Feel like I'm back to square one

Tweetypie

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570
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Good morning everyone,
I'm really scared that I might have lost control of my diabetes. After diagnosis in Dec 2011, my HBA1C was 9% and I was put on insulin. The shock was too much for me at first I had a nervous breakdown. However, I fought really hard to change my lifestyle and brought my HBA1C down to 5.7, was able to stop all meds in April 2013. I finally felt that I was able to take control and to a certain extent, felt normal again. But, at Christmas, I fell off the wagon and overindulged, this continued into the New Year. The odd biscuit, chocolate, booze - surely I was normal now, so it couldn't hurt right? Anyway, yesterday, I got my latest HBA1C, which was 6.3 (45 in new terms). I feel like I've totally failed and that I'll never regain control again. I haven't told my partner because I feel like I've failed- and he usually forgets to ask what my results are anyway.

I'm really, really scared that I've lost control - how can I get it back? Where do I start? I've stopped exercising, I'm scared about what I can eat and I'm not sleeping well. I don't even really want to leave the house.

Most importantly, I feel like I've forgotten everything I learnt and I now don't know what to do.

Has anyone else experienced this? Have I ruined everything? I hope someone can offer me some advice please.

Thank you for reading,

Tweetypie
 

Andy12345

Expert
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6,342
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Hi, you can't move forward by looking back, so what has happened before today dosent matter! if you had perfect control yesterday that dosent matter, today is day 1, everyday will be day 1 forever, so start from now!, not in the morning, not after dinner tonight, right now! how did you gain control before? do you test? did you make a food diary? use an ap? theres nothing to forget, how you did it before you can do it again, ok get up out that chair right now! put your shoes on and go for a walk, walk a little bit further than you want to.... right thats exercising successfully completed today, day 1 is going well. have you eaten lunch yet? what will you have? yup something healthy, easy peasy, nothing healthy in the cupboard? ok put those shoes back on and get down the shop and buy a salad with some cold meat, ok so far on day 1 you've exercised twice and eaten a healthy lunch, right what we having for dinner?......i know I'm being an ass, its not hard really, eat nice things that won't kill you, exercise, it dosent have to be a triathlon, just get up, get out and do it, plan your meals and test your bg make food diary and bg diary, take control seriously, don't cheat! take it one day at a time, one hour at a time, be proud of your successes each and every time you achieve it by the smallest thing, each healthy meal, each walk around the block, each nice reading on your meter, each time you say NO to the chocolate bar, be proud of how strong you are!

let us know how day 1 is going.... ill be watching out for your good news :)
 
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VinnyJames

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624
Type of diabetes
Type 2 (in remission!)
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Diet only
6.3 is a pretty good reading!!

Well done. Try to do a bit of exercise as that will keep you calm and stop your mind racing.

Good luck.


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mo1905

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4,334
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+ what Andy said. Also, 6.3 (45) is not totally off the rails. There are many here that struggle to get those numbers. Good luck !
 

VinnyJames

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Messages
624
Type of diabetes
Type 2 (in remission!)
Treatment type
Diet only
Just read this too!!!



i was diagnosed in july last year with HbA1c 10.6%(91mmol) :banghead:

just got report from yesterdays test... its now 6.3%(45).... very pleased and it has certainly made my day.... i am heading in the right direction :happy:


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totsy

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hi,
that isnt a bad number by any means,if you want it to go lower have a think of what has changed diet/exercise wise since your last hba1c, if nothings changed then it could be anything,ive found being in pain highers mine quite a bit, try not to worry too much as this will also higher bloods;)
 
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cath99

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Messages
619
Type of diabetes
Type 2
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rude d/n nurses and being treated like im wierd because im diabetic
my hba was 80 pc in dec my first one . and i know how hard its been but since then i lost 2 stone nd doing well . so your on the better tracks i agree with everyone here start again today its never to late. looking back over xmas wont make it go away but start small today half hr walk you will soon be ready to start again .. good luck xx
 
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Daibell

Master
Messages
12,642
Type of diabetes
LADA
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Insulin
Hi. An HBa1C of 6.3% is pretty good and nothing to worry about. If you can reduce it a bit that would be nice but not vital. I'm guessing but I assume you were overweight at first diagnosis, had very high bloods and was put on insulin to quickly get them back down? By having a low-carb diet and perhaps some tablets such as Metformin if needed you should be able to hold the 6.3% or reduce it. You probably know the good and bad foods for us and there are many good ones such as meat, fish, cheese, veg many fruits and so on. Try to keep biscuits out of the house like I do; they're too temping!
 

Tweetypie

Well-Known Member
Messages
570
Type of diabetes
Other
Treatment type
Diet only
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Spiders, control freaks, untidiness, ignorance.
Hi, you can't move forward by looking back, so what has happened before today dosent matter! if you had perfect control yesterday that dosent matter, today is day 1, everyday will be day 1 forever, so start from now!, not in the morning, not after dinner tonight, right now! how did you gain control before? do you test? did you make a food diary? use an ap? theres nothing to forget, how you did it before you can do it again, ok get up out that chair right now! put your shoes on and go for a walk, walk a little bit further than you want to.... right thats exercising successfully completed today, day 1 is going well. have you eaten lunch yet? what will you have? yup something healthy, easy peasy, nothing healthy in the cupboard? ok put those shoes back on and get down the shop and buy a salad with some cold meat, ok so far on day 1 you've exercised twice and eaten a healthy lunch, right what we having for dinner?......i know I'm being an ass, its not hard really, eat nice things that won't kill you, exercise, it dosent have to be a triathlon, just get up, get out and do it, plan your meals and test your bg make food diary and bg diary, take control seriously, don't cheat! take it one day at a time, one hour at a time, be proud of your successes each and every time you achieve it by the smallest thing, each healthy meal, each walk around the block, each nice reading on your meter, each time you say NO to the chocolate bar, be proud of how strong you are!

let us know how day 1 is going.... ill be watching out for your good news :)
Thank you Andy for those wise words. So, I had a good cry and felt sorry for myself for a bit longer, then yes, I had a healthy soup for my lunch. I was actually sat having my soup when I read your post, so next step is to get out the chair and go for a walk as you say! Actually, breaking it down hour by hour is good advice - I have never really tried this as I always feel I need to get it all sorted at once, thank you. I have also resisted any usual sweet treat so far today...........

Thank you also to the other posters, for reassurance that 6.3 is not that bad. I am seeing the nurse 2morrow, no doubt she will say the same.

Right, I am going to say no to Loose Women today and get out for that walk. Chicken with creamy peppercorn sauce and steamed greens for tea!

Thank you for your replies, it has really helped.

Tweetypie
 
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DiamondAsh

Well-Known Member
Messages
641
Type of diabetes
Type 2
Treatment type
Diet only
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Disregard for authority. Noise.
Hi, you can't move forward by looking back, so what has happened before today dosent matter! if you had perfect control yesterday that dosent matter, today is day 1, everyday will be day 1 forever, so start from now!, not in the morning, not after dinner tonight, right now! how did you gain control before? do you test? did you make a food diary? use an ap? theres nothing to forget, how you did it before you can do it again, ok get up out that chair right now! put your shoes on and go for a walk, walk a little bit further than you want to.... right thats exercising successfully completed today, day 1 is going well. have you eaten lunch yet? what will you have? yup something healthy, easy peasy, nothing healthy in the cupboard? ok put those shoes back on and get down the shop and buy a salad with some cold meat, ok so far on day 1 you've exercised twice and eaten a healthy lunch, right what we having for dinner?......i know I'm being an ass, its not hard really, eat nice things that won't kill you, exercise, it dosent have to be a triathlon, just get up, get out and do it, plan your meals and test your bg make food diary and bg diary, take control seriously, don't cheat! take it one day at a time, one hour at a time, be proud of your successes each and every time you achieve it by the smallest thing, each healthy meal, each walk around the block, each nice reading on your meter, each time you say NO to the chocolate bar, be proud of how strong you are!

let us know how day 1 is going.... ill be watching out for your good news :)
How about that Tweetypie, Andy has a really annoying knack of being able to sum things up in such a unique way. He's made that sound so easy and made it sound fun ! The good thing is, it doesn' need to be any more difficult than that. Sometimes I get to the point where I'm desperately hungry and don't know what to eat. I literally have to stop and think about it and do a bit of math. I usually go for some leafy green stuff in the fridge and some ham, even though I feel like eating porridge, but I know porridge will push my BG up to 10.0 but the proteins won't touch it. Sometimes that's enough to satisfy my hunger. If not I eat again soon after.

I know you are feeling all-at-sea right now but just stand back and take an objective look at it. You can do it. This forum can help you do it!
:rolleyes:
 
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DiamondAsh

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641
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Thank you Andy for those wise words. So, I had a good cry and felt sorry for myself for a bit longer, then yes, I had a healthy soup for my lunch. I was actually sat having my soup when I read your post, so next step is to get out the chair and go for a walk as you say! Actually, breaking it down hour by hour is good advice - I have never really tried this as I always feel I need to get it all sorted at once, thank you. I have also resisted any usual sweet treat so far today...........

Thank you also to the other posters, for reassurance that 6.3 is not that bad. I am seeing the nurse 2morrow, no doubt she will say the same.

Right, I am going to say no to Loose Women today and get out for that walk. Chicken with creamy peppercorn sauce and steamed greens for tea!

Thank you for your replies, it has really helped.

Tweetypie
Well, what'd'ya know. It's working already. WTG !!
 

Disneyfan

Well-Known Member
Messages
60
Type of diabetes
Type 2
Treatment type
Diet only
I know exactly how you feel

I had a hba1c over 100 on diagnosis in April 2012. By October it was 36 and last June 31. I came off 4 metformin and started controlling by diet alone. I was just over 5 stone lighter and felt I was invincible. Now I know the weight has started to creep back ... just my new clothes a little tighter ... not dramatic and I'm getting a few readings I don't want to see (one over 10 the other night after a Nandos) Last October my hba1c was back up to 36 and I'm scared what the 6 monthly reading will be. I seem to have lost direction and control ... :( Even today when I've come in from a days work with a yoghurt for breakfast, chicken salad and an apple for lunch at 12.30 I was 6.5 at 5.30pm hopefully we can both find the solution!
 

Tweetypie

Well-Known Member
Messages
570
Type of diabetes
Other
Treatment type
Diet only
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Spiders, control freaks, untidiness, ignorance.
I am also
I'm happy with my 6.3% :) it has given me new energy and motivation...


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I know exactly how you feel

I had a hba1c over 100 on diagnosis in April 2012. By October it was 36 and last June 31. I came off 4 metformin and started controlling by diet alone. I was just over 5 stone lighter and felt I was invincible. Now I know the weight has started to creep back ... just my new clothes a little tighter ... not dramatic and I'm getting a few readings I don't want to see (one over 10 the other night after a Nandos) Last October my hba1c was back up to 36 and I'm scared what the 6 monthly reading will be. I seem to have lost direction and control ... :( Even today when I've come in from a days work with a yoghurt for breakfast, chicken salad and an apple for lunch at 12.30 I was 6.5 at 5.30pm hopefully we can both find the solution!
Hi Disneyfan, Thanks for sharing your story too. I found out this morning at my review that I had put on a stone. Don't despair, I think from 100 to 36 is remarkable - well done. As you may have seen my other post, I am anxious to get back on track, but it may take a little while. It doesn't happen overnight. What sort of yoghurt did you have? Was it low carb? My be the apple spiked you later on - fruits can cause different reactions...........I can only really eat berries. Or you could just be having an off day/s. 36 is brilliant -hope I can get down to that!

Best of luck
Tweety
 
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Disneyfan

Well-Known Member
Messages
60
Type of diabetes
Type 2
Treatment type
Diet only
Thank you for the encouragement Tweety - here's hoping we can both get back on track. Last winter when I was losing weight etc my staple diet was a 10g carb youghurt for breakfast, salad and an apple snack pack for lunch and something low carb for tea. Hopefully if I go back to that I'll be ok. If I can keep under 40 I'll be happy :)