Thanks @gennepher.Happy birthday #5 grandkids... @Lamont D
Mrs L has just been.Been out to merry England (Birkenhead) to meet my friend...where there was a heatwave 22C for half an hour.
Then as I returned to gloomy Wales, the temperature dropped to 12C....
After I unpacked the perishables I went to bed where I fell in a deep sleep...just woke up at quarter to 9 pm...
My friend is getting very very forgetful. And even when I say oh you threw that away 20 years ago, or you did such and such with that item when you moved to your current place, and so on...
'I don't remember', my friend says. Yet, I can remember her telling me all these things, and she used to say oh yeah I can vaguely remember, but now she cannot remember at all when I remind her what she did with the items. She was also forgetting some of the route to where we met. And she had to drive around a bit when she forgot her way.
She's spending all her time 24/7 looking after her cantankerous disabled husband who cannot walk and she has to do literally everything for him. And he is not one bit grateful for what she does for him but constantly puts her down.
I told her she was going downhill because of everything that she was doing for him. When I gave her my views on the matter, it turns out her other friends, neighbours, and daughter have exactly the same solution as I had for her. It's no good driving yourself into the ground, taking care of an ungrateful cantankerous, old, vicious with his lashing tongue invalid, that you become no use even to yourself.
You can guess that I suggested she put him in a home... I also get that the man is scared of his future, but he has got worse and worse over the last ten years...
But my friend is also scared of change, and I explain there is never a right time to do any drastic course of action, except right now...
I need to go and tidy up the kitchen. I still haven't finished filling up my wheelie or the recycle... I shall have to get up early in the morning and finish that...
Night night, sleep tight....
Thanks @JohnEGreenYes Happy birthday to #5 @Lamont D
Yes, I remember passing through checkpoint Charlie as a teenager.I remember going through checkpoint Charlie as a teenager on our way to visit relatives in Poland. It was scary and so was the drive through East Germany. It did feel like an adventure.
We lost our chocolate Labrador Archie last December. He was also the bestest good boy just like your lovely boy RileyGood morning. 5.2 this morning.
Pic of my old pal Riley who left us in March. Bestest goid boy. Hope you all have a great day.View attachment 69995
Yes, it was a disturbing experience @LivingLightly - quite scary but did feel like a huge adventureYes, I remember passing through checkpoint Charlie as a teenager.
I was returning with a school party from a fascinating visit to Russia. I've never forgotten the experience; far more disturbing than anything remotely experienced in USSR.
Wednesday's FBG 4.6 mmol/l on waking at 6.00 am
A care home - but would he go? I am minded of a sister who, as a child, we called Miss Bossy Boots. She would have temper tantrums. Mum would carry her into another room, close the door and leave her to ‘calm down’. I would be minded to close the door, go out and enjoy my day. You can get headsets now to connect to a TV which cuts out all external irritations.Been out to merry England (Birkenhead) to meet my friend...where there was a heatwave 22C for half an hour.
Then as I returned to gloomy Wales, the temperature dropped to 12C....
After I unpacked the perishables I went to bed where I fell in a deep sleep...just woke up at quarter to 9 pm...
My friend is getting very very forgetful. And even when I say oh you threw that away 20 years ago, or you did such and such with that item when you moved to your current place, and so on...
'I don't remember', my friend says. Yet, I can remember her telling me all these things, and she used to say oh yeah I can vaguely remember, but now she cannot remember at all when I remind her what she did with the items. She was also forgetting some of the route to where we met. And she had to drive around a bit when she forgot her way.
She's spending all her time 24/7 looking after her cantankerous disabled husband who cannot walk and she has to do literally everything for him. And he is not one bit grateful for what she does for him but constantly puts her down.
I told her she was going downhill because of everything that she was doing for him. When I gave her my views on the matter, it turns out her other friends, neighbours, and daughter have exactly the same solution as I had for her. It's no good driving yourself into the ground, taking care of an ungrateful cantankerous, old, vicious with his lashing tongue invalid, that you become no use even to yourself.
You can guess that I suggested she put him in a home... I also get that the man is scared of his future, but he has got worse and worse over the last ten years...
But my friend is also scared of change, and I explain there is never a right time to do any drastic course of action, except right now...
I need to go and tidy up the kitchen. I still haven't finished filling up my wheelie or the recycle... I shall have to get up early in the morning and finish that...
Night night, sleep tight....
Life, living can be difficult but you cut through it all with so much kindness. I think that the friend of @gennepher may be in a different situation.Mrs L has just been.
Mrs L asked me why I had come in early from the footie.
I of course told her, that was last night.
I also told her, we were going to footie next week.
Mrs L thought and said, why all the kids came around before?
I Explained it to her.
Did you see the baby (#8)?
Again, explained.
Oh yeah!
it is horrible and most of my day is doing what I have to, to keep my sanity. Cos I just can't let it all slide, even if it hurts. Pain is a reminder, of your age, but Mrs L hurts more.
The confusion, the misunderstanding, the reasoning, the belief that they are out of sync. The constant reminders of their frailty of how they are not able to do things, their independence, their inability to have a life worth living. To do the basics without help.
To feel useless, and dependent on your partner.
It is ............ Awful.
I have nothing but sympathy for your friend.
I am in that situation @gennepher.
And yes around mid afternoon it was summer again, the sun was very bright and warm. I took Mrs L out into the garden, to enjoy the sun for a little while.
Get it while you can!
The temperature is now down to single figures now. Clear skies.
Best wishes
Thanks @ianpspursGood morning from L.A. where my fbg is unknown and General Household waste will be evacuated in due course. @JohnEGreen I hope the weather stays dry and mild for your trip to and from the doctors and all goes well once there. @Lamont D yesterday sounds like a busy but delightful day for you. Hopefully, today will be more leisurely and there may even be some garden time. @gennepher a troubling trip yesterday and a problem for your friend. I do wonder how many other people find themselves in similar situations for purely financial reasons. The attached seems to be at the "cheap" end of what friends and relatives tell me is the going rate for reasonable care. Hugs for those missing loved pets. The excitement never stops here what with evacuations then flu and covid jabs later. Yesterday JKP delved into Snape's potion ingredients. She didn’t actually find the ingredients for Polyjuice potion, but onion powder and powdered Okra combined with short rib of beef and the stock from Sunday's meat and veggies to impersonate an acceptable (low carb) casserole. That is wizardry of the highest order. There was also the first ever acceptable version of cauli mash once cheese and the air fryer had become embroiled in events. In the potions cupboard there were also jars and packets which should never have survived lockdown 1 nor even ever been bought. I'm not naïf enough to expect today to match those heights nor this evening's football to match Sunday’s. The food and football are likely to be very Spursy but I pray y'all enjoy some, or ideally, all of your Thursday. Oh, 32 Days 22 Hours 59 Minutes 55 Seconds. to go at time of posting.
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