a diabetic for over 50 years and I am still enjoying life, So don't be upset just enjoy your daughter as I am sure she enjoys you
 
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