Feeling alone?

[JShep07]

i have been diabetic for 14 years now and if I'm honest I feel like I'm fighting a losing battle

 

[therower]

Hi @JShep07 . So sorry to hear you're struggling. Is there anything in particular you're having problems with?
Diabetes never gives up, it's always going to be a part of your life.
Why battle it everyday? Even if you win today, the battle recommences tomorrow. No one can sustain a daily battle like that.
Have you tried to embrace your diabetes, make it your best friend, make it the reason you do everything in life.
Diabetes is a very powerful enemy, as you know. But make it your friend and it loses a lot of it's power. Make your diabetes understand that you're the boss, you call the shots.
It'll kick and fuss and try to catch you out, when it does, let it have it's moment then put it back in its place.
It's a mindset thing, respect it but make it respect you more. Make it realise that are the master.
Not sure if this helps or even makes sense but it works for me.
Albeit me being extremely older than you.

 

[Freema]

welcome here JShep07, there are a lot of other young people in here type 1 that also fight , hope you´ll find some of them...

 

[Soapybubs87]

i have been diabetic for 14 years now and if I'm honest I feel like I'm fighting a losing battle

Hi, may i ask how old you are and when you got diagnosed i was diagnose when i was nearly 15 so 15 years ago! I ask your age as i found my teens and early 20s the hardest to come to terms being diabetic and really abused myself with regards to eating rubbish not checkinv bms and missinv or delaying insulin as i didnt want to have the questions or feel singled out, ive only been on here a few hours but already had so much support and kond words said to me! You arent the only person to feel like this trust me i do and im sure loads of others do!!

 

[JShep07]

Hi, may i ask how old you are and when you got diagnosed i was diagnose when i was nearly 15 so 15 years ago! I ask your age as i found my teens and early 20s the hardest to come to terms being diabetic and really abused myself with regards to eating rubbish not checkinv bms and missinv or delaying insulin as i didnt want to have the questions or feel singled out, ive only been on here a few hours but already had so much support and kond words said to me! You arent the only person to feel like this trust me i do and im sure loads of others do!!

Hiya, I am 20 and was diagnosed at 6. I do the same as you did when you were my age and basically try and pretend i don't have it. I hate all the sympathy people try and give me! its nice to know it's not just me feeling this way so thankyou so much for your message

 

[Soapybubs87]

Hiya, I am 20 and was diagnosed at 6. I do the same as you did when you were my age and basically try and pretend i don't have it. I hate all the sympathy people try and give me! its nice to know it's not just me feeling this way so thankyou so much for your message

Oh bkess you!! Not defo not but i will tell you one thing...and i dont want to scare you and it may possibly fall on deaf ears as it did with me many times, it isnt worth it i am having lazer and jabs in my eyes because of bot looking after myself and feeling ashamed that i have diabetes im 30 and got told at 28 i may go blind i did lose my sight i couldbt eveb see my own face in a mirror thank god for the doctors! Im not going to lecture you about conplications ect as it used to drive me mad!! All i will say is if you ever need to talk message me, defo kbow what you are going through.. i think everyone goes through this stage where they think stuff it and go off the rails...totally normal and i sah that from a T1 diabetic view and as a nurse =)

 

[JShep07]

it's definitely a very difficult condition to live with! Was it the troubles with your eyes that made you start taking control of your diabetes if you don't mind me asking? I feel like it's going to take something similar for me to finally pull my finger out as I've been neglecting myself for many years now but talking to other people such as yourself is the first step I've taken in years to change so thankyou for being so understanding! And thankyou so much for offering me to message you if I ever need to! Your actually the first person I've opened up to about my struggles

 

[Soapybubs87]

Ermm yes and no with the eyes i was working on a acute medical unit and the sites i was seeing of badly controlled diabetics..with their gangreen toes and blindness and going for dyalisis was the first step..i have been admitted a lot of times with dka and seeing someone the same age as me arrest and die because of dka terrified me...the eyes were because i went from horrifically controlled to perfect im talking a hba1c of 123 to 63 in 3 or 4 months the snall vessels at the back of the eye that supply the retina (bit that helps you actually see) with oygen bleed and tiny new frail vessels form which also bleed and your eye sight just deteriorates as the scar tissue builds up you run the risk of your retina detaching i sobbed (i libe alone) so i felt so alone and scared, the eye thibg was in the last year and a half..dont get me wrong i am a lot better controlled i still drink alcohol now and again and still have cheeky treats but i know how to manage my insulin so that i can...try asking about the daphny course when you are ready it teaxhes you to manage insulin and foods so that you can eat what your mates are ect i still keep the whole im diabetoc thibg quiet i tell who i need to (i was in a 14 month relationship and he didnt even know!) But i just know how to be descrete with my insulin ive even been looking in to a pump

 

[leahkian]

I was 3 when i got diabetes in 1979 them days diabetes was no where near the advances that have happened. My first injection was a glass pen shape with a neddle which was a bout 2 inches long so now seeing insulin pumps is great. The thing is when you grow up being a diabetic you just look like anyone else just getting on with life, its not like you are in a wheelchair and people can see it. When i was a teens i did not tell everyone that i was a diabetic, then one night when a girl asked could she catch it by kissing. I made my mind up and started telling people yes i am a diabetic and yes i hate having it but this is who i am. I hope both of you take care off your diabetes because i would not like you to go through what i have been through, including laser treatment on both eyes and 6 ops on eyes from the age of 8-21 it was a bad time ans since the age of 18 i have been on anti-depressents and i still take them now. I also see the mental mental health team on a regular basis as i find talking to them is a lot easy than telling someone close to me. I have had 6 ops on my hands and elbow and after that i was told i would need a kidney transplant by the time i was 30 and yes i cried and thought why me but i got to 38 before i had a SPK transplant which are both doing fine but it was only then did i find out what diabetes had done to me all my nerve endings are shot, my bladder is enlarged it can hold over 10 pints of fluid so i sometimes i have to use a catheter and of course plenty of hospital stays with my diabetes. People ask me what do i think of diabetes and i tell them it is a silent killer because it does so much damage inside you can't see. I also have a brother who is a diabetic and has never accepted it and the local hospital have told him they will not treat him if he does not make a effort, he still has not and uses drugs and alcohol. I am not trying to put the fear of god into you but try your best with it as diabetes in a marathon and not a sprint. On a happier not i did once tell a old consultant that he kept wagging his finger in my face i was going to put him through the window, we were on the second floor, that appointment never went on much longer. I am asking you to tell people you are a diabetic and do not hide it because if you take bad when you are out drinking they might think that you are drunk, telling people about diabetes is teaching them as well. you did not choose diabetes it chose you and you have to take it day by day. Good luck both of yous

 

[NinaB73]

Oh this feels so sad to me because I can empathise completely. I was diagnosed at aged 7, I am now in my 40's and consider myself lucky.

I now have fairly serious problems with my eyes but after 35 years and some serious neglect in my youth I am quite surprised I haven't had more problems like @leahkian . But I guess that is luck of the draw. Like @Soapybubs87 I am getting marvellous treatment to maintain my eyesight. But I am in a constant state of guilt and high alert that the next thing is around the corner and like you get so fed up with being diabetic.
The everyday highs and lows are enough to live with alone without the rest to consider.

What I will say though as it all seems doom and gloom, is that I only discovered this site a couple of years ago and the support and just the knowledge of others living with diabetes is a great tonic! Others in our lives, however well they mean will never really understand the commitment needed to manage this condition. So many other conditions, 'you just take this tablet or this dose and away you go', and I know many people around me think I just take a set dose of medication and that's it!

Understanding from others is a great help and don't be too hard on yourself, you are young and mature enough obviously to realise the potential dangers of not being in control. Diabetes, although a pain in the **** hasn't ever stopped me living a great life so far!

Good luck and we are always here to bend an ear!

Nina

 

[Codythechef]

Hiya, I am 20 and was diagnosed at 6. I do the same as you did when you were my age and basically try and pretend i don't have it. I hate all the sympathy people try and give me! its nice to know it's not just me feeling this way so thankyou so much for your message

I did exactly the same as u have done!! Pretended I didn’t have type1 for many years and looking back on it I’m surprised I even survived. I am
I’m 37 now and diagnosed when only 7 years old. My god how treatments have changed over the years. I missed out on all the goings on at hospital appointments as I very rarely went to mine. I had to do the dafne course for a better understanding of type1 to then get into pumping and it really is a lifesaving decision I made. Please try not to underestimate the POWER OF TYPE1 DIABETES, and good luck fighting it as we all do on a daily basis

 

[Vamshi532]

I did exactly the same as u have done!! Pretended I didn’t have type1 for many years and looking back on it I’m surprised I even survived. I am
I’m 37 now and diagnosed when only 7 years old. My god how treatments have changed over the years. I missed out on all the goings on at hospital appointments as I very rarely went to mine. I had to do the dafne course for a better understanding of type1 to then get into pumping and it really is a lifesaving decision I made. Please try not to underestimate the POWER OF TYPE1 DIABETES, and good luck fighting it as we all do on a daily basis

Hello
I'm 27 years old now diagnosed with type 1 diabetes 3 years ago.im using insulin pen now.i Dnt know about insulin pump.is it a good idea to switch to pump ??

 

[fletchweb]

i have been diabetic for 14 years now and if I'm honest I feel like I'm fighting a losing battle

I can understand how you feel but you can win this battle - I feel I have!

I was diagnosed at 4 and stayed in a pediatric ICU at Sick Children's Hospital for about 2 months (I was diagnosed late and my parents almost lost me) , I'm 55 now, have two non diabetic kids who are 22 and 26 and I'm healthier and more active than most non diabetics my age.

It can be done and there's people who have done it.

Stay strong and try not to let it get you down when you hit high BGs or a doctor puts the fear of death in you because your not meeting that doctor's expectations.

A little secret - as I had the "Fear of Death" instilled in me by idiot doctors - by the time I was 10, I decided to live every day like it was my last. I'm glad I did because so far my life has been great and if I should die tomorrow (not counting it) I will be satisfied knowing that I have made the most of my life. I think this has been partly responsible for my current health and state of mind.

Try not to let it get you down.

 

[NewTD2]

i have been diabetic for 14 years now and if I'm honest I feel like I'm fighting a losing battle

Hi mate don’t give up we’re here to help

 

[donnellysdogs]

First off, welcome and glad that OP is able to talk to us.

Unfortunately, it does take a life changing health event for the most of us humans to make a change to our living.

Ok, so diabetes is life changing. However, we cant see what damage (or not) it is actually doing inside our bodies. As youngsters we want to fit in with non diabetic children..and eating and doing the same as them. However we need to test and inject first. That can get in the way of living "normally"....

However, we should pay that 2 minutes pre meals, exercise etc... and this really is all that it is... just to ensure we can keep "normal"....

It is so **** tough. I remember without the internet and not knowing a single T1 diabetic. Not until Gary Mabbutt and his brother Kevin came in to my life.. that changed things for me. Gary being a football player and what I thought was famous (Bristol City and Rovers) at the time and Gary was able to do what he wanted..
I can remember Kevin taking me around Weymouth in his conertible Volkswagen and making me feel so special.
I always looked up to Gary as a role model for me to follow.

It is hard to struggle alone.
To be honest, I dont know how I would cope now with all the foods, cafes, cinemas, takeaways, shops around. I know I would struggle if I was younger. I didnt have that much choice in my younger life...

However, its not all doom and gloom... we can go on living a fulfilling and good life but it is that two minutes of extra time that needs to be fitted in around our activities....

I was also shown a ward through a window with a couple amputees in it.... and it shocked me when I was diagnosed.... I'm not sure nowadays whether this "softly, softly approach" to diabetes diagnosis is the best. I was told I would get a medal if I got to 25 years with it (now you got to buy your own at 50 years!! ), I was told I would die early....
It scared me. I am way beyond this now and no direct complications to T1diabetes...

You arent alone... it can be a struggle... but honestly, for me, I think I am a kinder, nicer, more tolerant person for being individually different to the majority!!

 

[Lulu9101112]

i have been diabetic for 14 years now and if I'm honest I feel like I'm fighting a losing battle

I've been diabetic type 1 for 11yrs just remember TD1 doesn't affect you in doing daily activities we just have to be more careful but can still do anything. There's worst things you could of gotten like being blind/deaf, having one arm/leg etc... Diabeties is just an obstacle we all have to overcome. What affects met the most with diabeties is stress. But i just think diabeties is a unique thing and that's what makes us us. Like we're all diverse in some way, some people are deaf, some are blind, some have asthama, some are diabetic etc... The world probs wouldn't be the same if there were no diabetics to be honest. But as i said diabeties doesn't stop us from doing anything we just have to be careful

 

[Nurgis Ansari]

Yes
I also feel alone.
Diabetic is a silent killer

 

[Knikki]

Hello there @Nurgis Ansari welcome to the forum.

Silent killer? well like many things in life diabetes is a royal PITA but with todays information at hand plus blood testing gear, it is not hard to mange anymore, certainly not when you consider that in the 70's and 80's it was one injection a day (insulin derived from pig I think), urine testing (up to 5 hours or more out) and plenty of people came through that, me being one of them.

Over 50years as a T1D and loving life, so if I can do it anyone can

 

[Soniaphildil]

I totally agree with u though before reading this msg I felt the same way as jshep07 did

 

[JShep07]

I've been diabetic type 1 for 11yrs just remember TD1 doesn't affect you in doing daily activities we just have to be more careful but can still do anything. There's worst things you could of gotten like being blind/deaf, having one arm/leg etc... Diabeties is just an obstacle we all have to overcome. What affects met the most with diabeties is stress. But i just think diabeties is a unique thing and that's what makes us us. Like we're all diverse in some way, some people are deaf, some are blind, some have asthama, some are diabetic etc... The world probs wouldn't be the same if there were no diabetics to be honest. But as i said diabeties doesn't stop us from doing anything we just have to be careful

How do you stay so positive about it though? To me it literally feels like the worse thing in the world but then again i feel like i am the only diabetic injecting 4 times a day that has been diagnosed with needlephobia