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How to say no to sweet treats

Tweetypie

Tweetypie

Well-Known Member
Me again...........

So, I'm having a friend over for coffee this weekend. I have not known this person long and I feel it's too soon (if even at all necessary) to say I am diabetic. But, excitedly, in our telephone chat, she adds "ooh, I'll bring cakes!". To which I cringe, knowing I really cannot have one. Now, while I might indulge in a cream cake very occasionally, I am confused about refusing and as to what to say and how to say it. How do others deal with these impromptu indulgent offerings without necessarily declaring your medical situation and without seeming ungrateful?

I will add that this is not a problem I have with declining cake, I can take it or leave it - it's just to do with explaining myself without actually telling someone I am diabetic. I am not ashamed or embaressed of being diabetic, but I just don't want it to be something that I tell someone I hardly know- I want them to get to know me first, not my medical situation.

Thanks...........
 
I don't have an answer to this one I'm afraid. I usually either eat the cake which I don't really want or end up having to explain why I don't want it. If anyone can give a better solution, I too would be very interested
 
For some reason I find that if I tell people I am diabetic and can't eat cakes they seem to want to tell me I can. I then end up having a long discussion that I don't actually want to have - all over a cake.
Now I just say "So sorry, the cakes look wonderful but I am YEAST intolerant and it makes me feel so unwell that I would rather not eat them." It is funny but no one ever seems to question it! It also means that it is a get out clause for sandwiches, biscuits etc...
 
I just tell the truth.
Education is what's needed with regards to diabetes, I look at it as my opportunity to explain what I have and what it's all about :)
If they're a proper friend then it won't be an issue!
I usually say "oh I've not long done an injection, eating that will mean I have to do another one" simples :)
Best of luck! I think the main thing is to have a good time with your friend and not to worry about a little bit of cake :)

Have a good time!

Indiana x
 
I dont understand why you wouldnt tell them? Being diabetic is a huge part of you and something I've personally never hidden away (couldnt and wouldnt). Wouldnt it be better to say thanks for the cake, do you mind if I have it later? I cant really snack between meals as im diabetic. > this could easily lead to a converstaion where you could educate your friend about diabeties and become closer friends afterwards.
 
The other thing is, that if this 'newish' friend becomes a regular friend, you have begun on the wrong foot. Tell her before she finds out later, honesty is the best policy. You don't want her feeling silly. Why don't you make/bake your own cakes and goodies.
 
I dislike telling people that I am diabetic, unless they are really close friends. I am afraid that it (Type 2 Diabetes) still has a huge stigma 'out there', where, even well meaning friends and colleagues, start to label you into the 'fat, stupid and serves you right' category. As the Daily Mail says 'it is a lifestyle choice and that we all deserve it'. This attitude really makes me angry, and so to avoid any awkward conversations where I have to challenge their small minded prejudices, I usually tell them that I am on a strict diet (despite being thin!).
 
Hawkeye said:
I dislike telling people that I am diabetic, unless they are really close friends. I am afraid that it (Type 2 Diabetes) still has a huge stigma 'out there', where, even well meaning friends and colleagues, start to label you into the 'fat, stupid and serves you right' category. As the Daily Mail says 'it is a lifestyle choice and that we all deserve it'. This attitude really makes me angry, and so to avoid any awkward conversations where I have to challenge their small minded prejudices, I usually tell them that I am on a strict diet (despite being thin!).
Click to expand...

Don't you find that makes them want to tempt you more? Years ago I told 'friends' I was on a diet ...and got 3 boxes of chocolates for Christmas. Funny...I haven't seen any of them for years.
 
Tweetypie said:
Me again...........

So, I'm having a friend over for coffee this weekend. I have not known this person long and I feel it's too soon (if even at all necessary) to say I am diabetic. But, excitedly, in our telephone chat, she adds "ooh, I'll bring cakes!". To which I cringe, knowing I really cannot have one. Now, while I might indulge in a cream cake very occasionally, I am confused about refusing and as to what to say and how to say it. How do others deal with these impromptu indulgent offerings without necessarily declaring your medical situation and without seeming ungrateful?

I will add that this is not a problem I have with declining cake, I can take it or leave it - it's just to do with explaining myself without actually telling someone I am diabetic. I am not ashamed or embaressed of being diabetic, but I just don't want it to be something that I tell someone I hardly know- I want them to get to know me first, not my medical situation.

Thanks...........
Click to expand...
HI DON'T MENTION HEALTH STUFF,JUST MAKE HER A CUP OF COFFEE,AND ENJOY THE THE COMPANY,THE WEATHER IS
ANOTHER TOPIC TO AVOID.HAVE FUN RICHARD
 
How about 'I have sensitive teeth and sweet and cold things make me wince'

I can understand why you don't want to tell. I'm a private person and I think people curiosity should stop outside my body.

Cara
 
It's a pain. "Oh, go on, you don't need to diet - you need to put weight ON". (nope)

I guess that true friends would respect your decision and just continue with the discussion in hand. Why do some people make a fuss over cake/biscuits/chocs? We are all allowed to have preferences and who wants to eat cake every day ... :stop:

No-one should have to discuss their medical history with each new acquaintance!

Hiss and spit. :cat::cat:
 
I should clarify, I only tell and lecture people if they want to know why I eat what I eat, or start offering unwanted advice/comments, or make general adverse comments about diabetics. I have not yet resorted to running up to strangers in the street and yelling "I'm diabetic and proud" in their faces ( although I might buy the T shirt)


Sent from the Diabetes Forum App
 
I just say no thankyou and then get oh well i know a diabetic who eats what they want lol cant win sometimes
 
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