Insensitive Boss! :(

[kerchinga]

Hi all, just looking to have a moan tbh! Was diagnosed in May this year, at the same time my sister was told she had breast cancer and my grandfather discovered he had terminal lung cancer – so overall stress levels in our family were through the roof!! Took control of my diet to some extent and my Hba1c results came in at 5.8 which I understand is good? Well I’ve had a few wobbles diet wise since then( mostly alcohol related) but the hardest thing is avoiding sweets and cakes in the office. I’ve told my colleagues that I’m diabetic and am trying to avoid certain types of foods only to be informed this morning by my manager that ‘Diabetes is a lifestyle choice and that basically if I wasn’t so fat I wouldn’t be diabetic’
Now I know there are corralations between the two but I am so cross that she felt the need to point this out to me. I now feel totally humiliated and ashamed of myself and my body. Just want to go home, curl up in a corner and cry! 

 

[Engineer88]

Hugs

Know how you feel about curling up and crying right now x

 

[noblehead]

Charming I'm sure :shock:

I would do one of two things, either ignore her horrible comment or take it to a higher level with senior management, as you have enough on your hands with family issues at home I would be inclined to ignore it or have a quiet word with her about her insensitivity towards you.

I

 

[Fiona I]

I would tell you can loose weight and control your diabetes however she will find it harder to get rid of that stinking attitude she has :lol: :lol:
On a lighter note I have the same issue we have Fat Fridays at work cakes bacon butties chippy for dinner sweets chocolates the lot. :? :?
Its taken me months not to feel deprived and some times I do give in that's a tuff one as birthdays meetings etc you are always going to encounter sweet things or carbs. Don't deny yourself everything in moderation

 

[equipoise]

That's great! The hba1c, I mean -- but that's the point. If you can control your diabetes that's the crucial issue. Your manager is ill-informed and stupid, but so are many many people, and the media keeps pushing the lifestyle point. Your hba1c tells you what a star you are, not your manager's ignorance. I'd let it pass, concentrate on having a diet that is better than your work colleagues', and then choose your moment to point this out to them.

 

[kerchinga]

I'm choosing to rise above it and just ignore her! Also she's the director of the company so there's no one higher I could take any complaint to anyway. Oh well, she's always struggling to lose weight so I guess the best thing I can do is continue with my diet and get to my ideal shape.... that'l be a poke in the eye to her! :lol:

 

[equipoise]

That's it! :thumbup: :thumbup: Go for it!!!!

 

[wellwell1212]

Workplace bullies are the pits. Hold your head high, easy for me to say but, don't let them win. I have been there with T2 issues and a bullying employer so, you have my sympathy :wave:

 

[luceeloo]

You boss sounds like a right nasty woman! You sound like you are coping great with your diabetes, so keep doing what you are doing

 

[angieG]

I'm choosing to rise above it and just ignore her! Also she's the director of the company so there's no one higher I could take any complaint to anyway. Oh well, she's always struggling to lose weight so I guess the best thing I can do is continue with my diet and get to my ideal shape.... that'l be a poke in the eye to her! :lol:

Well if she is overweight she could end up in the same boat....her lifestyle choice!
Don't let her get to you, let it motivate your diet even more and really p*** her off by turning slim and sexy while she is still a spiteful moo!!

Angie

 

[Andy12345]

slightly different tactic, you could beat the **** out of her?

well done on your hba1c your doing terrific, keep it up, when the fellas at work eat junk which is pretty much all day everyday i give them stick about it all the time, they take no notice but it makes me feel good that im choosing a better way and they are just plain daft to be eating like that and im sure they admire the effort and willpower we can demonstrate :thumbup:

best of luck

 

[Dustybin]

I generally find that people of this woman's ilk are unable to cope at all if they are ill or have problems in their lives.
You wont change her mind whatever you do so she is best ignored . She may have been fortunate so far but eventually she may
have cause to regret or rethink her attitude.

If she really gets to you try leaving a few 'educational' articles about diabetes where she will see them

I am sure she must make herself unpopular with her attitude so just concentrate on getting your colleagues onside so you will have support..

Y

 

[Paul_c]

one of these days it's going to be realised that being overweight isn't a cause of T2 diabetes, it's a symptom...

 

[))Denise((]

I'm wheat intolerant, so this gets me out of the cakes in the office. Although if you said this it would mean no sandwiches either. Could you say that you can't eat margarine?

It is easier to say I'm wheat intolerant than telling the world and his wife that I have Type 2.

 

[kerchinga]

Well I think a lot of her attitude towards me is caused by the fact that when first diagnosed I had to have quite a few doctors/hospital appointments - such as blood tests, eye exam, foot exam. (had to explain I was diabetic at this point ) All this, coupled with having to have more time off work for when my Grandad died and being with my sister when she was having her surgery has just led her to think I'm a skiver!

 

[sheepareevil]

I think your boss just sounds like a small minded person. You must be a very strong person to have gone through everything you have gone through and to have got your blood sugars under control. I'm sure with the strength that you have shown that when you are in the right head space and when you feel it is the right time you will lose any weight that you want to lose.
Besides they do not know what causes type 2, they found that if you are overweight you are more likely to have type 2 but they can't prove if it's the cause of getting type 2 or a symptom. There is so much opinion shared as fact in the media about diabetes in general that it drives me nuts.
Besides there are too many cases of healthy people that have never had weight problems that get type 2 diabetes and so many cases of overweight people who don't have diabetes for it to be as simple as "overweight = get diabetes".

 

[mokum_man]

Tell her you can lose weight but she can't change her ugly face

 

[hornplayer]

People can be so unkind. I don't know where they think they get the right to judge other people.


Sent from the Diabetes Forum App

 

[raistlin_wendy]

i understand the same thing, but i work within healthcare as a staff nurse.

my bosses are now complaining about my sickness - i suffer from 2 chronic illness (daibetes type 2 on insulin and i inject victoza and asthma) i also suffer from IBS, depression and fertility problems.

i now have to have a HR meeting
which im dreadding.

 

[mikegresty]

Hi all, just looking to have a moan tbh! Was diagnosed in May this year, at the same time my sister was told she had breast cancer and my grandfather discovered he had terminal lung cancer – so overall stress levels in our family were through the roof!! Took control of my diet to some extent and my Hba1c results came in at 5.8 which I understand is good? Well I’ve had a few wobbles diet wise since then( mostly alcohol related) but the hardest thing is avoiding sweets and cakes in the office. I’ve told my colleagues that I’m diabetic and am trying to avoid certain types of foods only to be informed this morning by my manager that ‘Diabetes is a lifestyle choice and that basically if I wasn’t so fat I wouldn’t be diabetic’
Now I know there are corralations between the two but I am so cross that she felt the need to point this out to me. I now feel totally humiliated and ashamed of myself and my body. Just want to go home, curl up in a corner and cry! 

I know what id have told her. such ignorance only exists on earth so the insecure and stupid can help make themselves feel better as for her opinion well that's just further proof of a lack of education dont ever feel bad about yourself for being who you are and always remember how much better than the boss you are for you have to hurt no one to be happy .