Alone

[jasmine1616]

I need to rant about something. It's probably going to go all over the place and it might not make sense in places, but try to stick with me.

Do you ever just feel so alone because of your diabetes? I feel so awkward whenever I'm with my friends if we go out to eat or something. They'll just start eating and I have to check my glucose. Does anyone else feel like this or is it just me. I feel like I don't fit in at school either. I feel so out of place, like I don't belong anywhere. Sometimes I wish diabetes would just go away. I know that it's not going to, but I wish it would. I feel like no one understands me. My best friend tries to understand, but I know that no matter how hard she tries, she just won't understand. Whoever I try and explain myself to, they aren't going to understand. And I'm just going through the same things over and over again. Check glucose, eat, high glucose, cover, low glucose, eat, high glucose cover. I just feel trapped, like my life is a giant circle and I'm not going anywhere. I'm just stuck. Can someone help me end this cycle?

 

[Juicyj]

Hi @jasmine1616 It sounds to me like you are feeling a bit burnt out.. It's very often hard to differentiate between the feelings created from having diabetes and the relentlessness of the testing, injecting, thinking about it which can be consuming and how you would be feeling generally if you didn't have it - have you spoken to your DSN about how you are feeling as they may be able to help with a CGM to take some of the effort out of it for you ? It's great that your friend is willing to understand, that's important and you've got a good friend there, I know she doesn't take it home with her and live with it, but it's great having a willing friend who's prepared to listen.

Ultimately it's not going away so finding a way to manage the feelings associated with it and coping better, then hopefully a CGM will help as well as having a chat with your DSN. Another thought is to try contacting JDRF and seeing if you can go to an organised event near you where you can meet other t1's

 

[Sibyl]

I need to rant about something. It's probably going to go all over the place and it might not make sense in places, but try to stick with me.

Do you ever just feel so alone because of your diabetes? I feel so awkward whenever I'm with my friends if we go out to eat or something. They'll just start eating and I have to check my glucose. Does anyone else feel like this or is it just me. I feel like I don't fit in at school either. I feel so out of place, like I don't belong anywhere. Sometimes I wish diabetes would just go away. I know that it's not going to, but I wish it would. I feel like no one understands me. My best friend tries to understand, but I know that no matter how hard she tries, she just won't understand. Whoever I try and explain myself to, they aren't going to understand. And I'm just going through the same things over and over again. Check glucose, eat, high glucose, cover, low glucose, eat, high glucose cover. I just feel trapped, like my life is a giant circle and I'm not going anywhere. I'm just stuck. Can someone help me end this cycle?

Hi jasmine1616. By school I presume you mean either high school or college. Whichever it’s a tough time to be marked out as “different”. It’s a mine field without being T1, so it’s not surprising you feel alone. You’re right about even the best intentioned bestie not having a clue. Talk about trial by fire. Do you have the support of a specialist diabetic team? Check out if there are others in your area in the same boat as you. I see you’re into sports - good for you! That cannot have been easy getting your insulin right - so you must be a determined person. You may even be able to help others who are more fearful in that department. Stay strong but be kind to yourself. I’m older and now I just test and inject when and where I want - I think old folk get more bolshie. Lol. Rant away though - that’s a big part of the forum! X

 

[Daibell]

Hi. From what you say it seems like your insulin balance may not be ideal? If you are under and overshooting frequently and needing to correct too often then perhaps some tweeking can be done? Forgive me if you have already balanced them as best you can with the support of your DN. I assume you are on Basal/Bolus (MDI)? Have you checked your Basal balance recently and doing carb-counting with the Bolus. What insulins are you using; occasionally changing the type can help a little? Do let us know what level of support you are getting from the nurse or clinic.

 

[kayla2212]

Ah bless ya I really feel for you I am not diabetic myself but my 8 year old is and all tho I don't have all the emotional state you can feel with sugars going high or low I can understand the feeling of being on your own not only is my daughter type 1 she has celiac as well and when we're out at birthday party's etc I feel like you alone cos everybody else can give there kids whatever they want without it effecting them I can't and I do worry that when she gets older she will feel the same as you do I totally get where your coming from and having a friend that is willing to try and understand is a keeper I take it you have support from family just speak to people about it and get things of your chest or come on here and have a chat I think people that have diabetes are some strong people with what you have to deal with look after yourself x

 

[NicoleC1971]

Hi. Feel for you over there and grappling with this solo. You are not alone on this forum. I had it whilst at school and university too and found that I really didn't want it to define me and to be talking about the struggle all the time. Now I haave a 6 monthly meet up with my diabetic friends at a bar and know that I can rant if I feel like it without inducing pity (the reaction of some kind non diabs), anxiety (from parents) or misunderstanding (friends struggling to get why you can't just set an insulin dose that always works or do occasionally eat chocolate). Anyway if you cannot find a local diabuddies group you will find acceptance and understanding here. And tell yourself you are doing well just to be coping with diabetes and your studies etc.xxx

 

[NoKindOfSusie]

Do you ever just feel so alone because of your diabetes? I feel so awkward whenever I'm with my friends if we go out to eat or something. They'll just start eating and I have to check my glucose. Does anyone else feel like this