"Best" things doctors have said to you

[Jacquelineann]

I was 13 when diagnosed in 1981 and I was admitted to hospital and was in there for 2 weeks being stabilised.

I was due to be discharged awaiting a final meeting with a Dr and when he came with his "entourage" this brief but ridiculous interaction took place

(This is what I remember!)

Dr - So then Bernard, we were going to discharge you today but we are going to keep you in for a few more days as we are not happy with your sugar levels.

Me - I'm not Bernard

Dr - Sorry !

Me - I'm not Bernard

Dr - Who are you ?

Me - I'm Kevin

Dr - Your not Bernard Fitzpatrick !

Me - No I'm Kevin Fitzgerald

Dr - Your notes say your Bernard Fitzpatrick

Me - I'm not Bernard Fitzpatrick I'm Kevin Fitzgerald

Dr - Nurse can you confirm this

Nurse - Yes this is Kevin Fitzgerald

Dr - I think I've got the wrong notes !

 

[Jacquelineann]

It really doesn't inspire confidence does it?

 

[Jacquelineann]

Yeah it still makes me laugh but it's quite scary when you think about it !

Dare we ask how Bernard is after all these years?

 

[kevinfitzgerald]

Dare we ask how Bernard is after all these years?

Well from what I remember of Bernard his family kept visiting him in hospital and bringing him mars bars and coco cola and he was eating and drinking this stuff. The nurses were always having a go at his family trying their best to explain that they mustn't do this (they just didn't get it!)

He was in there long before I was even admitted and he was discharged a couple of days prior to my conversation with the consultant. It seems he may have been discharged as they thought he was me and I was in hospital longer than I should have been as thought I was him !

Scary !

 

[Lamont D]

My new named doctor in response to high blood glucose levels after eating porridge in 2009.

"You are type 2 diabetic!"


I know this isn't about doctors, but every time I go for an OGTT test, I get told by any staff, I must have glucose in response to a hypo!

I know that it is very different from diabetics, but at least they should ask the patient about how and why before they trot out the usual 'read from the script' answer.

 

[Jacquelineann]

Well from what I remember of Bernard his family kept visiting him in hospital and bringing him mars bars and coco cola and he was eating and drinking this stuff. The nurses were always having a go at his family trying their best to explain that they mustn't do this (they just didn't get it!)

He was in there long before I was even admitted and he was discharged a couple of days prior to my conversation with the consultant. It seems he may have been discharged as they thought he was me and I was in hospital longer than I should have been as thought I was him !

Scary !

Maybe his family went on to be medics specialising in diabetes!

 

[margaret1971]

dwp are worse at an interview I was asked when my diabetics would be cured and could I not get food for my illness on prescription as the lady before me was suffering with Cealiac disease and got her food on presciption!!!!!!

 

[Robinredbreast]

I'm sorry.................... but are you sure you are not Bernard.......................... ?

 

[Robinredbreast]

dwp are worse at an interview I was asked when my diabetics would be cured and could I not get food for my illness on prescription as the lady before me was suffering with Cealiac disease and got her food on presciption!!!!!!

Lol, I have both, I wonder what response I would of got

 

[kesun]

Dr - Your not Bernard Fitzpatrick !

Me - No I'm Kevin Fitzgerald !

I had a similar experience in A&E as a teenager when the doctor came in and said "Pat? We need to prep you for surgery"
Me: I'm not Pat, I'm Kate.
Nurse: Um, Doctor, I think Pat's the stabbing in the next cubicle.
Dr: Oh, sorry, wrong bed.

Later I peeped into the next cubicle. Not only was Pat several decades older than me, but Pat was clearly short for Patrick.

There's a great deal to be said for reading the notes before speaking to the patient.

Kate

 

[himtoo]

this is a brilliant thread -- hilarious and sad all at the same time
here's mine


at endocrinology dept 6 monthly appointment and got a registrar i had never seen before
i always shake hand and look them in the eye as I am sitting down........

me good afternoon doctor

him so just looking at your notes i don't think you are diabetic anymore

me Really ?

him well your latest A1c is 39 ( 5.7% in old money)

me I didn't think there was a cure for type 1 and i have had it 41 years and i needed my insulin this morning

him Oh

 

[Gezzabelle]

Doctor....You re diabetic...
Me...what do I have to do now?
Doctor...go home and eat broccoli and have a glass of wine !!!
I kid you not....!!!!

 

[kevinfitzgerald]

I had a similar experience in A&E as a teenager when the doctor came in and said "Pat? We need to prep you for surgery"
Me: I'm not Pat, I'm Kate.
Nurse: Um, Doctor, I think Pat's the stabbing in the next cubicle.
Dr: Oh, sorry, wrong bed.

Later I peeped into the next cubicle. Not only was Pat several decades older than me, but Pat was clearly short for Patrick.

There's a great deal to be said for reading the notes before speaking to the patient.

Kate

Absolutely Susan !

Sorry Kate, read the wrong post !

I think yours is as bad as mine. Mind you at least Bernard was a bloke ha ha........

 

[kevinfitzgerald]

Doctor....You re diabetic...
Me...what do I have to do now?
Doctor...go home and eat broccoli and have a glass of wine !!!
I kid you not....!!!!

That one is sweet !

 

[ray2]

Me at doctors following fasting blood test and HbA1C;

Doctor: O dear...your fasting test seems a little high mmmmm it's over 11...I'm sorry to have to say i think you might be diabetic !
Me: Well yes I was diagnosed 5 years ago
Doctor: you have good control ...keep doing what you are doing.
Me: (totally speechless)

 

[Gezzabelle]

Omg.....scary posts here but have to admit I am laughing my socks off at some of them

 

[SandieB]

Long before I was diagnosed with T2, I went to the quack to review my prescription for thyroxine.

quack...what can I do for you today?
me...I need a prescription for my thyroid tablets
quack...and why would I do that?
me....because I'm hypothyroid and you've been prescribing them for the last 10 years!

 

[Ladybirdy75]

I was 13 when diagnosed in 1981 and I was admitted to hospital and was in there for 2 weeks being stabilised.

I was due to be discharged awaiting a final meeting with a Dr and when he came with his "entourage" this brief but ridiculous interaction took place

(This is what I remember!)

Dr - So then Bernard, we were going to discharge you today but we are going to keep you in for a few more days as we are not happy with your sugar levels.

Me - I'm not Bernard

Dr - Sorry !

Me - I'm not Bernard

Dr - Who are you ?

Me - I'm Kevin

Dr - Your not Bernard Fitzpatrick !

Me - No I'm Kevin Fitzgerald

Dr - Your notes say your Bernard Fitzpatrick

Me - I'm not Bernard Fitzpatrick I'm Kevin Fitzgerald

Dr - Nurse can you confirm this

Nurse - Yes this is Kevin Fitzgerald

Dr - I think I've got the wrong notes !

Crying

 

[Gezzabelle]

Long before I was diagnosed with T2, I went to the quack to review my prescription for thyroxine.

quack...what can I do for you today?
me...I need a prescription for my thyroid tablets
quack...and why would I do that?
me....because I'm hypothyroid and you've been prescribing them for the last 10 years!

Lmao....are all of these doctors total quacks????

 

[Gezzabelle]

This thread is better than Prozac for cheering me up.....haven't laughed this much in ages