The government and the press have gone a little overboard that we are close to a vaccine.
However in my mind, this is not the silver bullet to get us back to normality. What ever normal is, I really don't want it, with brexit and the power grab happening, the restrictions, no workers rights, no sense of what I worked all my life for.
What is causing my doubts?
I will have the jab, so will my wife and father in law who are both shielding, I believe I come into the second group but knowing my doctor because I'm a carer, I will get mine with them.
But, as the majority of people will have the jab, there will be those who won't.
So, if one or more of them are super spreaders, or intentionally spreading the virus, it will still be around. Also if we are still susceptible to the virus despite the jab, after a period, the opening up too early will be awful.
Even with the jab, and I have the flu jab every year, this virus is so prevalent and dangerous, that even with the flu vaccine because of normal, plenty still die of the flu.
How do we know that people we are socialising with or friends, or people in shops, pubs etc, have been given the vaccine?
When will we know it is safe for those shielding to go out again?
When can we travel to see our family? Christmas is huge in my big family and we have three birthdays around Christmas. Then another two in early New Year. Just in the immediate family. Another has his fiftieth mid December. But because of our experience of this virus, we are not having a normal Christmas, we will still need to be able to see them, but only on our phones. We can celebrate when it's all over, if it ever is. The Christmas decorations and trees are up.
How and when can we get away for a break? Being in all the time is awful.
Can this disaster of a government get the process of rolling out the enormous logistical task of getting the vaccine to where it should be at the right time and at the speed where it can have the right effect?
Will the government make the right decision to make sure that the local health authorities be given the task of making decisions about their areas without the interference from Downing Street mafia?
Test, track and trace is acknowledged as the best tools to use to keep the virus in check, and because of those who won't have the vaccine. The government must keep improving the testing, it has been reluctant to do mass testing until recently. It was only because of mass testing has it been found that there are a percentage of those who are asymptomatic with covid. And one of the main reasons why it is so prevalent is because quite lot of people don't realise, especially the young, are not aware of having anything wrong with them.
I still believe we will have at least another couple of lockdown periods as most experts are predicting a third and maybe a fourth wave, as this sort of virus could mutate and be around a lot more than the government is forecasting.
As for the economy versus livelihoods argument. This government will not admit to making it up as we went into the sudden death toll started spiralling out of control.
The amounts of money thrown around because of the absurdity of ten years of austerity, we were not prepared for this, even though the world knew about this in January, our economy will have to change, how can we continue to deprive the unfortunate among us, whilst being in the top ten economic countries. The way the country is run must change and improve the life of everyone not the few.
The virus has been an eye opener to those who have suffered because of the pandemic, and the inequality between the various areas in the country. The north west, north east, Yorkshire, Lancashire and west Midlands have been shown to be discrimination of politics, infrastructure and huge difference in poverty, food banks, redundancy and the amounts of money distribution to these councils.
I am suffering enough with my anxiety, but the logical conclusion to this is we must be prepared to sacrifice our economy, just as our fathers and grandfathers did after the two world wars, we must take an economic crisis and ensure that in the long run, lives are more important. This is a war we can win, but at the cost of thousands of people, is a price we shouldn't have to pay. If the government continues to get its priorities wrong, the actual death toll will be a holocaust.
Think about what it's like to be someone in hospital in a dependency ward, where the staff have too much to do, risking their own personal lives and their families to treat people they don't really know, to have to make judgments on who lives, who dies because believe it or not, this has happened, in my local hospital. The rate of those infected badly went really high, too high, that quite a few had to be transferred to other hospitals and in fact for three hours they didn't have anywhere to send those too ill. At this point they had to call in extra staff, pulled staff away from non covid wards to help, stop emergency operations, cancel appointments.
I know this because all of my children are on the front line, and not been furloughed, three have had the virus, all okay now. One of my grandchildren had it three weeks ago, another was in hospital last week with another infection, the grandchildren have been sent home from school regularly until tested, because other pupils have tested positive. The grandchildren have been made aware of how you should behave with their bubble and their home bubble and to self isolate and learn how to wash hands and wear masks.
It could be you next.
It could be you waiting for an ambulance.
It could be you turned away from hospital or having to travel many miles to a hospital were someone has just died. So you can have their place.
Or the doctors, nurses, ancillary staff are so tired, or ill, stressed or just the wrong day at the wrong time.
This pandemic, has caused a lot of pain and loss, of grief and horror. Actually living under the prospect that you can and probably will lose someone close or your own life, a friend or a neighbour.
I have lost too many such people, I am really scared and anxious about the future, I know that if my wife gets a viral load that will hospitalised her, she won't be coming home. This also applies to two other senior members of my family.
Sorry about the long post.
Keep safe and look after your people.