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Grrrrr need to rant

amberzak said:
Seriously, what the hell. How come all of you seem to have control. I'm reading about people who are considering a reading of 12 high, or getting their Hba1c right down. And I'm able to advise other people, but I can't get it right myself. I'm so frustrated. Sorry, I just need to rant.

What is going on? How come I can't control my sugars, no matter what I do? I carb count, but all I seem to do is do correction doses, and that doesn't even seem to be right. I mean, yes, I am much better. No hypos and not been higher than 18 in the last 5 days (yes, that's actually better) but I've been testing 10 to 16 times a day, doing as my tester says (I have the Aviva expert) so acting on my readings.

Today, for example. Started at 6.8. Ate breakfast after my morning tutoring, so didnt eat or drink anything other than water, but I still got a reading of 10.2 at 11.30. Corrected, and got it down to 8.4 which I'm happy with. Then it went up again. Been steadily going up. This has happened every day, and normally I can correct and bring myself back down. But despite my many testing and correcting, tonight I have a reading of 15. Grrrrr. Why? I am trying so hard. I really am. All I'm thinking about is diabetes. It's not like I'm not trying.

This was where I got to before. And it just makes me want to give up.

I'm on multiple injections, but really want the pump.

Oh, and everything affects my sugars. And I mean EVERYTHING. We were told you don't need to inject for 10 grams of carbs, but I had a cup of tea yesterday (3 grams) and it spiked my sugars.

Why can't I get it right? I'm sorry. I am really happy for you all who have it under control. As I am people I know. But when a friend of mine (type one as well) says 'I'm high, look' and his reading is 12, and I think 12 is quite common for me, it really depresses me.

I know that stress affects it, as does weather. I know I probably haven't got my background insulin right. I know it takes time to get it right and it's trial and error. I'm aware that I've been giving advice to others on the forum, and I probably can find reasons for all this. It's just so really frustrating.

And having people from church moan at me yesterday didnt help. I thought I'd been doing really well. Considering my life before this meter was hypo, to off the scale high, to hypo, to off the scale high, this is so much better. And I proudly told a friend who's daughter has type one (and just had a baby) so she understands. She was saying well done. And then this stupid woman who is a nurse stuck her nose in and looked at my readings (I was showing the friend). '11s, 12s. You really shouldn't be in double digits. It's isn't good. You need to work on your sugars'. WHAT THE HELL DOES SHE THINK I'M TRYING TO DO?!? Grrrrrrrr

I'm sorry. I'm tired, I feel put down (her comments must have played on my mind because I've just brought it up), and I think it's my wrong time of the month. Sorry to bug you all. Just really needing some TLC at the moment.


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After reading your post i let out an audible sigh.... you seem to be so much like me before the insulin stopped working, hypo-high, hypo-high was my life for a long time and i think the more hard you try the more bamboozled you get, i give advice out to a friends son a lot as hes always mucking around and i try to help and yet my bloods are bloody awful a lot of the time. I havnt got to grips with the carb counting yet so you are a better person than me, i should take my own advice more often, chill a little dont give yourself a hard time it will all come together. I think what would help is for a nurse or consultant in the diabetic field to actually have diabetes so they could understand just how difficult it can be, i feel they look down there noses some time and make it all sound so simple BUT THE FACT IS ITS NOT SIMPLE and every day is a balancing act and for every day you get right pat yourself on the back and if it goes wrong well there is always tomorrow to make it better. x
 
Thundercat said:
Everyone is entitled to an opinion but it is my opinion that the previous post is both reckless and dangerous. I have had diabetes for 28 years and last year for the first time I had a retinal bleed. I have mild neuropathy and early stage kidney damage. I was in denial of my diabetes for a long time and I know in my heart that my complications are a direct result of that. I now have stable bg levels and very very few hypos purely as a result of reducing my carbs (currently 80-100g daily) . I think I personally would find very low carbing difficult to do but of I have to, I will. I like being healthy and well and anything I have to do to continue being so is a small price indeed. The previous poster may well feel he is somehow getting away with it but, in truth, the longer you live with erratic control the shorter your odds on developing complications. IMHO anyone with sense should disregard advice that basically says 'to hell with it and take your chances'.

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Well Thundercat, we have both had diabetes for round about the same length of time, i'm "reckless and dangerous" in my outlook, you know how many carbs you take daily, who's in the best health? Sorry for sounding blase and flippant but I was stating facts in my post.
I can assure you I do not feel I am "somehow getting away with it" far from it. A lot of it is luck, you could talk to 1,000 diabetics and everyone of them would have a different way of dealing with it, using different insulin and taking different amounts etc. etc.
It is "horses for courses", deal with it as you will.
It will get you in the end, if not that then something else. "Did you know that 100% of NON smokers die?"....Bernard Manning.
 
Just for the record, my complications are the result of life before controlling my carbs. On the 29th of December I had an appointment at the eye Clinic which showed new vessel growth in my 'good' eye which would require laser treatment. Panic stations. My first treatment last year resulted in an anaesthetic injection in my eye which scared the **** out of me. As a result of the new vessels I became more determined than ever to get even better bg levels. Went for laser treatment this Monday only to be told that the vessels had shrunk to one third the size and didn't require laser. Doctor's comment: "whatever you're doing, keep doing it". Those are the kind of facts that motivate me. Yes, we will all die one way or another but retaining good quality of life while we are here is a worthy goal. I am very fortunate and blessed that my complications are mild.and do not affect my quality of life and I will do my utmost to keep it that way. Bad stuff can still happen even with the best control but I have no plans to turn it into a self fulfilling prophecy. Is it easy staying on top of the whole diabetes malarkey? No. Does it sometimes seem more trouble than it's worth? Yes. I would rather be optimistic than fatalistic. That is the course this horse has chosen.


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Sarah Ann Hodges said:
BUT THE FACT IS ITS NOT SIMPLE and every day is a balancing act and for every day you get right pat yourself on the back and if it goes wrong well there is always tomorrow to make it better. x
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A very positive way to look at it .. i like that :borg:
 
Hi Amber!

I am the same - absolutely everything spikes me. The advice about not jabbing for 10g or less is absolute rubbish - Hell, 6g of carb gets me out of a hypo! I jab for ALL carb including vegetables, beans, pulses, yoghurt etc. If it's a carb I need insulin.

Like SamJB I got my HbA1c down by cutting out most of the main carbs.

I suspect your basal isn't quite right - but I think you know that. I would also say that you hint that your period is about to start - many of us ladies know that our BG goes mad the week leading up to our period with uncontrollable random highs - and then drops like a stone when the period actually starts. I have no idea why diabetes consultants and DSNs don't know this!

Smidge
 
Hi Amber, sorry that you are going through such a rough time. Try to relax and you will get there eventually, I know that is easier there then done and that it's sounds patronising but you have plenty of friends on here if you went to vent and a wealth of experience diabetic professionals to help. Hugs :)
 
Smidge l didn't but it does explain last weeks weird highs when l had only eaten my normal food, l thought it was getting over my tooth infection, thanks :) been totally off any timetable on my monthlies last few months so no pattern showed.
MID
 
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