- Messages
- 746
- Type of diabetes
- Type 2
- Treatment type
- Tablets (oral)
Questions and Answers from
Retired People
Q: Where can single men over the age of 70 find
younger women who are interested in them?
A: Try a bookstore, under
Fiction.
Q: What can a man do while his wife is going
Throughmenopause?
A: Keep busy. If you're handy with tools, you can
finish the basement. When you're done, you will have a place to
live.
Q: Someone has told me that menopause is
mentioned in the bible.
Is that true?
Where can it be
found?
A: Yes. Matthew 14:92:
"And Mary rode
Joseph's ass all the way to Egypt"
Q: How can you increase the heart rate of your
over-70 year-old husband?
A: Tell him you're
pregnant.
Q: How can you avoid that terrible curse of the
elderly wrinkles?
A: Take off your
glasses.
Q: Seriously! What can I do for these crow's feet
and all those wrinkles on my face?
A: Go bra less. It will usually pull them
out!
Q: Why should 70-plus year old people use valet
parking?
A: Valets don't forget where they park your
car.
Q: Is it common for 70-plus year olds to have
problems with short term memory storage?
A: Storing memory is not a problem. Retrieving it
is the problem.
Q: As people age, do they sleep more soundly?
A: Yes, but usually in the
afternoon.
Q: Where should 70-plus year olds look for eye
glasses?
A: On their
foreheads.
Q: What is the most common remark made by 70-plus
year olds when they enter antique stores?
A: "Gosh, I remember
these!"
SMILE,
You've Still Got Your Sense Of
Humor, Haven't You?
"To one who has faith, no explanation is necessary. To one without faith, no explanation is possible."
--St. Thomas Aquinas
"Indeed I tremble for my country when I reflect that God is just: that his justice cannot sleep for ever." --Thomas Jefferson, Notes on the State of Virginia, Query 18, 1781
Retired People
Q: Where can single men over the age of 70 find
younger women who are interested in them?
A: Try a bookstore, under
Fiction.
Q: What can a man do while his wife is going
Throughmenopause?
A: Keep busy. If you're handy with tools, you can
finish the basement. When you're done, you will have a place to
live.
Q: Someone has told me that menopause is
mentioned in the bible.
Is that true?
Where can it be
found?
A: Yes. Matthew 14:92:
"And Mary rode
Joseph's ass all the way to Egypt"
Q: How can you increase the heart rate of your
over-70 year-old husband?
A: Tell him you're
pregnant.
Q: How can you avoid that terrible curse of the
elderly wrinkles?
A: Take off your
glasses.
Q: Seriously! What can I do for these crow's feet
and all those wrinkles on my face?
A: Go bra less. It will usually pull them
out!
Q: Why should 70-plus year old people use valet
parking?
A: Valets don't forget where they park your
car.
Q: Is it common for 70-plus year olds to have
problems with short term memory storage?
A: Storing memory is not a problem. Retrieving it
is the problem.
Q: As people age, do they sleep more soundly?
A: Yes, but usually in the
afternoon.
Q: Where should 70-plus year olds look for eye
glasses?
A: On their
foreheads.
Q: What is the most common remark made by 70-plus
year olds when they enter antique stores?
A: "Gosh, I remember
these!"
SMILE,
You've Still Got Your Sense Of
Humor, Haven't You?
"To one who has faith, no explanation is necessary. To one without faith, no explanation is possible."
--St. Thomas Aquinas
"Indeed I tremble for my country when I reflect that God is just: that his justice cannot sleep for ever." --Thomas Jefferson, Notes on the State of Virginia, Query 18, 1781