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Struggling. REALLY struggling.

XxTinkerxx

Well-Known Member
Messages
159
Location
London, UK
Type of diabetes
Type 1
Treatment type
Insulin
Dislikes
Rude & condescending people. I will call you out on it.
Hi everyone,

First post on here. Been lurking for a while.

Please accept my apologies for the long post.

I'm a T2 diabetic diagnosed 3 years ago. For the past 3 years I have been struggling go keep my BS in control. Apart from one period of about 6 months where I somehow managed to keep it low with medication (2000mg Metformin. 240mg Gliclazide), my BS is always in double figures.

My body cannot tolerate that amt of tablets so more often that not, I don't take them. I don't have much weight to lose. I am 5'2" and weigh 9st.

For the past 2 months my bg have been between 12 and 25. If I am bring totally honest this is because I am not being anal about what I eat. Everytime i think about being diabetic I get depressed and upset and shove another biscuit or donut down my neck.

I have worked out that my body can't cope with carbs. Even weetabix spikes my blood sugar. In fact, previously when my blood sugar was "under control" i was barely eating anything and when I did I lived on a diet of white fish and vegetables and skipped dinner. Clearly this is not sustainable.

My brain doesn't seem to want to retain anything and my vision has a mind of its own. I am at my wits end.

Sorry for the long woe is me post. I just had to vent somewhere. I just don't know what to do and sometimes I think I would be better off not being alive.
 
Hi, you did the right thing to come to this forum.

Oh dear, there is no reason at al to be anal about food. Eat and enjoy but stay off things like weetabix, bread, pasta, chips etc, all starch and not much use to most diabetics.

I eat a lot of food every day but usually manage to keep BG below 7 at all times. Without meds. I follow the advice from http://www.dietdoctor.com/low-carb so do high fat and it works. My DSN is at a loss as my HbA1c is non-diabetic, she thinks I was misdiagnosed. If I eat anything carby, like bread or rice I'm in the teens so diabetic all right, it just doesn't show on HbA1c as I rarely eat starch or sugar.
 
Thank you for your reply. I will have a look at that site.
 
Welcome, Tinker, you are not alone, loads of people here have been through what you describe.

Your BMI is 23, which means you don't have any weight to lose (the normal weight range is 20-25). So that's good news, right?

I have suffered from depression for many years and at times thought I would be better off not being alive, so I feel I can relate to what you are saying.

What specifically about being diabetic makes you feel depressed and upset?

Is it the thought that you have to have a very restricted diet? Because that's not really true. You can design a diet that is varied and interesting, and satisfying, that also keeps your BG under control. You can even have an occasional biscuit or donut IMO, as long as it's not every day. This forum contains all the info and support you need to design such a diet and stick with it.

Is it the thought that diabetes is progressive and you will end up on insulin with complications? Again, that's not necessarily true, because you can most likely stop diabetes in its tracks by changing what you eat and doing moderate exercise. But if you keep going in this vicious cycle of feeling down and eating high carb foods, then it will be progressive.

Or is it something else? Please tell us and we will try to help.

If you have depression, you may need to get treatment for it. Depression is extremely common in people with diabetes. IMO it's better to get it treated than to let it interfere with your life and keep you stuck in a bad place.

Regarding your meds, are you on slow release metformin? that might reduce the side effects. I don't know anything about gliclazide really, so others may be able to help with that. One option would be to try to just take metformin every day and then see about adding in the gliclazide once you have built up the habit. There may be something you can do about the gliclazide side effects, or there may be another drug you can try. I think it's a good idea to build up to the target dose gradually, if you haven't been taking it for a while. Even 500mg of metformin every day is better for you than a hit and miss approach.

When did you last see your doctor or nurse and have blood and urine tests? We also need an annual foot check and eye test. How about making an appointment for this week? You can ask about slow release metformin, or maybe even going on insulin, if that works better for you than gliclazide. I don't know. If you change your diet and do exercise there is every chance you won't need any of these meds.

Hang in there and let us know how you are doing. You can do this! You just need a helping hand and someone to point you in the right direction.
 
Hi CatLady,

Thank you so much for taking the time to reply. I really appreciate it.

I suppose I get sad and depressed because even when I do feel that I am "doing things by the book" my blood sugar still remains on the high side. I do sit at work all day, but I also play hockey. Though not as often as I should. I find myself getting less and less willing to do anything physical and would rather spend any waking moment in bed.

It sounds weird but I would love to have a hypo. I've not had one in over 2 years.

I am on slow release Metformin and the diabetic nurse told me that taking 500mg a day will have no effect. Subconsciously this has led me to think that unless I take the dose that I am being forced to take (min 1500mg but preferably 2000mg), then there's no point taking it.

Also I am scared of taking them. I took them once without eating and thought I was going to die - I was that sick. I do not have the same problem with Gliclazide. I can take that on an empty stomach and have no problems whatsoever.

I used to regularly attend the diabetic clinic, but I haven't been since Jan this year. I am supposed to go every 3 months.

I don't want to go on Insulin. I don't want to take any medication and I just want to be able to eat food.

I am a bit fussy when it comes to food. I struggle to know what to have for breakfast. Scrambled eggs just don't cut it as I will feel hungry in an hour. When I am "on the wagon" I try to not have carbs in the evening, but my body is always craving carbs. I just don't know what to do.

I don't really want to go back to the diabetic clinic unless it's for my yearly checkup, as I can't see the benefit of it. Everytime I go there I end up feeling sad and cry all the way home.
 
Hello XxTinkerxx and welcome. I used to crave carbs and feel hungry after a big meal, but I swapped carbs for fat and now I feel fine. Sure I fancy fish'n'chips or a doughnut again from time to time but that's not the same thing. As CatLadyNZ says, you aren't overweight, so why not give the LCHF diet a go?
From what you say you've got all the facts you need to deal with your diabetes. You just have to apply them, as we all do. If changing your diet is a key problem for you try reading one of the "what have you eaten today" threads regularly for ideas. I have fun experimenting and I haven't given myself food poisoning, er, yet.
Also I'm taking fewer pills now than I was two years ago, and you might find that with a better diet you will feel better, confidence will return and other health issues fade away.
 
Thanks for replying.

I am looking at the LCHF diet but I'm ignorant to the whole fat thing.

Diabetic nurse said my cholesterol was like 1 above normal and she behaved as though I was going to die of a heart attack the next day.
 
XxTinkerxx said:
Thanks for replying.

I am looking at the LCHF diet but I'm ignorant to the whole fat thing.

Diabetic nurse said my cholesterol was like 1 above normal and she behaved as though I was going to die of a heart attack the next day.
Click to expand...
OK, we can reassure you about your cholesterol when you're ready, and @Totto has given you some reading to do about diet. Take your time and come back with more questions.
 
Hi @XxTinkerxx , welcome

I think you already know the main cause of your high BGs, which is a great start. Yep, cut those carbs and the BGs will follow - you may have some 'cold turkey' response as you cut them out, but believe me it's worth persevering. The cravings will ease and stop (I used to live almost entirely on toast some days!) and eating proper food and full-fat will stop you feeling hungry.

As for cholesterol, a low carb diet improves the components that are crucial (raises HDL and drops triglycerides) - don't worry about the total figure it's fairly meaningless.

Keep going and ask any more questions.
 
Thank you sanguine. I really appreciate your response.

On average how long before the cravings subside? Everything I look at seems like a cupcake. Even as I type on my phone right now it is starting to look like a slice of cake.
 
Do try the LCHF diet. I think so many people have been fed the line that fat is bad for you that it is hard to let go of that but for a Type 2 diabetic I would say fat is a saviour. It means we can cut the carbs but still have treats - fresh fruits and double cream - yum! Crispy streaky bacon with the scrambled egg - yum - add avocadco - even better.

I thought giving up carbs would be impossible. i often lived on toast which I love and happily scoffed sweets and crisps but it has taken less than two weeks for me to feel I can quite happily live without them. I found it easier to literally go cold turkey and cut virtually all carbs completely for a couple of weeks. i never felt hungry as I upped the fat content of my diet and in fact feel fuller than I ever did when i had a high carb diet and am losing weight despite stuffing my face. I'm not taking any meds (I was offered metfomin as a borderline diabetic but decided to try diet an exercise first and have got fasting BG down to non-diabetic levels). The big difference for me was exercising particularly straight after meals. if you eat a high carb meal then go for a walk of at least 15 mins immediately afterwards. it works wonders in lowering any spikes. So if you must have that doughnut then make sure you take a walk afterwards.

If you can manage a walk of 15 mins after each meal that should really help with the BG levels. I'm no doctor but to me it makes sense to get BG levels under control before worrying about cholesterol etc. In fact it is the carbs that turn to fat that seem to be implicated in upping the bad fats in the blood rather than actual fat in the diet so even more important to work on the blood sugar first.

The LCHF diet threads here and the diet doctor site are wonderful and you can see that you can have amazing and very filling food so instead of thinking you are cutting out the things you like think of it as replacing those treats with other high fat low carb treats instead. After a couple of weeks your taste buds definitely change and you will enjoy the low carb lifestyle as much if not more than your current one with the added bonus of feeling so much better and healthier.
 
XxTinkerxx said:
Thanks for replying.

I am looking at the LCHF diet but I'm ignorant to the whole fat thing.

Diabetic nurse said my cholesterol was like 1 above normal and she behaved as though I was going to die of a heart attack the next day.
Click to expand...
The lchf will help bring cholesterol down aswell as give you more energy & better health than stuffing killer simple carbs down. We do still need some complex carbs but portion size is the key.
 
XxTinkerxx said:
Thank you sanguine. I really appreciate your response.

On average how long before the cravings subside? Everything I look at seems like a cupcake. Even as I type on my phone right now it is starting to look like a slice of cake.
Click to expand...
It varies, for some there are none, others may take a few weeks.
 

Wanting to spend any waking moment in bed is potentially a sign of depression, as is feeling sad and crying all the way home from diabetic clinic visits. Depression will make it harder to manage your diabetes. You might want to talk with your GP about treatments for depression, so you have one less thing to battle with.

I suggested 500mg of Metformin as a starting dose while your body gets used to it, to minimise side effects, as that was how it was recommended to me by my GP. It will have "some" effect, just not as much as the target dose. If you tolerate it fine, move up to 1000mg after a week, and 1500mg after another week. Or, if you are able to take 2000mg straight off, that is great. Basically I suggested this approach as being better than taking 2000mg sporadically. I think as your HbA1c comes down, you may well be able to take a lower dose than 2000mg, or even cut it out completely, in consultation with your HCPs. Metformin is meant to be taken with food, as it reduces side effects.

It's really important to attend the diabetic clinic every 3 months until your HbA1c is low enough for you to drop down to 6 monthly then even annual visits instead.

The benefit of going more often than annually is that you have a clearer picture of what is going on inside your body and you can make changes that reduce complications. The worst complications are retinopathy that leads to blindness, kidney failure that leads to dialysis or needing a kidney transplant, and neuropathy, which can lead to getting your legs amputated. But there is a host of complications that are not as bad as these but are still really annoying, inconvenient, and painful. Like recurrent thrush/fungal infections in places like the vagina, mouth, feet, and skin folds, frequent colds that are worse and last longer than normal, stomach and bowel working slower because of nerve damage, blurred vision, thirst, hunger, needing to get up at night to urinate, sexual problems, and worse depression than would otherwise be the case. There is a clear link between regular checkups (3 monthly at first), and avoiding complications.

I think most of us would prefer to not need to take any medication and just be able to eat food. However, this is not the reality, and can only be achieved by changing what we eat so we can get our BGs and HbA1c down.

I think of it like this: at a cellular level, my body does not understand how much I dislike having diabetes. All it understands is that it wants a lower carb higher fat diet to function properly, so there is no point in me feeling down about it or wishing it wasn't so. The only thing my body will respond to is changing what I am fueling it with.

I'm a bit of a fussy eater too. But there are still lots of lower carb higher fat options out there for us fussy eaters If scrambled eggs for breakfast aren't keeping you full enough, add in some higher fat foods like bacon, cream and butter. You could also try high meat content sausages, full fat greek yoghurt, smoothies with ground almonds as a thickener, berries, cheese, ham, and mushrooms. You could also plan out some healthy snack foods to take to work with you.

Your body is craving carbs because you are eating them. If you reduce them, the cravings reduce and often disappear completely. Your body needs a few days and weeks to reset and get used to lower carb higher fat eating.

I think you are caught in a cycle of depression and diabetes feeding each other. Each one can be managed better, and this will have a flow on effect to the other condition. Also, you might want to get blood tests for things like thyroid, and vitamin and mineral deficiencies. You may be lacking in Vitamin B12 and D... which could be contributing to depression and lack of energy.
 
Thank you all once again for your replies and help. I really appreciate it.
 
 
Hi hope you are feeling better there is an article on the site that is called diabetic burnout . Don't know if you have read it it may be of interest . I'm only in week 3 so am new to all this
Clive
 
Thanks Clive. I did see it earlier but need to read it properly.

Welcome to the club! Though like all of us I'm sure you'd rather not be here!
 
I do hope you'll try the low carb diet, as it will both reduce your glucose levels, and also help with your brain issues too. I was reduced over several years (pre diabetes) to a complete zombie like state where I could hardly function at all! Doctor said it was probably due to my my weight (he blamed a lot of things on that!!) but after starting early last year on my LCHF diet this disappeared completely and I can think and act normally again. In this respect diabetes may possibly be the best thing that's happened to me recently! I think you'll find that many type 2s have lost their "brain fog" state through eating this diet. Just avoid all high carbohydrate/starchy/sugary foods, eat plenty of meat, fish, eggs, dairy produce, nuts and oils, and lots of green veggies, and you should begin to see great improvements.

Robbity
 
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