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What happens when enthusiasm falls away.

leslie10152

leslie10152

Well-Known Member
Messages
1,110
Location
Canberra ACT
Type of diabetes
Type 2
Treatment type
Insulin
Dislikes
Ignorance
Where do you go when the zest for living wears thin. When your own family do not understand when you get angry and fed up with being diabetic. Trying to fit your job around your condition, and meet with the attitude, 'it ain't gonna happen'. What do you do? After 12 years....I seriously question the reasons to try anymore. Being there for others was a help. But where is there anything left for me. I am not surrounded by family. What family? I appear to be a burden, where do I go from here?

I am so tired. I give so much to the world, but what is my reward...? I am in exile. Depression is my companion, and I see little to push me forward. NO, I am not fishing for sympathy, I am too intelligent for that!
 
leslie10152 said:
Where do you go when the zest for living wears thin. When your own family do not understand when you get angry and fed up with being diabetic. Trying to fit your job around your condition, and meet with the attitude, 'it ain't gonna happen'. What do you do? After 12 years....I seriously question the reasons to try anymore. Being there for others was a help. But where is there anything left for me. I am not surrounded by family. What family? I appear to be a burden, where do I go from here?

I am so tired. I give so much to the world, but what is my reward...? I am in exile. Depression is my companion, and I see little to push me forward. NO, I am not fishing for sympathy, I am too intelligent for that!
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I have no family of my own. I was married but she left and I stayed alone. The rest of my family have their own families, why do they need me.
 
I'm dropping off the forum for a while, I need some time to get things together. I wish you all good health and long life.
 
@leslie10152
Sorry to hear that you feel so low. It's a shame that your family don't seem to care or understand. Sounds like they are like almost any other person who doesn't have diabetes. Before I became a diabetic I didn't understand what it meant. It was just something fat people suffered from and why should those who self-inflicted this upon themselves deserve any sympathy? How wrong I was.

I've been a diabetic for twelve years and sometimes feel like you do, in that having to inject myself, and monitor my blood and try and keep my body stable, and putting up with hypos and hypers. It's a bloody daily challenge and a pain in the **** (sometimes literally).

But you know what, I say screw those who don't get it (I know enough of them myself). I personally aim to improve myself. I want to become a better version of myself. So not only do I now low carb, which improves that zest but I also yoga.

I damaged my spine way before being a diabetic. I've had surgery on it to try and alleviate the pain (being in a heap on the floor crying in the early hours of the morning isn't something I want to repeat). And though the surgery helped, it didn't get the root cause. That was yogas job.

But yoga has helped in many more ways. And without going all Buddha Zen Dude on you, it makes you calmer, mindful, happier, stronger, fitter and more flexible. I can actually touch my feet after 20 years!!

I want to lose fat (currently 38% eek) get me some abs and be stronger and flexible. That is the reward. Self-improvement. And the more you improve the more that zest comes flowing back :)

Make the reward you seek come from within, because like anything in life it won't come to you (that was some Buddha zen **** right there ;)

All the best, dude.
 
Lord Midas said:
@leslie10152
Sorry to hear that you feel so low. It's a shame that your family don't seem to care or understand. Sounds like they are like almost any other person who doesn't have diabetes. Before I became a diabetic I didn't understand what it meant. It was just something fat people suffered from and why should those who self-inflicted this upon themselves deserve any sympathy? How wrong I was.

I've been a diabetic for twelve years and sometimes feel like you do, in that having to inject myself, and monitor my blood and try and keep my body stable, and putting up with hypos and hypers. It's a bloody daily challenge and a pain in the **** (sometimes literally).

But you know what, I say screw those who don't get it (I know enough of them myself). I personally aim to improve myself. I want to become a better version of myself. So not only do I now low carb, which improves that zest but I also yoga.

I damaged my spine way before being a diabetic. I've had surgery on it to try and alleviate the pain (being in a heap on the floor crying in the early hours of the morning isn't something I want to repeat). And though the surgery helped, it didn't get the root cause. That was yogas job.

But yoga has helped in many more ways. And without going all Buddha Zen Dude on you, it makes you calmer, mindful, happier, stronger, fitter and more flexible. I can actually touch my feet after 20 years!!

I want to lose fat (currently 38% eek) get me some abs and be stronger and flexible. That is the reward. Self-improvement. And the more you improve the more that zest comes flowing back :)

Make the reward you seek come from within, because like anything in life it won't come to you (that was some Buddha zen **** right there ;)

All the best, dude.
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Thank you.
 
Hi Leslie
Please don't leave the forum as we need you as well as you need us.

Tony
 
leslie10152 said:
I have no family of my own. I was married but she left and I stayed alone. The rest of my family have their own families, why do they need me.
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We are your forum family we need you,I haven't interacted with you much as I'm T2 and don't have much if any knowledge of T1 but I always read your posts with interest and think you have a lot of positive things to say and have witnessed posts from you that help others greatly.
 
leslie10152 said:
Where do you go when the zest for living wears thin
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Hello @leslie10152 well first change your perception of what you see, and the way that you are thinking "I know easier said than done my friend,but its possible maybe just start with an hour at a time,yes its difficult, but achievable,but as for being on your own , that suits me in fact there's less hassle,no one to answer to,go where I like and do what I want when I want ,of course I get days like you do everyone does,I just learn to accept my anxiety,and diabetes,most of the time,I do a lot of countryside walking(far from the maddening crowd) just go with however you feel ,there's many times that I want to stand in the toilet bowl and pull the chain but after it has flushed I am still there;)

I could give you all the usual **** about PMA and all that rubbish,as for families they are often overrated believe me ,on my blog there are these few words;)

DON'T TRY TO BE STRONG JUST BE YOURSELF MY FRIEND
REMEMBER IN MY EXPERIENCE THERE ARE ONLY TWO REASONS WHICH CAN SPOIL YOUR DAY .THE FIRST IS YOUR OWN PERCEPTION OF THE DAY THE SECOND IS USUALLY PEOPLE(IT CAN BE A FAMILY MEMBER /A FRIEND OR INDEED A COMPLETE STRANGER, IT ONLY TAKES ONE PERSON TO DO THIS,I SPEND AS MUCH TIME AS I CAN COUNTRY WALKING WHICH IS A SOLITARY PASTIME I INDULGE IN ,JUST THE BIRDS SINGING AND THE GREEN FIELD AND WOODS ITS CALLED NATURE ,WITH MY BEST FRIEND IN THE WORLD MY LITTLE JACK RUSSEL "PENNY' SHE ACCEPTS WHATEVER FRAME OF MIND I AM IN ,IN RETURN ,ALL SHE ASKS OF YOURS TRULY IS SOME FOOD AND LOTS OF TLC,ENJOY YOUR DAY MY FRIENDS AND LOOK AFTER YOURSELVES.
 
Hi @leslie10152 It sounds like this is getting to you, we do get it, living with a health condition can burn you out, but please don't leave the forum, it's a place you can vent your feelings in, somewhere safe where you won't be judged, we are your diabetes family so stay tuned. Yoga is a very good call, as is any form of exercise, get those endorphin's released and tap into something that will give you pleasure, we are around if you need to off load, best wishes J
 
There are times when we get tired of giving out and need some time to recharge ourselves, so take some time, do things that you want to do. A couple of years ago I drew up a list of 'try it for the first time' things that I wanted to try and then set myself a target of how many I could achieve within a year. I didn't make the target but I had fun trying some things that I had not done and may never try again. By the end of the year I had a renewed zest for life and was able to make more long term commitments, starting a new undergraduate course when you haven't written an academic essay for about 20years is a challenge! Next year I am looking to do a follow up course and something else new. Being single you have the opportunity to be supremely selfish, indulge yourself from time to time and meet the rest of the world on your terms. You will find that people respect you for who you are, you will be surprised that your family will miss you, and if they don't then you have built a life of your own with people who do miss you when you are not there. I look forward to seeing you post again. Best wishes.
 
I absolutely agree that the people on this forum are your D Family.
Who else could possibly really get where you are coming from?

So please stay, and please keep posting.
Because believe me when I say that there will be someone else reading your posts who will be feeling exactly the same way, and seeing your words will make them feel less alone too.
 
If it helps I'm exactly at the same point as you except I've not long been diagnosed as a type 1 . Could really do with any tips/advice u may have to share.not used the forum much as I find some of it a bit confusing. If u get spare time spare me a thought
 
As the others confirm we need you but when you get to the dark place it is hard to shake off the black dog and replace what you are feeling with the necessary energy one needs to look the world in the eye and tell it to go fly a kite or whichever term you prefer. Mine will get me deleted for profane lanuage. Give this a try https://www.futurelearn.com/courses/mindfulness-wellbeing-performance . If all else fails just try to imagine the life that must be lead by some of those posting comments - assuming they run along the same lines as the last course. Trying to "mindfully" eat a sultana for 15 minutes certainly had all of us collapsed with laughter

Just keep posting
 
Stay with us leslie10152. We are all here together and we can all help each other.
I may not post much but I read a lot on this forum. It is part of my daily life now, so please stay.

There is a lot of sense in what Lord Midas has posted too.
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