I happen to have been "accidentally" directed to this site / discussion post. What are the odds of that?
So, I read your message, and I joined your forum site.
I think what you are describing, is that your husband is experiencing an episode of depression, brought about by his deteriorating diabetic control among other things. Now, ... don't get me wrong. I'm not saying that his depression is in a "clinical alert" condition, but what I mean is that his state of mind has evolved into a level that effects both his health and that of those around him.
First and foremost, his present state of mind is completely and absolutely reversible. Obviously he has a loving wife that goes above and beyond the call of duty, to attend to his diabetic nutritional needs and is truly concerned about his health and well-being. So give yourself a huge pat on the back.
Now it's time to regroup the troops and think about a strategy that might work to alleviate his self-spiral.
There are many factors that can crush an individual's will to adhere to a strict diet. You have already conquered the most difficult part already, and that is the support of your family. The next step, would be to have those people around him, to also (and yes I do mean "YOU" also) join into a healthier nutritional lifestyle. Nothing is more difficulty than sitting there with your rabbit food, and everyone else is chowing down on those delicious mounds of sugar loaded treats and then washing it all down with that ever so needed gallon of fizzy soda-pop. Your husband fells contained, isolated and excluded. He lashes out, by consuming those pernicious and well-advertised calorie bombs of "fell good" food, that destroy our bodies every day.
If you had to relegate yourself to the meals that are meant for him, ... would you be able to maintain his diet? I surely believe that you could, ... and so would the rest of your family. That's because the one thing that diabetes forces its victims to endure, is a healthy diet. What you must understand, is that this is an opportunity for the whole family to join with your husband on a path to better nutrition. It may sound cavalier, but think about it. If your whole family were to eat better, then it's a win-win situation. The family would reap the benefits of a better diet, and your husband would not be so alone and easily tempted. I can tell you from experience that it only takes a little effort to switch to a more healthy diet, that all can enjoy. Because I clearly remember thinking that it was so unfair, that my spouse was snacking and enjoying frosted cake and chocolate treats while I sat there with my salad. I may not have said anything, but I surely felt that way. It wasn't too long before I was cheating on my diet, and my numbers went out of control.
The reason that I zeroed-in on the treats, is that they are readily available to the rest of the family, and therefore to him. That's because you said that he was a couch potato, and therefore, ... where did the treats come from? The answer is that the cupboard was already supplied with them. It might be impossible for the family to quit "cold-turkey", so try to phase out the real offenders. You will also find, that when the whole family moves to a better diet, your husband will feel much better about his tolerance to the "green stuff".
Please don't take this message as a criticism of your food choices. I am merely pointing out that the starchy food industry has thoroughly and deeply ingrained into our society, their preferred (and profitable) food options. Absolutely every item that is contained in a grocery store, is carefully displayed to promote the greatest profit, irrespective of the nutritional value. We are constantly bombarded with senseless promotions to buy the quickest and easiest (and tasty) foods. The labour of love, that must be expended to find and purchase the foods that are most advantageous, is something difficult. The mere fact that you had prepared a special diet for him, also means that the rest of the family can benefit from your skills. In fact, if you were to involve the rest of the family in the preparation of a varied series or selection of pre-cooked meals, it would teach them to appreciate the heroic efforts that cooking for a whole family really is. Who knows, ... it might even be a "family time" opportunity. The self-sufficiency skills that your children will need in the future will be well served by an early indoctrination of nutritional and culinary arts. Just the simple task of properly feeding ourselves in this fast and disposable society, is an activity that has been mostly neglected or lost.
With a lot of research, and a little trial and error, you will find those food gems that are both dietary responsible and that also have the ingredients to satisfy your taste buds. Sometimes it's buying the right oil and spices that can make all the difference.
The best advise that I can give you is, CUT DOWN ON THE SALT, and everything that contains it. The amount of salt that is infused into our daily consumption simply staggers the mind. Absolutely everything has gobs of sodium in it. You can't get away from it. The food manufacturing conglomerates have found the perfect way to make their **** taste good, and that is by tossing mounds of salt in their products. A good way to fool yourself into believing that you are still ingesting your favourite pile of salt, is to use a salt grinder rather than using a salt shaker (with store bought salt crystals). The reason is that a grinder can emit a very fine salt powder that will excite the tongue to the same degree that those many times larger salt crystals will. A good example of "less is more". Plus, ... the decreased consumption of salt will greatly assist to diminish the pain and swelling in the extremities (especially in the feet). Remember, ... high blood pressure kills.
This may sound silly, but, offer to massage his feet. At first it may hurt him depending on his circulatory condition (possible neuropathy), but with a little TLC he will start to purrrr. At that point, you can ask for his co-operation in his better diet adherence (or for that expensive trip around the world) and the answer will always be ... yes.
Another good tip, is to drink plenty of water. Day by day (or soon enough), what he will feel is a lessened need to urinate. You might think that this statement is contradictory, but it isn't. The reason that the bathroom breaks are so often needed by diabetics is because the bladder is swollen and irritated. Being properly hydrated goes a long way in eliminating the toxins from the body. Please note, that in some bottled water, they stuff sodium into their ingredients. I suspect that they do so, to increase the use of their product.
Don't forget to eliminate gluten from your diet. It has no nutritional value whatsoever, and is exclusively used to make food stuff more palatable to the unsuspecting consumer. It is the worst thing for a diabetic. There is nothing good about it, yet it is almost everywhere. Try to read the labels carefully, and avoid the foods that have it (if possible).
A warning to all !!! Please do some research about the artificial sweetener called "Splenda" or "Sucralose" (or its other equivalent names). This garbage started out as an insecticide (1976, in the UK), and was later approved as a sugar substitute only because it did not cause cancer. What I have learned is that they slightly varied the toxicity level for human consumption. The company has played with the use of the wording of "sugar substitute", by referring to the end result of fabrication rather than the actual content. The long term effect of this product on the human physiology has been sidestepped. Basically it is almost pure sugar, with an ingredient added (chlorine) that paralyzes the stomach from absorbing the sugar. Therefore it tastes like sugar, because it is mostly sugar. Rather than take my word for it, just Google the words "Splenda" and "side effects" together. You will be horrified at the specific formulation and history of this product. If you were to eat a whole pie made with this stuff as a sweetener, your rectum may start to bleed. Even at lesser amounts of Splenda (or repeated/continued use of it), your bowels will be affected (ie. irritation, itchy, swollen, gas). Unfortunately, some people will experience a trace of rectal bleeding after only using Splenda after a short period of time. The way that the pesticide works is, that the formulation prevents the termite queen's ability to feed by paralyzing its ability to digest. So no queen equals no termites. Of course the pesticide is not labelled "Splenda". The chemical formulation and the manufacturing patent are available on the internet. If you are already using Splenda in the preparation of the foods that your husband ingests, that too may account for his ill health condition and frame of mind. The side effects of Splenda are somewhat akin to the malaise that you described about your husband.
QUOTE: “Splenda” is the commercial name used for sucralose. The manufacturers advertise Splenda as being more “natural” than other sweeteners, as the main substance, sucralose, comes from sugar. This is very misleading though, as it leads consumers to believe that sucralose comes from sugar the same way that cheese comes from milk. The way that sucralose is produced is much more complicated, but to put it simply Splenda is chlorinated sugar (chlorocarbon). Other common chlorocarbons include carbon tetrachloride, and methylene chloride which are all poisonous! Chlorine in numerous studies has been proven as toxic to our bodies and can accumulate in our systems over time.
I HOPE MY RANT HAS HELPED YOU.
