Going on about diabetes too much

[Jaylee]

For me it goes like this..

Some bar in Germany. "Vould you like a beer?" "Thanks. But I'd rather have a Coke light." (It's the same a diet in Eroupe.) "A COKE LIGHT! Are you GAY??!" I then nod & say how did you guess....

Unless I'm going into A&E? Who needs to know.. They certainly won't question & make wrong assumptions about my orientation, based on any dietary requirements..!

 

[Daibell]

I'm slightly surprised by many of the posts on this thread where friends and family aren't aware. I might understand this when on just diet/tablets but when on insulin it is difficult to avoid friends and family knowing. I often inject at the restaurant table and if the people present aren't aware of me needing to inject and might see then I will quietly ask 'if it's OK'. I will let first-aiders know in my employment or volunteering and also close family in case of hypos. I will try influence anyone who is still on the low-fat/carbs are OK regime if I think they might be receptive and are perhaps overweight and at risk of T2. I try not be a bore. More importantly I don't look for sympathy. Being on insulin is dead easy for me and manages the diabetes. There are so many other diseases and illnesses that can't be easily controlled whereas diabetes can be. So, I consider myself lucky that I have a manageable illness and not cancer or whatever that too many friends have had.

 

[MikeZ]

I've found that the real life people that I know, that also have diabetes, deal with their health differently than I do. They think I am overly cautious with my diet and overly ambitious with my exercise. I think it's their way of excusing their own, (dare I say?), excesses. I really don't much care what they do but it bothers me when they scoff at what I do. I never bring it up with non-diabetics at all. I doubt that they would be interested or have much insight. In the end it's not a subject that comes up much outside of my immediate family. And I prefer it that way.

Its worth mentioning that I don't know how I would be dealing with the subject were it not for this forum. Having so much information and common ground makes it easy for me to NOT have to discuss it with my "real life" friends and/or colleagues. I can't imagine having to rely solely on the doctor's opinion. So, I guess now is a good time to thank you all that make this place what it is. Thanks!

 

[Diamattic]

Even when family members know you have diabetes, they still don't really care. They care about you, but they usually aren't going to take as much time out of their day to learn all about it like you did, and sometimes when they do its just as annoying because they constantly second guess what you are doing! lol

To be honest I am happiest whenever everyone around just ignores it. Asking questions really only puts you on the spot, and honestly why are you asking me? Are you going to go home and look deeper into it, because there is no way i can explain it all right now, so i don't see why bother.

"Oh you are a pilot, so you fly airplanes?"
"Yep"
"Thats cool, how does that work?"
"....Are you asking me to describe to you how airplanes work!?"

The exchange is essentially that.

It's something that comes up if I'm not careful. As posted above - When going out for drinks, I'll usually order a diet coke, and get a similar response. My first reaction is to say "Nope, I am diabetic" (which is weird, because even before i was T1D i only ever ordered diet coke anyway... I should think on this lol) And thats how it comes up. Or when you get a coffee and someone puts sugar in it...
Usually little things where the correct reason for rejecting their proposal is diabetes related, sometimes if one is not careful, they mention the D word lol

 

[awaysworkin]

I've found that the majority of the family have been very interested at the start, now just want to know that I am 'well' and 'coping' without any great detail. The exception being my daughter who is keen to learn as much as she can, so if I am unwell she is 'on the ball' to assist. My better half has found it too much, and asked that I don't mention it again! But there you go, everyone is different.
Folk at work were intrigued at first, but as it isn't like you have two heads, they soon forget and it's rarely mentioned now. Those friends I see infrequently tend to be those who ask as soon as they speak to me, but even they really don't want to know if you're unwell!

If you want to sound off about your condition, or chat openly without feeling you're overloading someone - come on here and talk to us all!

 

[Catsymoo]

I feel this way a lot. I try not to talk about it, but as much as we don't like to admit that it changes our lives, it does. When I got diagnosed, I researched the condition relentlessly, and I talked about it a lot to my mum. Eventually she pushed me away because she was fed up of hearing about it. Even now, when I try and tell her some things about the condition, I can see her eyes rolling.

I find it pops up in conversation a lot at work. I try to be positive about it. I never moan about it, but sometimes I'll say "oh I had a bad low this morning so I don't feel so great today" if somebody asks if I'm okay. And sometimes if someone is talking to me about a high GI food that doesn't agree with me, I'll mention I avoid it because of the carb content (chips for example despite being on insulin just cause major spikes for me).

The thing that annoys me is when someone brings sweets or cakes into work and I'll have one, and some co-workers give their input. "you're diabetic! you shouldn't be having that!" I try to educate people in as few words as possible that it is about CARBS, not sugar. And explain some of the difficulties we all experience, despite motivation to not let it hinder us. But it does. And we just have to accept it. Testing and injecting is the easy part, self-control and educating yourself is the hard part. There are so so so many things that effect us and nobody knows about it. I do believe the world needs to be more informed other than the stigma of "yeah fatty just cut out jelly babies and thats it."

 

[ConradJ]

I am not a diabetic.
I have diabetes.
I have a friend he's not a cancer he has cancer.

Thanks for that simple analogy @JTL

I was (and often still am) "a diabetic" , but not because I had an issue with it (at least on the outside), so could not understand the irate stance of some who would complain about the title.

From now on, however, I shall be someone with (T1) diabetes.

 

[Ilana]

For me it goes like this..

Some bar in Germany. "Vould you like a beer?" "Thanks. But I'd rather have a Coke light." (It's the same a diet in Eroupe.) "A COKE LIGHT! Are you GAY??!" I then nod & say how did you guess....

Unless I'm going into A&E? Who needs to know.. They certainly won't question & make wrong assumptions about my orientation, based on any dietary requirements..!

How is having light gay?! or was that your point?

 

[Ilana]

Thanks for that simple analogy @JTL

I was (and often still am) "a diabetic" , but not because I had an issue with it (at least on the outside), so could not understand the irate stance of some who would complain about the title.

From now on, however, I shall be someone with (T1) diabetes.

What people call me doesn't really bother me. Just because I'm diabetic, it doesn't mean that I can't simultaneously be anything else, being diabetic isn't mutually exclusive to being anything else

 

[Ilana]

I feel this way a lot. I try not to talk about it, but as much as we don't like to admit that it changes our lives, it does. When I got diagnosed, I researched the condition relentlessly, and I talked about it a lot to my mum. Eventually she pushed me away because she was fed up of hearing about it. Even now, when I try and tell her some things about the condition, I can see her eyes rolling.

I find it pops up in conversation a lot at work. I try to be positive about it. I never moan about it, but sometimes I'll say "oh I had a bad low this morning so I don't feel so great today" if somebody asks if I'm okay. And sometimes if someone is talking to me about a high GI food that doesn't agree with me, I'll mention I avoid it because of the carb content (chips for example despite being on insulin just cause major spikes for me).

The thing that annoys me is when someone brings sweets or cakes into work and I'll have one, and some co-workers give their input. "you're diabetic! you shouldn't be having that!" I try to educate people in as few words as possible that it is about CARBS, not sugar. And explain some of the difficulties we all experience, despite motivation to not let it hinder us. But it does. And we just have to accept it. Testing and injecting is the easy part, self-control and educating yourself is the hard part. There are so so so many things that effect us and nobody knows about it. I do believe the world needs to be more informed other than the stigma of "yeah fatty just cut out jelly babies and thats it."

Wow well said! There should be more information about it at schools, there is a lot of ignorance, I hardly knew anything about it myself until I was diagnosed!

 

[Ilana]

I've found that the majority of the family have been very interested at the start, now just want to know that I am 'well' and 'coping' without any great detail. The exception being my daughter who is keen to learn as much as she can, so if I am unwell she is 'on the ball' to assist. My better half has found it too much, and asked that I don't mention it again! But there you go, everyone is different.
Folk at work were intrigued at first, but as it isn't like you have two heads, they soon forget and it's rarely mentioned now. Those friends I see infrequently tend to be those who ask as soon as they speak to me, but even they really don't want to know if you're unwell!

If you want to sound off about your condition, or chat openly without feeling you're overloading someone - come on here and talk to us all!

Aww that's sweet of your daughter! I tested my dad's blood sugar when he got some results from a general medical test back so I actually diagnosed him (with T2, not T1 like me) before the doctor! Thank you, I like a good vent sometimes

 

[ConradJ]

I'm slightly surprised by many of the posts on this thread where friends and family aren't aware. I might understand this when on just diet/tablets but when on insulin it is difficult to avoid friends and family knowing. I often inject at the restaurant table and if the people present aren't aware of me needing to inject and might see then I will quietly ask 'if it's OK'. I will let first-aiders know in my employment or volunteering and also close family in case of hypos. I will try influence anyone who is still on the low-fat/carbs are OK regime if I think they might be receptive and are perhaps overweight and at risk of T2. I try not be a bore. More importantly I don't look for sympathy. Being on insulin is dead easy for me and manages the diabetes. There are so many other diseases and illnesses that can't be easily controlled whereas diabetes can be. So, I consider myself lucky that I have a manageable illness and not cancer or whatever that too many friends have had.

I'm not surprised at all, just saddened that so many of us have had to live with a condition that affects everything we do, and the simple life-sustaining act of what we can eat and drink whilst those immediately around us prefer to just switch off or glaze over or roll their eyes, etc. etc.

But I guess that's a great part of the ignorance of this condition: if you have no other issues, people look at you and say: "there's nothing wrong with you" or even - to quote one member on here - "you're not ill, you have diabetes".

Well, and I suppose this is my take on it, I am ill and I live with a chronic, life-threatening, metabolic-condition that has prevented me from pursuing a variety of career ambitions as well led to the development of complications owing to a gross misunderstanding of diabetes, diet and exercise (that I am now redressing - mostly thanks to this site and the many members on board).

To be quite frank, much of my hard time with diabetes links intrinsically with an unstable childhood and lack of family engagement and support with it, so it is with that experience in mind that I cannot stress the importance of 'loving' family and partners to get involved and share some of the journey with the diagnosed; if it weren't for the love and strength of support I've had from my wife I'd have probably died of dka or hypo-induced heart failure a fair few years ago.

I do agree with sentiments that we should not bore / overdo it, but I also feel that parents and partners particularly should take much greater interest than it seems many do; diabetes may not be cancer, but the long-term effects of poor control can be as insidious and debilitating as many types of that disease.

 

[Ilana]

Even when family members know you have diabetes, they still don't really care. They care about you, but they usually aren't going to take as much time out of their day to learn all about it like you did, and sometimes when they do its just as annoying because they constantly second guess what you are doing! lol

To be honest I am happiest whenever everyone around just ignores it. Asking questions really only puts you on the spot, and honestly why are you asking me? Are you going to go home and look deeper into it, because there is no way i can explain it all right now, so i don't see why bother.

"Oh you are a pilot, so you fly airplanes?"
"Yep"
"Thats cool, how does that work?"
"....Are you asking me to describe to you how airplanes work!?"

The exchange is essentially that.

It's something that comes up if I'm not careful. As posted above - When going out for drinks, I'll usually order a diet coke, and get a similar response. My first reaction is to say "Nope, I am diabetic" (which is weird, because even before i was T1D i only ever ordered diet coke anyway... I should think on this lol) And thats how it comes up. Or when you get a coffee and someone puts sugar in it...
Usually little things where the correct reason for rejecting their proposal is diabetes related, sometimes if one is not careful, they mention the D word lol

The D word haha my family second guess me too and I'm like "but it's my body, I know best!" My auntie borrowed a copy of balance magazine for diabetics but she just ended up skipping the technical stuff and looked at the recipes. I get what you mean about family caring if you're ok but then not caring why/how you're ok too

 

[Jaylee]

How is having light gay?! or was that your point?

Lol
I would rather they made that assumption & draw a line under it. Than explain Diabetes to someone who's fist language isn't English... Well, until they met my wife.!

 

[Ilana]

I'm slightly surprised by many of the posts on this thread where friends and family aren't aware. I might understand this when on just diet/tablets but when on insulin it is difficult to avoid friends and family knowing. I often inject at the restaurant table and if the people present aren't aware of me needing to inject and might see then I will quietly ask 'if it's OK'. I will let first-aiders know in my employment or volunteering and also close family in case of hypos. I will try influence anyone who is still on the low-fat/carbs are OK regime if I think they might be receptive and are perhaps overweight and at risk of T2. I try not be a bore. More importantly I don't look for sympathy. Being on insulin is dead easy for me and manages the diabetes. There are so many other diseases and illnesses that can't be easily controlled whereas diabetes can be. So, I consider myself lucky that I have a manageable illness and not cancer or whatever that too many friends have had.

I wouldn't say it is easily manged though, it took me along time to get to grips with the right amount of each insulin and tablet and I still haven't got exercise sorted out. It's still a faff with prescriptions and all the doctors appointments even though there are worse illnesses.

 

[Ilana]

Lol
I would rather they made that assumption & draw a line under it. Than explain Diabetes to someone who's fist language isn't English... Well, until they met my wife.!

Until they meet your wife who checks that you have taken your blood sugar

 

[Ilana]

I'm not surprised at all, just saddened that so many of us have had to live with a condition that affects everything we do, and the simple life-sustaining act of what we can eat and drink whilst those immediately around us prefer to just switch off or glaze over or roll their eyes, etc. etc.

But I guess that's a great part of the ignorance of this condition: if you have no other issues, people look at you and say: "there's nothing wrong with you" or even - to quote one member on here - "you're not ill, you have diabetes".

Well, and I suppose this is my take on it, I am ill and I live with a chronic, life-threatening, metabolic-condition that has prevented me from pursuing a variety of career ambitions as well led to the development of complications owing to a gross misunderstanding of diabetes, diet and exercise (that I am now redressing - mostly thanks to this site and the many members on board).

To be quite frank, much of my hard time with diabetes links intrinsically with an unstable childhood and lack of family engagement and support with it, so it is with that experience in mind that I cannot stress the importance of 'loving' family and partners to get involved and share some of the journey with the diagnosed; if it weren't for the love and strength of support I've had from my wife I'd have probably died of dka or hypo-induced heart failure a fair few years ago.

I do agree with sentiments that we should not bore / overdo it, but I also feel that parents and partners particularly should take much greater interest than it seems many do; diabetes may not be cancer, but the long-term effects of poor control can be as insidious and debilitating as many types of that disease.

I agree with you completely, I feel like my friends need to understand the problems I go through, including the ones of being a diabetic, to see who I am accurately

 

[ConradJ]

I think a lot of people just see me test and inject at school once a day and think that that's all there is to it.

And ain't that the thing!

The funny thing is when I was at 'skool' many friends were so interested to know what it was like to inject and 'prick my finger' that I bought a pack of 10 'plastipak' syringes (the oldies will remember those - and the fact that we had to buy them until 1985) from my local chemist so that they could all sample the delights themselves!

Needless to say, I went up in their esteem after that.

Perhaps you should offer to give them all a freebie @Ilana! (Do use new needles / lancets for each one ... and sharps bin them afterwards!)

 

[Ilana]

And ain't that the thing!

The funny thing is when I was at 'skool' many friends were so interested to know what it was like to inject and 'prick my finger' that I bought a pack of 10 'plastipak' syringes (the oldies will remember those - and the fact that we had to buy them until 1985) from my local chemist so that they could all sample the delights themselves!

Needless to say, I went up in their esteem after that.

Perhaps you should offer to give them all a freebie @Ilana! (Do use new needles / lancets for each one ... and sharps bin them afterwards!)

Hahaha I've left school now but I'll try it on my friends although I have a feeling they'll be too whimpy to try it How old are you, if you don't mind me asking?

 

[Jaylee]

Until they meet your wife who checks that you have taken your blood sugar

Since diagnosis at the age of 8. I have been souly responsible for my own "care package."

I don't remember my bride mentioning anything about diabetes in the vows...