Anie
Well-Known Member
- Messages
- 306
- Type of diabetes
- Treatment type
- Tablets (oral)
I telling you this as a cautionary tale (not to stress you!)
There is a guy at work with an ulcer on his foot.
Overweight. Forties. No idea if he's ever been tested, or if he is a diabetic (not something he discusses).
About February (6 months ago!), he started taking time off on Thursday afternoons to have his dressing changed. First we'd heard of the problem.
He resisted all attempts to get him to sit with his foot elevated, or with a footstool.
No improvement since.
He went on a camping holiday last 2 weeks. Came back saying that he spent most of the hol sitting in front of the tent because it was too painful to be active, and that maybe, just maybe, all that sitting with his foot elevated may have helped...
But he's sitting with his foot down again.
Sometimes I despair...
The lessons I have learned from this ridiculous tale, is
- Take it seriously from the start
- Accept that healing may take longer than expected
- Use common sense!!!
Hello Molly, even from here I can see the lava erupting from the volcano, you have takem so much on in trying to help the man and get the help and support that he needs, but you also need as a carering woman.
Molly ask yourself these questions, is the ulcer showing any signs of improvemnet, is it getting any bigger, and does the man walk with ease?.
?Could the change of date have anything todo with the treatment of the ulcer.
?Does the podiatrist want to co0ordinate their appointment with the gp, for medication to help the healing.
Do you think that the man's ulcer would worsen while he is away in very high tempreatures and the risk of sand getting into the ulcer?
Molly dear lady, step back, go on step back, now go and take yourself out for a nice day, can your friend join you for this emergency intervention?
I understand your frustration, you looking forward to your holiday, and now this man is risking everything because of his attitude to his condition. Worst case senario, if the holiday has to be cancelled, will your holiday insurance (you have got good insurance), refund the money due to a medical emergency?. Then if this happens, you and your friend book a holiday for you both and go away and rest, what do you think?.
Molly you have put so much energy into looking after the man, who does want to look after himself, so take a rest and think about do you really want to go on holiday with the man, and all the stress he causes you?,
Keep posting you stresses and we are all here, ttfn
Sorry, missed this part of your post
In relation to food I do try where possible to buy the food that he should eat and am gradually altering what we eat based on what I am learning from the website / forum.
However I cannot be held responsible for what he chooses to eat whilst I am out at work during the day.
Being retired he tends to get up late and generally skips breakfast. Have stressed the importance of eating breakfast but he hasn't listened / is stuck in his ways - think this will be more critical now after recent change in medication. He then tends to go to local supermarket / cafe for lunch and to get the papers / shopping when needed.
Am trying to lead by example by cutting down on desserts / cakes / biscuits (good for my health / weight control so not a real sacrifice) but if he buys
these when I am not around I can't be held responsible for his actions.
I know you care about him, but is really don't know where you get the patience from!
What I put do you have in relation to his diet? This may be a starting point, if you don't buy the food he shouldn't eat, will he go out and buy it and cook it?
In relation to driving I would suggest that if he doesn't test before driving that he will probably invalidate his insurance. Also, if he drives, has a hypo and kills someone how is he going to feel? If he kills himself then how are you going to feel? It then raises the question does he really care about you like you do about him because people who care about other people don't treat their love ones like this. Also, are you going to get in the car with him driving if he hasn't tested???
Sorry to sound brutal, but there are questions you need to know the answers to.
My husband was diagnosed T2 about 2 months ago he is 82 so it was quite a shock but at least from routine yearly blood tests he had not had it for long GP said it was probably because he takes steroids for Polymaligia..He was only just over 7 when he was diagnosed.
He leaves it totally up to me as to what he eats as I do the cooking and he would never go and buy stuff himself. He has given up all sugar stuff..he had a really sweet tooth for cake biscuits ice cream and sweet yogurts. Now he only has plain greek yogurt which he does sweeten a little bit with Stevia sweetener he still eats a banana a day...used to be three or four... usually with the yogurt as a dessert. He had always been a cereal with toast and jam eater for breakfast that is now cut right down although he does have Shredded Wheat or corn flakes some mornings but a smaller amount than he did have. Main meals is usually meat with vegetables not really cut out any vegetables in particular we have always liked all veg he just has smaller portions of root ones or a salad with cold chicken or ham and this seems to be working for him .He takes 2 Metformin twice a day and he did get a meter from his DN and prescription strips..GP said they will stop eventually though... but she told him he only needs to test occasionally just to see how his BG is going so that is all he will do but she did say to him always make sure he had something to eat before he drives but never said much about diet. Good luck with your husband I am sure you and him will cope fine as he gets more used to it
@Molly56 I think we all have concern over your health..
My concern is that if your holiday has to be cancelled over this foot ulcer, will it cover both of your cancellations as technically your partner is not hospitalised and would be if he chose to be quite able to look after himself... So I am wondering if the insurance would give a full payout for both holidays.
However, I will now ask after you... How are you?
Hi Molly, yes you do need to look after yourself more, over caring for him in doors is stretching your own well being,
I am an aromatherapist and maybe a relaxation time would be good for you.
Think about trying this little technique, have a warm damp face cloth, drip a couple of drops of geranium essential oil on it and place in various places around your neck, face, for a few minutes each, with your eyes closed and think about fluffy clouds or something, and relax switch off your ears, and switch off the over caring section of your brain, it's Molly time!.
Do you think him in doors after the visit to podiatrist, and getting the verdict will be worried about things, even his holiday.
Molly maybe your doctor would give you the thorough over haul, have you had any blood tests done to check on your blood count and to ensure you are not becoming run down with all you are undertaking, keep posting Molly, ttfn